I also despise seeing BDSM get used in toxic works. I hate the fact the kink is viewed as "that fetish where people hurt each other", when it's in fact entirely predicated on consent, communication, trust, and love. Setting boundaries and establishing dynamics and what kinds of play the partners are looking for is important, and seeing that being wholly eschewed feels kind of... Dubious to me.
A fictional work that does not claim to educate on the topic of BDSM has no obligation to fulfill that function; it's not the responsibility of artists and creatives if the sex education people receive is often severely lacking. And the charge that a fictional work is misleading about BDSM requires a stronger case than just calling its story vaguely "toxic".
If vast segments of the population believe that sexual acts in the context of BDSM are magically except from requiring consent, the situation is so cooked that just more wholesome depictions of BDSM are not enough to fix it. As for the importance of things like communication, trust, and boundaries, these principles are hardly followed consistently in queer dating outside the context of BDSM, never mind straight dating where sex is still largely viewed as something a man takes from a woman. So I don't understand being this concerned about the fictional depictions of specifically BDSM, as if our society had dating and sex all figured out otherwise. You might as well be mad at any sexual content in "toxic" works for not dispelling people's misconceptions and nasty beliefs about sex in general.
Not trying to argue for Caku here, but that first paragraph misses the point. Yes, this isn't sex ed - nobody claimed it is or should be. Doesn't change the fact some people might not enjoy such a trope for various reasons. Imagine the point instead was the narrative cliché of portraying savage populations in fantasy almost always with cultural references that are decidedly not caucasian or east asian. Or how suspiciously much asexual representation in fiction is in the form of non-human and/or unemotional characters. It's perfectly fine for people to simply not like or even criticize such an authorial decision.
No single work can be held responsible for greater societal problems, and you can't categorically condemn elements of fiction (daily reminder that Magneto is a jewish member of a secret cabal with advanced technology and an agenda of world domination and population control who controls rare metals) but shutting down all attempts to discuss the topic via highbrow dismissal is most surely not helping anybody. Doubly so since BDSM (especially in the unrelated horror genre) is associated with some really skewed ideas that cause real harm.
Besides, these two are morons. Ill intent is given on the MC's side at least, but so far all their BDSM was teasing, semi-serious pet play. Tonally, I doubt they'll be able to really harm another.
