Hasn't she been in this universe for years? That's a lot of preconditioning, insecurity and suffering (like, from loneliness for example. she has mentioned that a lot of times). "Evie 'the neutron star'" isn't right, I think. There is real fear that the system could do something very bad, like bring death (and I think she said that in an earlier chapter?).
She's probably been and thought through this stuff so much that is has become habit, and sometimes a defense mechanism. I think she is at least slightly messed up. At some point, I think she half-heartedly adopted a new mindset that has some of the game's logic, to keep some of her sanity. And, fortunately, I think that mindset is now slowly falling away for something better.
We are also not getting the full story from a god-like narrator, but from the characters themselves. There is a lot more to learn, and we will learn as the characters do. Especially of themselves.
last edited at Apr 26, 2022 1:11AM