Ayaka idolizes Hiroko because the latter represents what she wants to be professionally. At least, that is how her interest in her started out in the flashback. Ayaka has a deeply-seated insecurity about herself, presumably a anxiety about failure, and latches onto a person who she perceives as perfect, oblivious to the fact that she has only ever seen one of Hiroko's facets, her persona at work.

Ayaka is simply intrigued by the fact that Hiroko actually enjoys being at work. She's not envious of Hiroko's technical or people skills. She also never puts herself down for not getting close to her co-workers. She refuses to attend the networking events because she does not want to do work off the clock (reasonable and based), not because of anxiety. In the chapter 8 flashback, she tells Risa that she ended up alone at work due to getting tunnel vision, and does not mention shyness.

When she comes back to the office in the evening and sees so many people still there, she suspects trouble. The part where she realizes that it's her fault that the files disappeared from the server does not betray any chronic anxiety. It's perfectly normal to be a bit stressed if a mistake you made at work made trouble for other people, especially for a rookie.

After she and Hiroko manage to recover the files, Hiroko reassures her that she was never in trouble, and she is moved by Hiroko's kindness, and becomes even more interested in her. No chronic anxiety or distorted self-image is required.

last edited at Jun 13, 2023 8:15PM

Maybe a hot take

A freezing cold take, given that most everybody in this thread but me agrees with you.

Count me in. It's 2 against the world lol.

Me three. I think Hiroko's being a pretty big idiot, sure, but I can understand where she's coming from.

Maybe a hot take

A freezing cold take, given that most everybody in this thread but me agrees with you.

Count me in. It's 2 against the world lol.

Me three. I think Hiroko's being a pretty big idiot, sure, but I can understand where she's coming from.

Sal Jiang's art is so good. The emotion is insane. And I really love the direction this is going in. What a treat!

Now if only the bank series would continue so we can have more violence that Sal is quite good at drawing.

senpai has and is a great ass

If Hiroko really wanted Ayaka to stay away, she could stop jerking around with her emotions like this. :/ I feel like Hiroko just enjoys hurting other women, be it by loving and leaving them in the lesbian bar

Hang on a minute. We have no evidence she's hurting anyone at the lesbian bar. I don't think most people being propositioned successfully at a bar are going to be astonished when it's a short term thing. It seems fairly likely that on average she shows people a good time and everyone is more or less satisfied. Promiscuity is not my personal thing, but I've known some ethical people who are absolutely not into hurting anyone (um, metaphorically at least--a bit of S&M maybe) for whom promiscuity was their thing. Sleeping around is not by definition hurtful or evil.

Finding the motivation again.

Ayaka, just find another woman, Hiroko isn't worth it

Poor peanut. Go find another girl to treasure you; no one needs a liar. Sure love a gal in a business suit.

Poor peanut. Go find another girl to treasure you; no one needs a liar.

Truer words were never spoken.

Poor peanut. Go find another girl to treasure you; no one needs a liar. Sure love a gal in a business suit.

Lying to stay in the closet because you're not ready to come out is not the same thing as general dishonesty. This is super unfair and actually pretty goddamned rude.

The problem isn't that she's a liar. The problem is that she's a dumbass. ;p

Poor peanut. Go find another girl to treasure you; no one needs a liar. Sure love a gal in a business suit.

Lying to stay in the closet because you're not ready to come out is not the same thing as general dishonesty. This is super unfair and actually pretty goddamned rude.

There's a difference between considering your position and comfort and deciding you're going to stay in the closet in a private conversation with the gay girl who saw you at the lesbian bar and pushed through her vulnerability to come out to (and onto) you and reflexively lying to her face later.

The latter is what I take issue with. The reflex.

Yeah, I'm not gonna defend her but she definitely has internalized homophobia that she needs to get over. I think because Hiroko is attracted to Ayaka she's afraid of being rejected once Ayaka knows she's gay or something. Like it's worse if she knows she's gay and doesn't go for her? That's why she says she can't picture her with someone else I think. Actually it's really immature lol. She has no excuses XD

I really hope that the company they work for pays for hourly overtime because otherwise Hiroko would be a massive class traitor for suggesting that Ayaka should not only do extra work for free but also enjoy doing it.

Wow...Hiroko behaved like a mature person I think! She even admits she couldn't proudly be a lesbian...I loved this last chapter, it even felt like..real life? Like something someone would actually say...so ,she is cheering for Risa, right? But you can't force feelings, but then again Ayaka barely knew Hiroko...I hope she gives it a try with someone who at least can say she loves her openly! Yaaaay I loved this one!!! No magical nonsensical change of attitude!!

Forget her Ayaka, no one should worth that much effort

She's made comments about it and characters have hinted at it a lot but now she's said it clearly for Ayaka. She really has just decided to remain closeted at work, for obvious reasons and believes (wrongly, I think) that she can't make Ayaka truly happy as a result. She rejected Ayaka nicely, but not fully, since she actually does like her.

Plenty of people unfortunately have to navigate decisions like that when in historically hostile or precarious environments. It's perfectly understandable that she wouldn't trust Ayaka's ability to keep her secret (gay or not) and honestly it's not out of the realm of possibility that Ayaka will still "out her" accidently, even now. She's taking a personal and potentially professional risk, as Ayaka's pretty loud and obvious. It's unfortunate that Ayaka met Hiroko at work because it's clear they would be fine if Ayaka weren't a coworker (or if Japanese, or any, corporate environments didn't breed distrust).

Still, it was a circumstantial rejection, which Ayaka can come back from. Hiroko clearly likes her a lot so it might not be as difficult to recover from as it seems right now. Ayaka will have a lot to think about, indeed.

I did like Risa's force here though. She's putting in the work but she's honestly in the same (but worse) position as Ayaka. At least for Ayaka, Hiroko's issues are only work related. For Risa, Ayaka just isn't romantically interested at all and there's not much coming back from that. She's setting herself up for heartache.

last edited at Jun 15, 2023 1:30PM

For the love of god in heaven, just choose Risa already

Huuum this is interesting

She's made comments about it and characters have hinted at it a lot but now she's said it clearly for Ayaka. She really has just decided to remain closeted at work, for obvious reasons and believes (wrongly, I think) that she can't make Ayaka truly happy as a result. She rejected Ayaka nicely, but not fully, since she actually does like her. Plenty of people unfortunately have to navigate decisions like that when in historically hostile or precarious environments. It's perfectly understandable that she wouldn't trust Ayaka's ability to keep her secret (gay or not) and honestly it's not out of the realm of possibility that Ayaka will still "out her" accidently, even now. She's taking a personal and potentially professional risk, as Ayaka's pretty loud and obvious. It's unfortunate that Ayaka met Hiroko at work because it's clear they would be fine if Ayaka weren't a coworker (or if Japanese, or any, corporate environments didn't breed distrust).

It was a circumstantial rejection, which Ayaka can come back from. Now if she decides to, Ayaka can better strategize about how to work with or around Hiroko's cautious office demeanor or how to maybe persuade Hiroko to loosen those cautious rules a bit. Hiroko clearly likes her a lot so it might not be as difficult as it seems right now. Ayaka will have a lot to think about.

I did like Risa's force here though. She's putting in the work but she's honestly in the same (but worse) position as Ayaka. At least for Ayaka, Hiroko's issues are only work related. For Risa, Ayaka just isn't romantically interested at all and there's not much coming back from that.

This was well written in my opinion, but I don't think Ayaka would have to wait around for Hiroko, nor did she ask her that, I know, but me personally wouldn't be happy dating someone in the closet, I know there are different circumstances in life, but being out since I was 14, I just can't. I'd like a third person to appear, I would say Risa but Ayaka doesn't seem to like her, I just don't feel Hiroko and Ayaka are a good pair now and I hope Ayaka won't insist on it, chasing someone can get really tiresome.

I can respect Hiroko for saying it.
Frankly, I don't support the idea of Risa getting with Ayaka - Risa is too good for her! Besides, Ayaka just doesn't love Risa, which is a shame but cannot be helped - or maybe could but shouldn't.

I would give it a timeskip to change up their circumstances if I were the author. Currently there really is no way for Hiroko and Ayaka to get together "in a good way" - one which won't make the readers feel like they'll break up in a month.

last edited at Jun 15, 2023 1:33PM

This was well written in my opinion, but I don't think Ayaka would have to wait around for Hiroko, nor did she ask her that, I know, but me personally wouldn't be happy dating someone in the closet, I know there are different circumstances in life, but being out since I was 14, I just can't. I'd like a third person to appear, I would say Risa but Ayaka doesn't seem to like her, I just don't feel Hiroko and Ayaka are a good pair now and I hope Ayaka won't insist on it, chasing someone can get really tiresome.

Yeah it's all up to Ayaka. As you said, Hiroko has never been the pursued. Ayaka has always willingly chased Hiroko, despite Hiroko's attempts to create distance. Hiroko, here, gives Ayaka a clear out and explains why. But Ayaka never gets the chance to say whether she's fine with being in a closeted relationship. Ayaka has never expressed any issues with the idea, it's all in Hiroko's head (as usual). Mind you, it would only be a work situation. Outside of work they would be fine. I just don't see Ayaka giving up over something like that. I do agree, Risa is a no go. It all depends on how much Ayaka is determined and she's only shown herself to be super determined. Now she knows the core issue so she's not swinging in the dark, she can break Hiroko down better. Maybe show her she doesn't need to be as afraid (though that's debatable considering the real world).

last edited at Jun 15, 2023 1:38PM

Hiroko is not worth your effort. Risa I support you but it will be hard

Hiroko finally decided to show some maturity. I was so close to giving up on this series.