Okay so I absolutely love Maria and I really hope that she’s the one that Mei ends up with. Her being kinda jaded and obviously having been hurt before, combined with her trying to keep her cool while she’s falling hopelessly in love with Mei and dealing with her simmering jealousy towards the other girls is just the perfect combination. I hope that she opens up about her past and the fact that she’s clearly gone through it and may be recovering from heartbreak. Like when she warns Mei to not give up on her honesty so she doesn’t turn into a “twisted old lady” like her in chapter 5, or when she reflects on failing to confess to someone in chapter 13 (okay there’s a slight chance this may be about Mei).
So, there’s her jealousy and possessiveness over Mei, which she tries to hide but eventually spills out to. It’s obviously laid out in chapter 5 when she sees Mei and Kaoru together and is repeated whenever she’s longingly watching from the sidelines. I think it reaches a climax in chapter 18—my girl’s world literally crumbles around her as Mei talks about kissing other girls. I wish she’d said something about??? Like just express your feelings girl damn. Even when they’re about to make out Maria can’t stop thinking about who kissed Mei before. And then when theyre actually kissing shes STILL THINKING ABOUT IT and is like do it to me like it was done to you???? Like that’s crazy. The fucking angst. The tension. My god I think this moment is what made me realize that I was ride or die for Mei and Maria. What’s crazier is that at the yakiniku place in chapter 23 she’s also like “kiss me like you did with Karin.” She just can’t stop thinking about all the girls that Mei has kissed and this is the first time she actually expresses that jealousy out loud. It honestly makes me sad that all she can think of when she’s about to kiss the woman she loves is how that woman is currently seeing other people. That sadness and angst is just so fucking good.
The last big thing is something that Maria thinks once and says out loud once, again. In chapter 5, during her fantasy about Mei, she tells Maria “stay with me forever.” Okay, so this is like their second time meeting and Maria is already fantasizing about them having sex and Mei expressing her desire to spend her life with her. Ignoring the fact that it’s probably not healthy for Maria to instantly think of this (and probably speaks to past heartbreak), that tinge of sadness hiding behind the surface is what makes her so compelling. In chapter 23, when Maria is drunk and truly honest to Mei, she tells her “don’t leave, stay with me forever.” I know I’m taking this way too seriously but god DAMN this broke my heart Maria is just so scared and so hurt and so in love and I want nothing more than for Mei to soothe her fears and for them to end up together forever. What more is there to say: Maria is an incredibly flawed person who can’t handle her desire and her pain in a healthy way, but this makes her an incredibly compelling character with more depth than the others. She’s got my heart and I realllyyyyyyyy really want her and Mei to end up together.
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