^
I agree with Nevri’s criticism of the story structure, but it’s worth pointing out that most of the sad past, marriage through obligation, etc. (i.e., all the non-Uta’s-unrequited-love stuff) was there from the very beginning or close to it.

So it’s not like the drama comes out of nowhere (as often happens when stories are desperate for some plot-twist energy), but more like the author started out with all those threads and then has developed them very sporadically and erratically.

It’s the abortive confrontations—the “let me ask you something—no, never mind,” the heart-to-heart talk interrupted by a phone call, the faked amnesia, and so forth—that really make me feel like the author doesn’t quite know what to do with the overall story.

And yeah, the way that confession business was handled is a real puzzler—I have no idea what structuring the reveal that way was supposed to accomplish.

Blastaar posted:

it’s worth pointing out that most of the sad past, marriage through obligation, etc. (i.e., all the non-Uta’s-unrequited-love stuff) was there from the very beginning or close to it.

I didn't mean to imply they added it in as story progressed. Rather it feels like they came up with Uta's unrequited love idea first, but then either started to fiddle further with story and adding more stuff to make it more complex or simply didn't think just that would be compelling enough and make for good/interesting/long story. The "mystery" was here from the start, because that was the setting they came up with in the end, but at first focus was only on Uta's love story. I could write it clearer, so my bad.

last edited at Sep 28, 2018 11:45AM

Blastaar posted:

it’s worth pointing out that most of the sad past, marriage through obligation, etc. (i.e., all the non-Uta’s-unrequited-love stuff) was there from the very beginning or close to it.

I didn't mean to imply they added it in as story progressed. Rather it feels like they came up with Uta's unrequited love idea first, but then either started to fiddle further with story and adding more stuff to make it more complex or simply didn't think just that would be compelling enough and make for good/interesting/long story. The "mystery" was here from the start, because that was the setting they came up with in the end, but at first focus was only on Uta's love story. I could write it clearer, so my bad.

The sudden dramatic changes and twists that started being added to what had originally been a very slow paced but complex story about subtle character interactions has the stink of editorial meddling all over it. I think what we are seeing here is the end result of the mangaka being pressured by her editor and the magazine higher ups to make her story more exiting and dramatic like their flagship Citrus series was. Once it was clear Citrus was coming to a close a think they decided they wanted this series to try and fill its shoes despite the fact that it is really a very different kind of story regardless of the obvious thematic similarities. I think that's why we are now getting these sudden dramatic cliff hangers most chapters, which the mangaka then immediately backs out of because it doesn't fit all the storytelling and pacing that has been built to this point.

Only the mangaka really knows what is going on with the sudden changes in her story telling style, but I am friends with a writer and when ever I have see puzzling changes in their story telling style like this in their own work it almost always turns out to be due to outside pressuring by the people she works for. The goals of an author and the people trying to profit off of their work are often not the same. The people in charge of Yuri Hime are there to sell magazines rather than to tell a good story and it is sad but true that pulpy dramas with constant dramatic twists and cliff hangers sell more copy than more subtle and complex slow burn stories.

last edited at Sep 28, 2018 12:59PM

@Nevri and @Looking East

I take your points. I brought up the “there from the start” thing just to emphasize how this series was potentially rather conflicted about its main focus from the beginning, but that fuzziness only became clear as various elements were picked up and dropped without a lot of apparent reasons for how, when, and why. And yeah, I guess I do tend to blame (or credit) the named author of a series for a given story’s narrative choices, and just forget that there’s editorial pressure and the economics of serialization at work as well.

But as another one of those puzzlers, it’s obvious that the character of Kuro was meant to give Uta someone to talk to and also to serve as a rather cynical foil to Uta’s romanticizing of love. But what the business with Miyabi and the sex-girl is supposed to contribute (besides more unrequited love in general) I don’t know.

I still am basically interested in these characters, and I like the art style (that includes the occasional odd body proportions) and even some of the staging of individual scenes, but although I keep hoping that the story will get “better,” whenever it shows signs of doing so it seems to just become “more” of what it’s been like all along.

But as another one of those puzzlers, it’s obvious that the character of Kuro was meant to give Uta someone to talk to and also to serve as a rather cynical foil to Uta’s romanticizing of love. But what the business with Miyabi and the sex-girl is supposed to contribute (besides more unrequited love in general) I don’t know.

I wonder if this will turn into a harem story, are all these girls going to fall in love with Uta or? xD

Because yeah, not sure at all why they are even in the story. I thought actually that sex-girl was having sex with Kuro behind Miyabi's back. Wouldn't be surprised given Kuro's acid personality, but then it turns out nope, they are just friends and it was done to cause more empty misunderstandings. I have to agree although lots of things are going on in the story, nothing meaningful ever comes out of them.

when did Uta-chan tell Kaoru how she felt? I don't remember reading it.

Roshi710 posted:

when did Uta-chan tell Kaoru how she felt? I don't remember reading it.

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/my_unrequited_love_ch14#32
https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/my_unrequited_love_ch17#2

I put off on reading this a while ago (I think the hot springs chapter) and came back to what feels like an even bigger mess, but I can't say I hate it. The chapter where their mom showed up out of nowhere was very interesting - revealing she was involved in Kaoru's mom passing, why she's never around and a little about their father. Considering Uta says "he is the way he is because of you" I wonder if we'll be seeing him any time soon. He is apparently on board with taking Uta in as long as he and their mom get an official divorce, so I'm really curious about what kind of person he is.

I really wish we had seen how the confession went or what Kaoru's actual reaction was. Uta says she just smiled, but considering how she hesitated and looked really unnerved when Uta asked her if she really was okay with letting Uta stay despite knowing her feelings and then emphasizing that she considers her important family, there has to have been more to it. Knowing Reiichi is probably cheating and now his little sister loves her, did she feel like her ideal life was falling apart? Other than those two I don't think she has anyone else to go to if things truly go south, so maybe she's trying to keep things from getting to that point by letting things like cheating and even a confession slip by.

There are still a lot of interesting things going on, but one thing I can say I really dislike is how often we go back and waste so much time on Kuro and Miyabi's drama. On her own, Kuro is a pretty cool character and I like how she's blunt when it comes to giving Uta advice or asking what's on her mind. But when it comes to scenes with her and Miyabi or Konatsu I just can't enjoy it, and I wish we'd stop going back to give their dating-but-it's-complicated-so-not-really situation focus when it doesn't really contribute anything to the main story.

So, pretty effectively told (albeit fairly generic) scenes revealing the unsurprising past of a marginal character, leading up to a vaguely cliffhanger-ish suggestion that . . . something or other . . .with the main character might happen in the future.

So kind of the archetypal chapter for this one.

godddddd i dont know how someone could survive going through what that girl did
i wouldnt

Gaaawd I want the main story !

Godddddd (xD) can we please get some of the main story already?

These body proportions are insane. Damn.

That was somewhat interesting. I'm not really sure why she didn't say it was Nogami and that she was rescuing the nurse, but whatever.

Is it a common opinion that Kuroe's subplot is deeply uninteresting, by the way? The entire relationship she has has always felt forced. I liked Kuroe initially, but the girl who likes her is incredibly boring and rather pushy and nothing about the way it's going is compelling at all. Actively sours my enjoyment of the series.

That credits panel made my fucking day.

That was somewhat interesting. I'm not really sure why she didn't say it was Nogami and that she was rescuing the nurse, but whatever.

Is it a common opinion that Kuroe's subplot is deeply uninteresting, by the way? The entire relationship she has has always felt forced. I liked Kuroe initially, but the girl who likes her is incredibly boring and rather pushy and nothing about the way it's going is compelling at all. Actively sours my enjoyment of the series.

Kuroe was fine when she was the one person who Uta could talk to about her situation, someone who didn't have even a theoretical stake in the whole romance game. (I.e., the classic interlocutor role in narrative.)

When the other people came along that subplot became like a different manga where Uta could go hang out and kill time since nothing can actually happen in the main one.

Edit: nuyari said pretty much the same thing a few posts above mine.

last edited at Oct 21, 2018 5:57PM

I actually wanted to hear her story for awhile :/

So when does the Nurse get her happy ending?

Hmm

That credits panel made my fucking day.

It made my night.

Hah. Has the story advanced at all since the confession? I wonder what the chances str of a follow-up confession in the next chap.

Huh. I’ve had to re-read the hook-up bit several times to understand exactly what transpired between the two. It appears to be misunderstood intentions gone astray.

Anyways, the student ends up getting hosed and exposed while the teacher (ahem—nurse) gets off free and clean. I can’t think of how the student could have salvaged the situation with the cards stacked against her. I’m surprised her parents haven’t applied the screws to her when her grades were getting bad (as in finding out root cause for falling grades and nipping the relationship off at the bud). The nurse saved her career and held onto a lousy husband—I’d call that even.

The credits panel was great—really helps break a depressing mood. I sense the scanlation team is wishing the story stops digressing and continuing on with the resolution of the story.

I dunno I quite liked this chapter though I hope that the next one will actually move the story forward

So finally something happened, after 19 freakin chapters. Except it’s not with the main couple smh

i wanted to do my hs teacher
but she was being done by some other student
now ill never get to do that kind of thing :(

last edited at Oct 22, 2018 4:17AM by