Forum › The Marriage Partner of My Dreams Turned Out To Be… My Female Junior at Work?! discussion

Images
joined Sep 20, 2016

oooh spicyyy also okada best boy!

Img_20190914_203449_543
joined Apr 14, 2020

Okada-san Wingman of the year

saltyslug5561
Yvo0lylulbwzixjblrxj
joined May 12, 2020

"It is mostly my fault though."

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

Seriously what is it with this trend in manga, victimized women blaming the themselves?

__fujiwara_no_mokou_and_houraisan_kaguya_touhou_drawn_by_ootsuki_wataru__abfa356e1066a80ad94144d78ad40e5f%20-%20copia
joined Sep 22, 2019

"It is mostly my fault though."

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

Seriously what is it with this trend in manga, victimized women blaming the themselves?

It's especially jarring in this situation since the actual guilty party is clearly aware that it's her who was in the wrong and immediately declares it to be her fault and apologizes for acting like a scumbag.

And then the victim just, ignores all of that and immediately starts blaming herself? Which doesn't say great things about her mental wellbeing.

NightmareWeeb
Shiro
joined Oct 12, 2020

OUR GUY
OUR GUY
OUR GUY

03fca6214046e15b1cbd7ed7cd767b1a
joined May 26, 2020

I understand shiina, I'm still considered quite young but I feel like I'm running out of time when it comes to figuring out what I want and that kinda overwhelms me at night

riverFlower Uploader
The Golden Orchid
joined Jan 19, 2017

Like how the tropes get deployed and then minimized, like with the car accident thing. Just little reminders of why those tropes even exist in the first place. Not really sure how well it'll wrap up though, but just along for the ride.

The immaculate
joined Mar 19, 2020

Damn okada what a bro

The immaculate
joined Mar 19, 2020

"It is mostly my fault though."

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

Seriously what is it with this trend in manga, victimized women blaming the themselves?

It's especially jarring in this situation since the actual guilty party is clearly aware that it's her who was in the wrong and immediately declares it to be her fault and apologizes for acting like a scumbag.

And then the victim just, ignores all of that and immediately starts blaming herself? Which doesn't say great things about her mental wellbeing.

I thought the same and just chocked it up to her not wanting the relationship to end and because she’s, in a way, more emotionally attached since she’s the one been that’s been pining for a while and initiated etc. So like she’s trying (/is) blaming herself so she can fix it? If that makes sense

White%20rose%20index
joined Aug 16, 2018

– "No! We can't!"
– "Why not? We're both well-experienced adult women, we've known each other for a year, and we have been going out for a month! Why the hell not?"
– "Your fingernails are too long and you're going to hurt my cunny!!!"
– "..."

This made me laugh to tears. Thx goodness for manga being so different from Western media. You won't find in a Japanese comic the dunghills of self-righteous moralizing that so often stink the works of fiction produced around here, that's fo' sure.

Eri
joined Aug 30, 2020

begone, ryouji from shiina's past. die monster, you don't belong in this world.

saltyslug5561
Yvo0lylulbwzixjblrxj
joined May 12, 2020

"It is mostly my fault though."

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

Seriously what is it with this trend in manga, victimized women blaming the themselves?

It's especially jarring in this situation since the actual guilty party is clearly aware that it's her who was in the wrong and immediately declares it to be her fault and apologizes for acting like a scumbag.

And then the victim just, ignores all of that and immediately starts blaming herself? Which doesn't say great things about her mental wellbeing.

I sometimes imagine manga as a really cutthroat movie production with a shitty director. It doesnt matter that you cant get along with your co-star and the script is shitty. We dont have much time before this thing gets axed. We gotta get this romance rolling. Whether you like it or not.

Angryface
joined Mar 22, 2021

Oh so it's only 6 chapters (judging from the credits page). I thought it was good premise but when that guy was being the ultimate wingman I was wondering why this was going so fast. Shame it's ending so soon.

The nails joke was funny.

016
joined Mar 21, 2017

"It is mostly my fault though."

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

Seriously what is it with this trend in manga, victimized women blaming the themselves?

It's especially jarring in this situation since the actual guilty party is clearly aware that it's her who was in the wrong and immediately declares it to be her fault and apologizes for acting like a scumbag.

And then the victim just, ignores all of that and immediately starts blaming herself? Which doesn't say great things about her mental wellbeing.

I sometimes imagine manga as a really cutthroat movie production with a shitty director. It doesnt matter that you cant get along with your co-star and the script is shitty. We dont have much time before this thing gets axed. We gotta get this romance rolling. Whether you like it or not.

Isn't self guilt common in these kinds of situation in real life though?

saltyslug5561
Yvo0lylulbwzixjblrxj
joined May 12, 2020

"It is mostly my fault though."

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

Seriously what is it with this trend in manga, victimized women blaming the themselves?

It's especially jarring in this situation since the actual guilty party is clearly aware that it's her who was in the wrong and immediately declares it to be her fault and apologizes for acting like a scumbag.

And then the victim just, ignores all of that and immediately starts blaming herself? Which doesn't say great things about her mental wellbeing.

I sometimes imagine manga as a really cutthroat movie production with a shitty director. It doesnt matter that you cant get along with your co-star and the script is shitty. We dont have much time before this thing gets axed. We gotta get this romance rolling. Whether you like it or not.

Isn't self guilt common in these kinds of situation in real life though?

Usually not on the first date. And depends on what you are "guilty" of. Insensitive jokes, maybe. Prying questions, maybe.This situation, definitely not. At least not without a severe lack of judgement.

last edited at Jul 19, 2022 8:35PM

Dynasty%20profile%20v13
joined Apr 27, 2018

I have a bad feeling about this... :(

joined Aug 21, 2017

I was kind of looking forward to a deeper exploration of Shiina's desperation, but I guess Okada is cool.

Dynastyscans
joined May 24, 2022

It is not even attempted rape. Being pushy but ultimately stopping when someone says no is, like, the opposite of rape. Can we stop misusing the word? We don't need to go around branding people who stop when told to stop as rapists.

You don't have to say "no" or "stop" for it to be rape! Rape is consensual sex, consent has to be given. You need explicit, specific, enthusiastic (uncoerced) consent. All types of media portray this poorly, and sadly that's had an effect on how people understand it (and vice versa ofc, media isn't made in a vacuum). I mean this less as an attack on the manga, and more an expression of my frustration with people not understanding what real world consent is.

Now, since that wasn't sex, nor did it seem like it was going toward sex (bc MC doesn't know what lesbian sex entails), so I would categorize it under the more broad "sexual assault." I think the way this manga handled it wasn't too bad though, but I agree with saltyslug, shador, and the immaculate. The characters seem to be resolving the issue; I'm happy they're both coming out of it alright (in a believable way), and I'm excited to see how this story ends.

last edited at Aug 3, 2022 12:34AM

Daremo from Parts Unknown
Avatarfilemonclipboard0111
joined May 6, 2022

Isn't self guilt common in these kinds of situation in real life though?

Guilty thoughts? Obviously! “I'm the lesbian one! She doesn't know shit about lesbian sex! I should have told her to clip her nails! This is my fault!” Of course she feels guilty.

begone, ryouji from shiina's past. die monster, you don't belong in this world.

I was looking for the right words and lo you found them for me.
#DieRyyouji
#NoRedeemArcForYou
#YouDon'tBelongInThisWorld
#PlzDie

Capture
joined Apr 16, 2020

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

It follows reality and 180k people agree.
https://twitter.com/kirawontmiss/status/1539053457973334016?t=dqVGfkqE0QKuCfYMCIQTWg&s=19

Isn't self guilt common in these kinds of situation in real life though?

Usually not on the first date. And depends on what you are "guilty" of. Insensitive jokes, maybe. Prying questions, maybe.This situation, definitely not. At least not without a severe lack of judgement.

She felt guilty because she felt she was pushy in pursuing an older woman who wasn't even sure she was attracted to the same sex at the beginning (the self-righteous would've argued that she stop whatever she was doing in the first place because it's forcing her), hence Shiina's "dating another woman is harder than I thought" statement that popped up on her mind once more, that is, they're dating now exactly because she didn't give up.

last edited at Jul 20, 2022 4:03AM

Sena
joined Jun 27, 2017

I mean, manga come from a society that's still working through "if the husband cheats on his wife, it's the wife's fault" ... progress is being made, but maybe don't always expect too much ;)

NuclearStudent
joined Dec 13, 2018

begone, ryouji from shiina's past. die monster, you don't belong in this world.

What a man you are, Ryouji. Surely Shiina won't forget about you, for ten years at least.

saltyslug5561
Yvo0lylulbwzixjblrxj
joined May 12, 2020

Oh honey. Why are you gaslighting yourself.

It follows reality and 180k people agree.
https://twitter.com/kirawontmiss/status/1539053457973334016?t=dqVGfkqE0QKuCfYMCIQTWg&s=19

Isn't self guilt common in these kinds of situation in real life though?

Usually not on the first date. And depends on what you are "guilty" of. Insensitive jokes, maybe. Prying questions, maybe.This situation, definitely not. At least not without a severe lack of judgement.

She felt guilty because she felt she was pushy in pursuing an older woman who wasn't even sure she was attracted to the same sex at the beginning (the self-righteous would've argued that she stop whatever she was doing in the first place because it's forcing her), hence Shiina's "dating another woman is harder than I thought" statement that popped up on her mind once more, that is, they're dating now exactly because she didn't give up.

Ok first of all your twitter example suggests that you should gaslight yourself to lift your spirits up, not blame yourself
Second, there are so many shitty opinions that are also popular
Third, it is twitter
Fourth, it is a joke.
Fifth, you dont give up your personal rights just because you started going out with someone. She didnt force this thirty year old into anything.

She is blameless. That is why I said "Please dont gaslight yourself". That shit is unhealthy.

Img_0215
joined Jul 29, 2017

Warning: Manga character manifesting non-optimal behavior; do not attempt at home.

Takasaki Reika
Untitled315
joined Mar 30, 2021

begone! ex-"boyfriend"!!!

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