I'm still not sure if Saki's feelings will be reciprocated or not. On one hand, Kanon is really attached to her, but on the other, it might fit the themes of the story a little better if it's unrequited.

Wow this author is really going for the yuri route. <3

I 100% thought Kanon might have had a ting for the teacher as well in those chapters when she was hanging in the room reading the book with him it just felt weird and awkward.

It's a shame that Saki has not only realized her feelings but at the same time she's wayyy too scared to do anything about it because she doesn't want to prove Kanons stupid sister right that she had ulterior motives getting close to her. The person that's going to have to take the next step here is going to have to be Kanon because Saki wont think otherwise because she seems to think She's now only using Kanon for her own personal gain to get into a relationship with her which is very silly as that was NOT the reason she started hanging out with/helping her in the first place that just happened over time. And clearly with the blushing Kanon did when Saki first grabbed her hand she at least feels sometime for her. We need something more focused on Kanon and her inner thoughts for a chapter to see what she's thinking instead of just Saki imo.

so Saki finally admits she's in love, though given the framing she might still view that as a bad thing because in her mind that means she's somehow taking advantage of Kanon by being by her side.

It would be taking advantage if she had no interest in Kanon without the romantic angle. If the only reason she was being friendly and helping her out was that, it could be seen as a negative thing, a bit like work relationships between a boss and his worker. Yes, she clearly does not intend to, but it is the potential for abuse is the reason such things are frowned upon.

oh yes I certainly agree. Though in trying to understand what Saki is thinking I feel like she is seeing that potential for abuse and in her mind that potential alone is getting equalized to abuse in a way where she feels like she's taking advantage of Kanon literally just because she has the potential to do so, even if she never intends to.

Ultimately thought Saki really deserves to chill out a little because right now she's getting swept up by her own anxieties that are making her view her own actions as predatory/abusive no matter what she's doing, and like that's not good for her. It sucks to feel that way. And she shouldn't because while her anxieties are saying the opposite she's really not taking advantage of Kanon at all.

GAY!

I don't think "taking advantage" is the right way to describe befriending someone because you're romantically interested in them; it's more the concern that a friendship based on false (or unstated) pretenses is inherently unstable. This is a particular concern here because Saki is basically Kanon's only friend; losing her would be a really big blow, and there's a risk of that happening if Saki confesses and gets rejected (or vice versa from Kanon's perspective).

Just befriending, no. Befriending someone with a disability with that sort of ulterior motive CAN be seen as having potential for exploitation.

Saki didn't start out with the goal of falling in love with Kanon, it just happened. So she shouldn't feel as if she had ulterior motives.
Although, I see why she would feel conflicted.

Oof, what Kanon's sister told to Saki is going to be a pebble in her shoe for a while, but I'm glad that at least all this means that Kanon didn't wanted to fuck the teacher (I guess)

[Saki] seems to think She's now only using Kanon for her own personal gain to get into a relationship with her which is very silly as that was NOT the reason she started hanging out with/helping her in the first place that just happened over time.

I disagree with this tbh. I think Saki started crushing on Kanon from the moment they met, and that's why she put so much effort into befriending her. (Well that and she was lonely and heartbroken.) If Kanon weren't as pretty as she is, it's unclear whether Saki would've put in as much effort as she did. I don't say this as a criticism of the character, it's normal to try harder to get close to people you have a crush on... that's just kind of how it is.

I don't think "taking advantage" is the right way to describe befriending someone because you're romantically interested in them; it's more the concern that a friendship based on false (or unstated) pretenses is inherently unstable. This is a particular concern here because Saki is basically Kanon's only friend; losing her would be a really big blow, and there's a risk of that happening if Saki confesses and gets rejected (or vice versa from Kanon's perspective).

Just befriending, no. Befriending someone with a disability with that sort of ulterior motive CAN be seen as having potential for exploitation.

That's fair. We've seen that, especially when they go outside Kanon's house, Kanon is a lot more dependent on Saki than the other way around. If Saki were a bad person, she might be able to coerce Kanon into a relationship by using the implicit threat of leaving her if Kanon refuses.

She finally bloomed into her hehehehehehehehehehe

And clearly with the blushing Kanon did when Saki first grabbed her hand she at least feels sometime for her. We need something more focused on Kanon...

I'm of a similar opinion; Kanon's feelings toward Saki are definitely romantic to some degree, and her attachment otherwise could very easily be confused as such. And I'd definitely like to delve a bit into Kanon's head, but I think a big part of the story is exactly that we can't really do that in real life, we can only try and understand (them) from where we stand both as individuals and as a whole.

What to me really stood out this chapter was Kanon's point about hurting and being hurt in any sort of dynamic. A good chunk of my life I've been living feeling like I'm walking on thin ice, specifically in the context of interpersonal dynamics. Constantly feeling guilty and/or undeserving and needing to apologize for everything or anything, and almost completely castrating myself and shutting myself away, and that is rough. Took me years to only start to understand exactly what Kanon is saying here, and that specifically there will be something I do that may or may not be hurtful to those I care about, and that isn't the end of the world. Hell, I'm pretty certain I've had a conversation like this with my therapist almost verbatim.

Trying to do this without projecting too much, but some of Saki's actions and behaviors hit way too close to home for me. Way too similar to how I've been in some of my worst times, even not too long ago. Girl's way too stuck within the confines of her own head to actually do, see, or experience anything. Thinking about it, I really like how Kanon balances some of these parts of Saki in their dynamic and reins in some of Saki's judge, jury, and executioner tendencies.

Three smaller anecdotes:
- I'd lie if I said I wasn't afraid of the possibility, but I never really thought that the teacher would be anything than a supporting character (and actually a surprisingly great one at that), but it definitely is kinda nice to explicitly see those lilies taking root. Now go big. Do not go home.
- On top of her other issues, I think that Saki is stuck on just how stupidly adorable Kanon can be and how hard that fucks her up, and in itself, it's actually really cute in my opinion.
- Kanon's smug, teasing smile on page 32 is astonishingly beautiful. Fantastic artwork for that.

Saki's dealing with internalized homophobia. Queer attraction is seen as inherently predatory and deceptive, because it's romantic/sexual feelings coming from someone who is "supposed" to be "safe" from such things.

Thus, by becoming Kanon's friend while also having a crush on her, Saki feels like she's doing something wrong because Kanon is theoretically only expecting her to be a friend, and not a potential romantic partner.

It's also why it's so easy to dismiss Kanon's expressions of intimacy and trust toward Saki as being platonic, and not a signal of romantic interest. Even we as readers often use a different set of standards when it comes to same-gender and different-gender interactions.

Kanon actually kind of pushes back against this view, interestingly enough, when she points out how annoying it is to assume that being interested in a (male) actor's work or a (male) teacher's knowledge must automatically mean she is attracted to them.

Of course, this also means we can't assume that Kanon is into Saki just because she likes her so much. I mean, I'd like to believe that blush when Saki takes her hand is a sign, but I'm sure the drama will be milked for a while as Saki squirms, heh. I'm glad we at least got 100% confirmation that she's in love with Kanon!

Oh my golf, kuzushiro is back to create yuri :0

Man Saki is so damn hard on herself in a way that I don’t think we ever really get in romance series. Most romantic leads have a tragic past that makes them emotionally distant or hard on themselves, meanwhile hurricane Saki is over here like “I’m such a piece of shit for liking this girl” and overthinks every damn thing.

This series main focus on disabilities and internalized homophobia are so unique and frankly refreshing, I hope no editorial issues get in its way. The creator deserves to do what they want for as along as they want with this title

But man do I walk away from every chapter feeling stressed and bad for Saki, she needs help or something lol

last edited at Sep 2, 2022 11:34PM

Got a bad case of the gaaaaays

This subtext is so much no longer subtext that it's a domme now

last edited at Sep 3, 2022 12:10AM

Finally the scanlation caught up with the tankoubon.

I'm not sure who can take the next step. Kanon has been dropping hints left and right. Now Saki also realized that she herself wants to be more than just friends.
The problem is, what does ulterior motives mean? If it is love, then it automatically get immunity. What Kanon sister concerns is, people will pretend to "help" Kanon, and expected to gain a good reputation. It does not apply to Saki, she has nothing to gain from being in a relationship with Kanon. Plus she is Kanon's mom's student. That gives Saki a place of the inside circle of Kanon.

Ok, but what if Saki was male, and he likes his friend in a romantic way? What would you call it? Would it be wrong of him to keep the friendship while wanting something more? If yes, what should he should do?

I just wanna put it here since I don't think I have a friend I could talk to about this manga or any other stuff I read in general

I just thought that maybe "the moon on a rainy night" to Saki would be Kanon's feeling for her, like she won't see it easily because of all the things she deals with within herself (I don't know what it's called but I saw comments saying its internalized homophobia)

And yeah that is all I wanted to say. Sorry hahahaha!
I've been reading mangas here but this is the first time I'm writing a comment.
I also realized i can't use emojis here hahaha

last edited at Sep 3, 2022 5:02AM

This manga shows off the thought process for "the MC is triggered by a bad topic, has to switch mental gears, adopt a fake smile, and soldier on through the conversation while trying to find an exit" better than anything I've ever seen, even in novels. It is so relatable for me. Being trans, there's several topics that would I never want to think about, nevermind talk about, but sometimes conversations go there anyway, and the kind of mental agony of it is something you rarely see expressed in fiction, especially this well.

The amount of people feeling called out on the teacher thing only 100% proves the point Kanon is making - there was almost no basis for her having "a thing for the teacher" in the story, and people in real life are similarly obnoxious about that kind of stuff.

last edited at Sep 3, 2022 5:47AM

there was almost no basis for her having "a thing for the teacher" in the story

That's an exaggeration. Kanon doesn't like to eat with others, including Saki, but she was happy to eat with Miura. Then in chapter 6, she blushes when he's behind her and her face is shadowed when she learns he's a widower. None of this was definitive, obviously, but hints were there, and I'd be surprised if they weren't deliberately planted.

there was almost no basis for her having "a thing for the teacher" in the story

That's an exaggeration. Kanon doesn't like to eat with others, including Saki, but she was happy to eat with Miura. Then in chapter 6, she blushes when he's behind her and her face is shadowed when she learns he's a widower. None of this was definitive, obviously, but hints were there, and I'd be surprised if they weren't deliberately planted.

I dunno, that all does sound like "almost no basis" to me. I really disagree that this is an exaggeration, and I don't think these reactions were some kind of master plan on the part of the author just to tell you "gotcha" in this newest chapter. It's just a high school girl being flustered by a teacher previously perceived as strict helping her out to fit in. Maybe it's easier getting fooled like that because this author just draws exaggerated expressions all over the place (and well, while reading fiction people naturally assume that everything presented to them matters in some way), but I think it reflects behaviour of some people in real life pretty well and maybe that's what the author had in mind in this newest chapter (or maybe it's just a dig on some comments the author saw after previous chapters, but I don't know if this was originally published in parts or not). I could be all wrong of course, but this is how I choose to interpret it.

The amount of people feeling called out on the teacher thing only 100% proves the point Kanon is making - there was almost no basis for her having "a thing for the teacher" in the story, and people in real life are similarly obnoxious about that kind of stuff.

The fact that she called out Saki and the audience proves that the narrative itself expected people to come to this conclusion. This is a story, so it is only natural the audience reacts to story conventions, and those conventions very much did imply Kanon might have a crush on the teacher. The fact that the story later actively and explicitly pushed back against said conventions doesn't change the fact it used them deliberately to create an effect. The point that the story as proving is not that the audience is stupid, but that basic narrative conventions are often bullshit and heteronominative.

last edited at Sep 3, 2022 8:51AM

I already said this (quote) before as a reply to someone's reply to people pondering about Kanon's attraction to the teacher,

In ch6, the lil sister mentioned people who keep on misunderstanding her sister's facial expressions (behavior), I'm not sure if that's a call out to those readers from the author.

It IS a call out to those readers, that was already the first (lil sis called those who do think like this as idiots) and the author's been baiting readers exactly for this chapter. With the little interaction she had with the teacher, some readers concluded that she likes the teacher but not Saki with their many interactions. Even after this chapter, some are still adamant that she likes Saki just as well.

Edit: I wouldn't be surprised if the author will have another chapter where they call out these adamant readers in the future.
Edit: It would be really funny if the lil sister again will deliver the idiot line to Saki for misunderstanding Kanon's feelings for her. Since this manga portrays the lil sis as good at reading non-verbal language, there's high probability that the she will eventually know the two's feelings for each other, even before Saki will know about Kanon's.

last edited at Sep 3, 2022 9:58AM

A revelation!

Weren't the stick people all supposed to get one box in the first panel of that drawing and then the whole point was about redistributing the boxes equitably? Like, where did the boxes come from teach?

What are you even talking about? This has nothing to do with something as simple as redistributing existing assets like you do with taxes. It's about creating new aids for those who need them. For example, the subtitle glasses mentioned in the chapter. You don't need to take anything away from people who don't need these, they never had them nor asked for them in the first place. But they do make a significant difference for those who do require their help to enjoy the same things.

last edited at Sep 3, 2022 9:39AM