Reading something tagged ''angst" after a long time, and once again I have realised how much of a masochist I am. Ahh I love Murasakino's works so much.

Another murasakino’s work, another good day

A lot of readers seem depressed by this story, but I actually found it quite hopeful. The blonde protagonist was trapped in an unhealthy one-sided relationship with a person who led her on about fulfilling her emotional needs without actually ever intending to, which directly resulted in the the blonde's getting physically hurt at one point. But in the end, she found the inner strength to completely extract this toxic element from her life -- and, more importantly, not to relapse later, like so many people do under the guise of "true love triumphs in the end". That this decisiveness of hers has also given the player girl enough of a pause to self-reflect and to discover her own underlying emotional needs was just a nice bonus that she had done absolutely nothing to earn.

Totaly agree, tbh some people don't get what is like to be trapped in a one-sided relationship. No matter how hard you try or how much you love them, there isn't always a happy ending. You only get hurt everytime you are not chosen and that can make you toxic on it's own way.
Who is to say the life style of the black haired girl was wrong? She didn't owe the blond girl anything; not an excusive relationship, not a night at a hotel, not even a promise to be with her in the future. Friendships are transactional yes but that doesn't mean you owe someone anything for being their friend (even if she was a shitty friend). Even if the black haired girl knew about blondy's feelings she's not obligated to anything, she wasn't even leading her on. Yes, she offer to go to a hotel ocationaly but she wasn't pushy about it when rejected.
If you think about it the guy that tryed to punch the black haired girl was probably in the same situation as the blond girl. He probably thought they were something when she is clean she's not interested in a formal relationship. Then he got upset he wasn't "chosen" and tryed to punch her in retaliation (NOT SAYING HE WAS RIGHT TO DO THAT, THO). The blond girl said something similar about stabbing her (out of frustration) even if it was a joke or hypothetical scenario.

last edited at Dec 15, 2022 2:31AM

Looking forward to the second part.

I may have cried a little bit :(

This girl is really about to willingly become a doormat for someone who doesn't even love her lol. I can't help but feel that's where this is going.

I was kinda wrong. This was a very round about story for something that's supposed to be a series? Idk either way. I am real proud of the other girl who appears to have found the strength to get out of it. In the end it feels perhaps like both of them learned something new and changed for the better from this, idk.

last edited at Jun 11, 2022 4:05PM

I was also a bit confused by senpai "realizing what she wanted as thanks". Because of course she absolutely knew that the blonde wanted to be with her, so it must be something else. So my best guess is that the blonde wanted senpai to at least change, perhaps on her behalf specifically. After that incident the blonde takes a hit for senpai, she internally laments that afterwards absolutely nothing changed about senpai's behavior, or their relationship. It's not until much later that senpai reflects and literally takes a look at herself in the mirror. After changing, she sees herself unblemished by hickies & bruises, feels liberated for once, and finally understands what the blonde wanted. Just like the title implies, the blonde made her own mark on senpai, both literally with the hickey before leaving forever, and more importantly, figuratively with her permanent departure from senpai's life.

I disagree on what she wanted, I think it was less about changing and more about the "on her behalf". The blonde hated how if she died the black haired girl would move on immediately, and that she hadn't left a permanent mark on her life. So by ghosting her like this she left a mark on her much stronger than any of the hickies recieved, or to put it in meme terms she "lives rent free in her head" now.

Even if the black haired girl knew about blondy's feelings she's not obligated to anything, she wasn't even leading her on. Yes, she offer to go to a hotel ocationaly but she wasn't pushy about it when rejected.

I agree that Senpai did not actively manipulate Chihiro, but I think she is still just as responsible for her suffering as Chihiro is herself. Senpai didn't communicate clearly and unambiguously that a committed and exclusive romantic relationship with Chihiro wasn't happening, while Chihiro couldn't bring herself to accept that fact and ignored Senpai's many, many less straightforward references to it. Senpai didn't owe Chihiro a straightforward explanation, but it would have been nice of her to inflict a clean heartbreak, rather than letting it fester like she did.

The beginning of this chapter was really exasperating, another useless lesbian stock on a relationship where the other party don't fucking care about her and has zero intention to be on a romantic relationship with her. Hopefully at the end she moves on, and I wish they don't get together. And if they do, Ms.Hetero should do all the moves.
(When will they learn, don't fall for a straight girl or the biatch of the campus)

loved it, can’t wait for part 2

Can't wait for part 2!
I feel like leaving my opinion on what the blonde girl wanted from the black haired girl. I think she wanted the black haired girl to stop getting used by others, to be in relationships that have respect and emotional connections rather than just sexual ones. I think she didn't want to go to a love hotel with the black haired girl originally because she didn't want to make their relationship just about sex, as the black haired girl tends to do with all of her relationships. It was her way of showing the black haired girl respect, that she valued her more than the other people she was with. But I know there isn't just one way to interpret this. And since there's a second part my opinion may get completely disproven.

The ending made up for it. I do like these kind of stories where one side pines for their unrequited love but I usually prefer a lighter touch. When its laid on really thick, it irritates me like "Why are you continuing to let yourself get hurt like this when she doesn't even care?"

So I'm glad she got to do her little hickey and dipped after. Looking forward to the next chapter. The POV switch was a nice touch.

Sometimes "I'm just not gonna do this" is all it takes to stop a behavior.

sees the tag.

yep no thanks.

lol, i noticed knight heron was the translator before i noticed the artist was murasakino from the thumbnail. quickly figured it out on the first page, god i love them! i was so happy that this was a ch1 and i feel like the most angst i got from this series was finding out it was a two shot on the credits page lol. also, i was shocked knight heron was picking up a series and not churning out more one shots at first... that credit page makes all the sense while breaking my heart. god i wish the author would feed all us masochist with a long series. or just a single tankabon length one. the art is so ethereal as always

I swear Murasakino-sensei and I share the same wavelength, everything they do is my cup of tea every single time (Even the insanely depressing ones)

It was the best decision chihiro could take even if it was emotionally painful. The blacky girl didn't deserve her. She continued fcking with every dude while playing around with chihiro's feelings. I see this is part one out of two so I guess they will see again. Hopefully chihiro is with someone else for good

A little gem..

last edited at Jun 12, 2022 9:24PM

who wins?

Part 1, you say??
Oh boy.

This was really really beautiful.

What did the censored part in Chihiro's letter say?

And Part1?!!
Also; MURASAKIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!

What did the censored part in Chihiro's letter say?

And Part1?!!
Also; MURASAKIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!

same question about the censored part TT i tried reading it but realized it’s written in japanese (i think) i hope someone knows what it says

I swear I've read dumb shit like this a hundred times, and a lot of them probably by Kodama Naoko. 3/10.

LOL I don't get why I'm so into this type of shits (angst) that one time I deliberately read all Kodama Naoko's works.

last edited at Aug 18, 2022 12:18PM

Reading angst is like reading some idiot's pov. Last time i said I should stop reading angst, but here I am.

Can't wait for the next chapter. Hope there is one.

well...