It's really interesting how Shibasaki-sensei wants to help Masono and really sees a reflection of herself in Masono, and yet she is denying her own "self".
There's two aspects here which Shibasaki currently sees as oppositional, but may in fact be two sides of the same coin. Shibasaki excplicitly says that "the moment what someone wants from me, and what I want to do for them align, it makes me feel good." This is contrasted with "doing something to hurt someone else, there's no way it would make anyone happy."
She's caught between her fear of hurting others that comes from her own past being bullied, and her desire to do the things that others want from her. She clearly finds it pleasurable, but she thinks that this aspect of herself is essentially the same as the people who bullied her in the past so she tries to ignore and nullify and repress it. She says she wants to be the person for Masono that she would have needed as a kid, but in many ways Masano is the person she needs now. They have a mutual need, and a desire to fulfill it, but Shibasaki rejects it
