ForumIt's Tough Being Neeko discussion

Hotyangicon3
joined Jun 6, 2013

This manga is just a string of Neeko's humilations. And it looks like it's going to go on and on, until she somehow finds a job and joins the norm. Then it'll be over.

It's not fun at all.

I mean life isn't fun at all so... life imitating art and vice versa and all that.

Nobody's ever gonna make me believe that this girl will ever have money problems.

Okay. I know this is meant as a joke, but it's not very funny.

Very little about this manga is genuinely funny, actually. Not for someone who suffers similarly, at least.

I hate that I relate so closely to her, it's painful. The more I read this, the more I wonder how much longer it'll be before she starts contemplating suicide. Every time she does something good, it comes crashing down at the end. Yes, she went out to a festival. That's great, getting out of the house is great. Then she got separated from her sister, and, upon reuniting with her, was humiliated. It's not just about making steps forward, because there's steps back as well, and those always feel more significant.

I've suffered like her for so very long, and after a long enough time it becomes impossible to remember what it was like when I didn't feel this horrible, and impossible to imagine a future where it isn't this way.

I'm not sure how many people here are like me, it seems like there's at least a handful of others with similar experiences. But when you've suffered so greatly for so long, you start to believe that it's normal. I was speaking with a doctor recently for a brief medical history interview (because I moved and have to get all that shit sorted out) and when I was asked about depression, my sentence ended with something along the lines of "but that's life, right?" and when she responded with "It doesn't have to be." I was overwhelmed. I had genuinely come to believe that I was going to feel like the worst piece of shit on earth for the rest of my life, and that was what was proper and meant to be. Even now I find it hard to believe I'll ever feel better, but I try to remember what she said to give myself some hope.

I'm 29, and the past 15 or so years of my life have been spent trying to find a way to allow me to feel normal. I've tried medication after medication, but nothing seems to work well enough to get me out of the downward spiral I've been in over those 15 years. After a long enough time of getting worse, you stop believing it can get better. It doesn't matter what merits you might have, or what other people see in you. It doesn't matter if you're smart or attractive or anything else someone might want.

The worst part of it all is that it's incredibly difficult to get other people to understand. When you feel suicidal, you don't want to tell anyone because you're scared of how they'll react. And if you do tell someone, your fears are realized, because nobody expects someone to want to be dead. I can't even begin to describe what it's like to go from admitting to someone you love that you're having suicidal thoughts, to having to do damage control for telling them that. It's the worst. You've told someone that you need help, but instead you have to help them not worry about it? It's a catch 22. If you admit to how bad you feel, you make other people feel bad.

I apologize for the giant post, and the likely incoherent rambling. I needed to get that off my chest, and hopefully it will help at least one person who doesn't get it better understand what it's like to be like Neeko. I know I shouldn't read this if it makes me unhappy, but there aren't a lot of places that you can see people like yourself when you have mental health problems, because nobody wants to think about them (and I can't blame anyone for that, I wish I had no reason to think about them either).

Thanks for sharing SushiKnight. I'm similar and am 30. Only reason I'm not suicidal is because of a near-death experience book that I've read, and just like... people don't really know how to react to you wanting to die so... I dunno. I'm slowly going insane with loneliness. Not sure when enough will be enough.

I've had some upward spirals over the last 15 years, but my endeavors fail and I just get more and more heart broken.

last edited at Aug 1, 2020 3:28AM

Tfwubestgirl
joined Aug 16, 2015

It's not just about making steps forward, because there's steps back as well, and those always feel more significant.

Only if you let them.

I know that sounds arrogant of me to say, but I only say it because I spent around half of my current life with that exact mindset.

"What's the point in trying when everything just turns out shitty anyways?"

"Why live when there's so much more bad than good?"

I grappled with questions like these for so long, and it eventually got to a point where I fantasized about ending my life in various ways on a daily basis for several years straight.

"Why not just end it now if I'm going to spend my entire life suffering and then die anyways?"

I would get so frustrated with myself that I was too incapable to go through with my fantasies... There's no cure-all approach that will work for everyone, obviously, but a concept that really helped me reach a healthier mindset was the idea that pain isn't this terrible thing that must be avoided at all costs to live a "happy" life. People can live through pain and grow from it, but only if they give themselves a chance. And yeah, that's easier said than done, and I don't know what you've been through before, but I know that both you and I have gone through some shit, and we're still standing here. There came a point where I just realized, "Hey, I can survive the torture of my own mind. I've done it for years. What is there to be so afraid of then?" Gradually things started to feel a little easier after that.

Every time she does something good, it comes crashing down at the end. Yes, she went out to a festival. That's great, getting out of the house is great. Then she got separated from her sister, and, upon reuniting with her, was humiliated.

So she got separated from her sister. No big deal. They were quickly reunited; nothing to worry over. And she was humiliated. In front of some random highschoolers and old friends from middle school that she almost never interacts with? Who cares? I'd argue that Neeko has four, maybe three, people that actually matter in her life: Her parents, Imoko, and maybe now Uri. And all of those people still love and support her, even knowing the things she was "humiliated" over in the first place.

That night Neeko had a ton of fun spending time with a person she loves and is loved by. There were some small bumps, but I'd say she's doing pretty good if she's still able to admit to herself that she was having fun (there was a few years where I was/am convinced that I hadn't felt any positive emotions in that time span, and felt isolated as the important people in my life were either coincidentally depressed as well, living very far away and in low contact, or deceased).


Well, that's a lot of rambling from me, and I hope it didn't come off as if I was trying to preach my beliefs, because that wasn't my intention. I'm not trying to belittle anyone's struggles, tell anyone to think the way I do, or anything like that. Rather, I just meant this as a response to the comments saying things like,

This manga isn't enjoyable

or

It's not funny for people that actually relate

Because I can relate some of my past experiences to Neeko, and feel like I can even relate to the present sometimes as well, but to me this manga has been about watching Neeko grow, and I think if you go back to the beginning and pay close attention, you will see that Neeko has been growing, ever so slightly but steadily. And I think that's because Neeko hasn't been letting her steps back be more significant. She does sometimes take some steps back, but overall her steps in the other direction have been even marginally larger, and in the end that's how you move forward.

Runrin-icon-wrd-2
joined Feb 9, 2019

i finally managed to pawn this series off on another editor. :P
i hope neeko can continue to be honest with urei, instead of getting into some weird watamote situation...

Utenaanthy01
joined Aug 4, 2018

Yaay! More Neeko!

Haha, there was nothing "shameful" in her interview, she shouldn't be so embarrassed.

And Imoko wants to get married in the future? Hmm...

I wonder if there are countries in the world that allow a girl to marry her sister?

last edited at Sep 9, 2020 7:39PM

This
joined Jan 17, 2017

Neeko should become a Vtuber at this point tbh.

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joined Apr 19, 2018

Well, we didn't have Olympics, so there's that

joined Jul 23, 2019

I wonder if there are countries in the world that allow a girl to marry her sister?

Shima from Her Elder Sister Has a Crush on Her, But She Doesn't Mind also wants to know.

"I think we should destroy the darkness that is box gacha!"

Mai from Her Elder Sister Has a Crush on Her, But She Doesn't Mind wants to have a word with Urei.

Zigv3uyqlg0hih2ixcp8saivs99g-ehejzp51vcc89w
joined Feb 8, 2018

It's been almost 3 years since chapter 1 and I feel this is going nowhere for now. I'd be glad to be wrong, but in my eyes, everything that was happening in the past, carried almost nothing into further chapters.

joined Apr 6, 2019

Ok I'll bite and ask: what's with this color page that shows the same scene as page 1 only it's winter instead of summer and everyone is in winter clothes? It doesn't look like a flashback...

Runrin-icon-wrd-2
joined Feb 9, 2019

Ok I'll bite and ask: what's with this color page that shows the same scene as page 1 only it's winter instead of summer and everyone is in winter clothes? It doesn't look like a flashback...

it's a bonus page we added, i'm not sure where it came from, but i will try to find out for you.

_20180228_203946
joined Jan 24, 2018

Ok I'll bite and ask: what's with this color page that shows the same scene as page 1 only it's winter instead of summer and everyone is in winter clothes? It doesn't look like a flashback...

it's a bonus page we added, i'm not sure where it came from, but i will try to find out for you.

We don't deserve you runrin, you're too good for us. Bless you and your kindness

joined Aug 21, 2017

Fun chapter.

This manga is just a string of Neeko's humilations. And it looks like it's going to go on and on, until she somehow finds a job and joins the norm. Then it'll be over.

It's not fun at all.


Very little about this manga is genuinely funny, actually. Not for someone who suffers similarly, at least.
I hate that I relate so closely to her, it's painful.


Thanks for sharing SushiKnight. I'm similar and am 30. Only reason I'm not suicidal is because of a near-death experience book that I've read, and just like... people don't really know how to react to you wanting to die so... I dunno. I'm slowly going insane with loneliness. Not sure when enough will be enough.


So she got separated from her sister. No big deal. They were quickly reunited; nothing to worry over. And she was humiliated. In front of some random highschoolers and old friends from middle school that she almost never interacts with? Who cares? I'd argue that Neeko has four, maybe three, people that actually matter in her life: Her parents, Imoko, and maybe now Uri. And all of those people still love and support her, even knowing the things she was "humiliated" over in the first place.

I agree. It's natural to feel like shit when you mess up, the trick is to forgive yourself. "Yah I made a mistake. What, am I the devil just cause I sometimes fuck up? No big deal."

IMO part of the reason why this manga manages to be both painful and grueling is because that's basically what having depression is like. It's so repetitive, and it feels like shit all the time. Just constant self-hate.

IDK if this is helpful "advice", but I like to go outside every time my head is messy. I stare at the plants until I feel better. Really just take a fat moment to look at them. I've also heard of really paying attention to the smell, taste, feel, etc. of an orange. Same idea I guess. Instead of dreading the future or shitting yourself up over the past, just really pay attention to right now. I think it helps a little.

Utenaanthy01
joined Aug 4, 2018

Ok I'll bite and ask: what's with this color page that shows the same scene as page 1 only it's winter instead of summer and everyone is in winter clothes? It doesn't look like a flashback...

it's a bonus page we added, i'm not sure where it came from, but i will try to find out for you.

We don't deserve you runrin, you're too good for us. Bless you and your kindness

+1

420e065dfd1a4d6b3655ec2b8f710afc%20(1)
joined Apr 25, 2020

I wonder if there are countries in the world that allow a girl to marry her sister?

I was about to say "sorry to everyone who isn't like me, but maaan, I just want Neeko x Imoko to happen. Just a little kiss please". It's really nice to see someone else thinks the same :')

Runrin-icon-wrd-2
joined Feb 9, 2019

Ok I'll bite and ask: what's with this color page that shows the same scene as page 1 only it's winter instead of summer and everyone is in winter clothes? It doesn't look like a flashback...

it's a bonus page we added, i'm not sure where it came from, but i will try to find out for you.

ok... the colored page is actually development/promotional art from before neeko was serialized. that's where a lot of the bonus, colored ecchi pages come from that we include from time to time. in this case, the page was nearly the same, so we chose to put it in the chapter.

joined Jul 15, 2016

It's been almost 3 years since chapter 1 and I feel this is going nowhere for now. I'd be glad to be wrong, but in my eyes, everything that was happening in the past, carried almost nothing into further chapters.

The high concept of this manga is basically "let's point fingers at Neeko's mental problems and laugh", so of course there is no development -- if she made any progress, the story would be over.

No disrespect to the translator's work, but I must admit, I read these chapters on fast-forward by now. And the only reason I still do is a vague hope that when the series eventually gets axed, the author will be gracious enough to give Neeko some kind of healthy resolution.

last edited at Sep 10, 2020 3:55AM

American_virgin
joined May 25, 2014

I read this series as being about how self-defeating major depression is, packaged with boobs, because those sell better than pure depression.

You see how much Neeko's family loves her, they never want to hurt her, and they wants her to do well. But you can see how they feel helpless, knowing that they can't just fix her because mental health is complicated, even though the solutions are obvious (just do the things you should be doing). They are willing to go to bat for her often, even though it's thankless.

joined Nov 14, 2013

Neeko has also exhibited development through the series as well - in this latest chapter she still went around to interview people with Urei and Imouko without being tricked into it, which is something she never would have done at the start of the manga, plus the video editing skills she picked up are starting to pay some dividends and she's both able to speak frankly about her worries with Urei as well as get snarky about her mother's efforts in front of others.

The development is slow no question, but that's honestly true to life for someone in Neeko's situation.

Felixwtf-min
joined Jun 4, 2018

I really hope when this ends she gets some real help. Her mom meddles in ways that hinder her more than help, her father looks the other way, clearly caring about her but unable to actually do anything for her, and her sister time after time "inadvertently" finding ways to either humiliate her or make her feel genuinely uncomfortable. (I'm using the largest of possible air quotes here, I'm genuinely starting to think she enjoys messing with Neeko)

I have no doubt in my mind that her family loves her, I just wish they'd realize maybe she needs some actual help, with people trained to deal with these things. I get mental health issues is like a huge taboo in Japan, but it's really hard to read. Each time I read a new chapter I have this vain hope that it's going to end with her in a place better than she was before, and it always ends up worse or on the same line.

_20180228_203946
joined Jan 24, 2018

Ok I'll bite and ask: what's with this color page that shows the same scene as page 1 only it's winter instead of summer and everyone is in winter clothes? It doesn't look like a flashback...

it's a bonus page we added, i'm not sure where it came from, but i will try to find out for you.

ok... the colored page is actually development/promotional art from before neeko was serialized. that's where a lot of the bonus, colored ecchi pages come from that we include from time to time. in this case, the page was nearly the same, so we chose to put it in the chapter.

That's some extremely bonus content! How does one even acquire such treasure?

_20180228_203946
joined Jan 24, 2018

I really hope when this ends she gets some real help. Her mom meddles in ways that hinder her more than help, her father looks the other way, clearly caring about her but unable to actually do anything for her, and her sister time after time "inadvertently" finding ways to either humiliate her or make her feel genuinely uncomfortable. (I'm using the largest of possible air quotes here, I'm genuinely starting to think she enjoys messing with Neeko)

I have no doubt in my mind that her family loves her, I just wish they'd realize maybe she needs some actual help, with people trained to deal with these things. I get mental health issues is like a huge taboo in Japan, but it's really hard to read. Each time I read a new chapter I have this vain hope that it's going to end with her in a place better than she was before, and it always ends up worse or on the same line.

I think she is the only one who can help herself, bit by bit, building self confidence and just putting herself out there in scenarios out of her little safe space, I'm sure she'll find her way. It seems a bit extreme how her family treats her, but wrapping her in cotton and babying her won't help her at all, they are all she has and she's a good person for trying for their sake as well, that's how it is with family. Ganbare Neeko!

Darin
joined Jul 13, 2015

She don`t need marry if she her own sister

Runrin-icon-wrd-2
joined Feb 9, 2019

I read this series as being about how self-defeating major depression is, packaged with boobs, because those sell better than pure depression.

You see how much Neeko's family loves her, they never want to hurt her, and they wants her to do well. But you can see how they feel helpless, knowing that they can't just fix her because mental health is complicated, even though the solutions are obvious (just do the things you should be doing). They are willing to go to bat for her often, even though it's thankless.

this is exactly how i feel about this comic.

you can tell if people were drawn in by the ecchi or the plot in the comments. they either share heartfelt, personal experiences with depression, or say "LoL JuST Be A cAM wHOrE And GEt RiCH! Don'T You KNoW LiFe iS SuPEr EaSY foR HoT GiRLs?! AnD YOu WoN't Be DEprEssEd If YoU HaVe MoNEy!!"

mental health issues suck. i've been on both sides of it:

  • it sucks for the depressed person knowing that your family is upset because they can't help you. you feel like you are disappointing them, even though you are trying your best.

  • it sucks for the family, helplessly watching their loved one become a shell of who they once were, no matter how hard you try to help them.

neeko's parents are super believable. her dad willing to give her anything she wants hoping that it will make her even a little happy. her mom trying to give her tough love, hoping she will land on her feet if she takes the plunge.

what neeko really needs are some doctors...

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