Forum › First Love's Pledge discussion

A2bcf11834a1918b3f09b4219b2a099f_r
joined Aug 16, 2014

Takemiya's work is amazing as always! Things're always hard when you still care about the person after the breakup...

Not so much about the moving on part, [...] but the giving up and walking away part. Especially since there are quite a few yuri stories on the reader where separation is not enough to cause a breakup.

Idk, but I don't think the separation was the exact cause of the breakup. I may be projecting, but I read it as their paths in life being just too different for the relationship to work.

Also:

Long-distance relationships can be hella tough to maintain. My record is three years, and that's with someone I got along with extremely well and was committed to the relationship.

You're a hero, I'd probably not have endured a month.

last edited at Jun 13, 2015 8:18PM

Shimapanda Uploader
01
Girls in Boxes
joined Oct 18, 2014

;-; this story ;-;

Long-distance relationships can be hella tough to maintain. My record is three years, and that's with someone I got along with extremely well and was committed to the relationship.

You're a hero, I'd probably not have endured a month.

I think this is a common sentiment.

A lot of people don't seem to understand how I handle being in a long-term (nearly five years!), long-distance relationship at all. And I'd certainly say it's not for everyone... you need a lot of commitment, strong communication lines, and also the maturity to talk seriously about your future together (and not just a wishy-washy "Someday we'll be together!" kind of line).

This was a sad story, but a very realistic one...

1-1%20-%20copy
joined Feb 3, 2013

the credits lifted my spirit a little

joined Jan 8, 2014

The light haired girls farewell was very pretty I think...
U know, like wishing well and stuff even tho they both hurt...
I dunno if I had a choice in breakups id pick that awkward question mark situation over an ugly breakup...
Either way I liked the story! ^_^

41d15eb7093baec072fbb832ad7e1d7d
joined Jun 27, 2014

I am standing up and stomping my foot thinking "NO FAIR , NO DAMN FAIR " she kissed and ran and tried to pull a cutesy move with a smile . That is a sucker mover to draw a person back in the little manipulator lol . The credits page I did get a little red faced at hehe , because it reminded me about the time I went to work and forgot to take out the pill vibrator lol the battery was going dead and at odd times it would vibrate and catch me off guard .

000
joined Jan 27, 2015

just like that?

joined May 7, 2015

I feel like I can understand their breaking-up. I think it's more realistic rather than childish. From my experience, it's really hard to maintain relationship in such physical distance. Taking a lot of time to meet each other makes significant stress, and eventually leads to bad ending. Putting romance aside, it might be a wise choice. But even so, it's kinda hard to understand that she had to delete her ex's email address. Well, anyway it's a short story, not long one. I feel relief over that I'm not feeling such intense sympathy on them. I would get my heart broken if it was ending of a long series.

Nws
joined Jul 1, 2014

just like that?

That's how it goes sometimes. It's not a terrible thing though. There are many ways to break up with someone that can traumatize or mentally/emotionally damage them, especially if it's your first and it's lasted more than a year. Speaking from experience, recovery can take months, years, or never happen at all. The ending felt nice for me actually. They learned how to love and probably had great times. They ended it on a good note and will probably be amazing as a significant other in the future.

last edited at Jun 13, 2015 11:35PM

NOT TOGETHER FOREVER IN LOVE?!??!
CAN'T ACCEPT THAT...! O_O

Rsz_x7m817y
joined Jan 31, 2015

I like this. I like how the characters stated they had talked this through many times before, and had mutually agreed to break up knowing that it probably wouldn't have lasted forever. Yes, they could have tried and gotten that ~common~ yuri ending where everyone ends up happy, but I think this is a much more realistic view of how people sort of drop relationships and that relationships aren't everything to a person's being.

This was nice. And very well executed. Kudos to Takemiya Jin for being constant in her good work.

Dscans%20avatar
joined Mar 30, 2013

It didn't seem like they broke up to avoid a long distance relationship to me... In my opinion, the reason they broke up is similar to Marshall and Lily in How I Met Your Mother. One of them was interested in doing something else with their lives which involved taking a break from their partner even though they were both still into each other.

At least that's what I got out of it based on,

I am leaving this familiar town and going to Tokyo to realize my dreams.

and also

We were going down different paths so we talked it over again and again, and this is what we decided together.

Kumirei%20(2)
joined Jun 6, 2014

;-; this story ;-;

Long-distance relationships can be hella tough to maintain. My record is three years, and that's with someone I got along with extremely well and was committed to the relationship.

You're a hero, I'd probably not have endured a month.

I think this is a common sentiment.

A lot of people don't seem to understand how I handle being in a long-term (nearly five years!), long-distance relationship at all. And I'd certainly say it's not for everyone... you need a lot of commitment, strong communication lines, and also the maturity to talk seriously about your future together (and not just a wishy-washy "Someday we'll be together!" kind of line).

It's the double-edged sword of what all our modern technology advancements gives us with respect to how it is possible to maintain one. Now people who can handle one, will, and it's great for them. Unfortunately it's not for everyone. Not everyone can handle one, which makes the reality of not being able to weigh down like a brick of responsibility all the more on those who can't. Especially when one half of the pair absolutely can handle a long-dist, and the other can't.

I don't know how to feel about this one. The romantic in me is like "ITS FUCKING CLEAR YOU BOTH LOVE EACH OTHER SOPLSDNTLEVEKTHNXBYE"...but that half-page Jin dedicated to her saying her farewells to her mother just illuminated the fact that she was sacrificing everything to follow her dreams all to clearly for me to ignore. And that just boils down to the fact that the girl put...whatever "dreams" is (not clear if it's a career or a school or a specific job or what) in front of her steady relationship with her girlfriend. And you can't fault her for that.

But I can say for certain that they both brought closure to the relationship properly and well. They will carry each other on in their hearts for the rest of their lives, and find happiness within someone else in honor of each other. It's a very sweet and moving way to go about it.

KatzeDerNacht
08f6612130a20845a480034c0567fbe1d8926209_hq
joined Apr 27, 2014

Hmmm ok long distance is tough, I've had it,and of course it's another culture but...
COME ON WHY WON'T YOU MAKE MORE NICE CHEERFUL MANGA TAKEMIYA-SENSEI???

.<°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Yuu
joined Mar 28, 2015

Only thing I have to say is, "where there is a will, there is a way".

A long distance relationship "forever" is impossible, all right. But if you can overcome a temporary seperation without wavering, it can be ok.

That's exactly what the end of "Girl friends" is about if you remember. Re-read it.

Mari decides to put in the effort to make her relationship with Akko work. Even though they are both girls, even though they are not studying the same thing, even though they may be separated temporarily, if they don't give up, then it'll be all right.

last edited at Jun 14, 2015 2:42AM

My_dork__by_vnixxir-d72u531
joined Jun 21, 2013

Well....you know what they say: distance makes the heart grow fonder. I had an ocean between me and my ex yet we made it work for a year and a half (longest long distance relationship I was in was 2 1/2). Maybe they will find happiness, even if that happiness comes 10 years later when they meet again.

last edited at Jun 14, 2015 3:30AM

Alice Cheshire Moderator
Dynasty_misc015
joined Nov 7, 2014

That's exactly what the end of "Girl friends" is about if you remember. Re-read it.

Mari decides to put in the effort to make her relationship with Akko work. Even though they are both girls, even though they are not studying the same thing, even though they may be separated temporarily, if they don't give up, then it'll be all right.

This isn't like Girl Friends though. The separation at the end of Girl Friends was about them going to different schools but staying in the same city. At the very end the text Mari receives from Akko is talking about meeting up after her job or something along those lines. In this one she's going to a different city and it's implied to be too far away for them to visit each other.

Yuu
joined Mar 28, 2015

Japan isn't that huge. It's 2 hours by train between Tokyo and Kyoto. It's not the US. "Too far away" isn't really the issue. It's just that it takes extra effort to maintain the relationship.

And in Girl Friends, it's not about the distance. Like I wrote previously, if nothing connects two people, it becomes much harder to maintain a relationship for Japanese. It's a mindset of them. Even if they live in the same city.

A lot of manga are based on this : once you graduate, once you change job, once you quit a club, if nothing connects you, then all is left are the feelings. And if they are not strong enough, you drift apart. They even willingly put an end to things so as to no be "held back" by these feelings.

It's especially harder for a same sex relationship, where you can't even envision marriage in Japan.

So Mari decides to put all her might into the relationship, because her feelings are that strong.

Here, in "First Love's Pledge", the feelings are there, but they are not strong enough to warrant the effort.

last edited at Jun 14, 2015 4:38AM

Alice Cheshire Moderator
Dynasty_misc015
joined Nov 7, 2014

Japan isn't that huge. It's 2 hours by train between Tokyo and Kyoto. It's not the US.

http://i.imgur.com/cjkvtmd.png

I dunno how to embed images here but you're fairly off. Japan may not be as big as the US but it's still very large. Traveling from the Canadian border to the Mexican border is approximately the same distance. I live about 2/3rds that distance from Los Angeles and it took my family about 16 hours to drive there by car without taking a break past stopping to use the restroom or get food.

"Too far away" isn't really the issue. It's just that it takes extra effort to maintain the relationship.

But that is clearly at least part of the issue here. Since Takemiya didn't bother actually going in-depth into anything and just generalizing it instead we can't say what their dreams were or anything or how much of a factor they were in comparison to the distance which was clearly a factor. Long distance relationships are not for everyone. It's not a matter of effort. Some people simply cannot do it. On top of that it's a different culture. You cannot compare it to western culture where long distance relationships are a lot more common.

A lot of manga are based on this : once you graduate, once you change job, once you quit a club, if nothing connects you, then all is left are the feelings. And if they are not strong enough, you drift apart. They even willingly put an end to things so as to no be "held back" by these feelings.

Which as someone pointed out earlier is part of Japanese culture... Again: Different cultures. Trying to judge it by western standards is not fair.

Yuu
joined Mar 28, 2015

Japan has bullet trains and trains everywhere. Their railroad system is one of the best in the world.

And anyway,, I don't think that people go to the extreme of going to live apart, one in the extreme north and the other in the extreme south. There's a middle ground. So, at most, it should be a few hours by train. If you can't do it regularly, then it means you don't want to put the effort in.

I don't judge them, because it's part of their culture. But somehow, they are aware it's an issue because it's often a plot point in their fictions.

Even being in different classes can spell the end of a friendship.

last edited at Jun 14, 2015 5:00AM

1461894977557
joined Jun 12, 2015

My main issue with Takemiya Jin's art is same faces syndrom.

joined May 3, 2014

"Breaking up because we're taking different paths.". It's so forced.

Japanese seem to think that living in different places, or even not going to the same university, spells the end of any relationship. What are phones, internet, trains or planes for?

If you're in love enough, you'd want to make your relationship work, no matter what.

Byousoku 5 Centimeter (5 Centimetres Per Second) this move is the same ......i fuking hate that ending >.> LIKE WTF !!!

well i just don't like that kinda of endings ~.~ that's all

last edited at Jun 14, 2015 11:51AM

Cyfer Uploader
513ovydfscl
Divulge Scans
joined Jun 17, 2014

I'm usually one to defend a story like this especially from Takemiya Jin, but even in light of Nya-chan's points this is still a bit hard to suspend belief for.

Damnit Nez, we were counting on you.

I don't have the energy to say "People break up when they move cities all the time all over the world," and "You know nothing (about Japanese culture) J'anon Snow," every five minutes.

joined Jan 8, 2014

Lol @ cyfer!
Yeah I was thinking the same thing like...whats up with this "only in japan ish?"

I mean depending on perspective...long distance relationships could be considered unhealthy...of course if you have plans to marry or live together indefinitely its a diff story but if your just staying together for the sake of staying together.... shrug

Nezchan Moderator
Meiling%20bun%20150px
joined Jun 28, 2012

Granted of course, in a bygone age couples managed to find a way even when the only communication was a letter that took weeks or even months to arrive. And there are a great many yuri stories like Yearning For Macaron, Summer Is All About and Female x Female = Love which push the idea of putting in the effort to make a LDR work. The possibility is there, even if you're Japanese.

Dark_Tzitzimine
67763073_p3
joined Dec 18, 2013

I'd say that the biggest issue is that we don't get any context for the break up. We don't know why they can't go together nor what are the plans each girl has, that combined with the multiple showing of love between the two leaves the reader with the impression of the breaking being done by drama's sake.

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