jesus

i wasn't expecting things to go well but like

geez

So we had the "trends in behavior amongst children who've been subject to domestic violence" in chapter 2 and missing hymen now. This is more than foreshadowing

So we had the "trends in behavior amongst children who've been subject to domestic violence" in chapter 2 and missing hymen now. This is more than foreshadowing

Most women have the majority of their hymenal tissue worn away by adolescence.

It's her job.

If she's rude to customers, word gets out and it's harder to get new requests.

I don't think she was particularly nice. She was professional.

There's something to be said for good customer service. It isn't ubiquitous even in prostitution. She did a pretty good job handling the situation and being nice.

So we had the "trends in behavior amongst children who've been subject to domestic violence" in chapter 2 and missing hymen now. This is more than foreshadowing

Most women have the majority of their hymenal tissue worn away by adolescence.

Wait, really? Is that true? But it's flesh, won't it renew itself?

It's her job.

If she's rude to customers, word gets out and it's harder to get new requests.

I don't think she was particularly nice. She was professional.

There's something to be said for good customer service. It isn't ubiquitous even in prostitution. She did a pretty good job handling the situation and being nice.

I agree, she actually connected with the protagonist on a human level.

So we had the "trends in behavior amongst children who've been subject to domestic violence" in chapter 2 and missing hymen now. This is more than foreshadowing

Most women have the majority of their hymenal tissue worn away by adolescence.

Wait, really? Is that true? But it's flesh, won't it renew itself?

It's actually a membrane rather than muscle. It doesn't regenerate, and some girls don't have one in the first place.

If anyone's interested, she's doing a series on Pixiv writing an exchange diary with herself (JP only).
https://comic.pixiv.net/works/2308

Just the next 22p chapter then this 10p omake left - probably be done by the end of November.

As far as I understand it, the note on this page is wrong. リバ (riba) comes from リバーシブル (reversible), not "liberty"... anyway, minor quibble!

Oops.
Welp, whoever wrote the 'Lesbian slang terms' article on Wikipedia wasn't sure either ^^
http://puu.sh/rJcxM/5873615cf1.png

"hehe, you're really kind, aren't you"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Not sure why, but ch4 really got to me. I mean, everything's been depressing up to now, but this was just like sadness laid bare. I feel like the simplicity of it somehow conveys so much more.

That lady was a really nice lady, very supportive

Well is this not a job of a prostitute to be nice to the customer? (Okay, I'm not very sure)
But yeah, maybe she was really a nice person.

A prostitute's job is to meet their customer's needs, normally it's their emotional and sexual needs, sometimes that means being supportive and kind, sometimes it means "punishing" them for being naughty or whatever.

Very interesting to see this from a female's experience on this topic. I don't necessarily see this as depressing but rather like a moral of a story, even though i'm sure this manga isn't over yet. The feelings the protagonist has is real. Many people have these feelings (I have a bit of anxiety) and therefore can connect to this on a level. Interesting read, truly.

I was surprised that she was able to be decisive about some things regarding the experience (which hotel, which type of room). I kinda expected her to be too nervous and overwhelmed and just defer everything to the pro. But then that lead to another surprise that she was unable to tell the woman what she was really looking for out of the experience. She went on extensively in previous chapters about how all she really wanted (at least for now) is an older woman to hug and hold her.

Maybe she left out some of her rationalization that changed her mind, or maybe she was mentally pushing herself to "get the most out of the experience" if she really never thought she'd do it again. But I can't help but think she would have enjoyed it more if she had clearly said she was afraid of that level of intimacy and only wanted to be held for that session.

I was surprised that she was able to be decisive about some things regarding the experience (which hotel, which type of room). I kinda expected her to be too nervous and overwhelmed and just defer everything to the pro. But then that lead to another surprise that she was unable to tell the woman what she was really looking for out of the experience. She went on extensively in previous chapters about how all she really wanted (at least for now) is an older woman to hug and hold her.

Maybe she left out some of her rationalization that changed her mind, or maybe she was mentally pushing herself to "get the most out of the experience" if she really never thought she'd do it again. But I can't help but think she would have enjoyed it more if she had clearly said she was afraid of that level of intimacy and only wanted to be held for that session.

That's how social anxiety works, unfortunately: your brain shuts off and you go flying blind. Sometimes you make good choices, sometimes you fail to remember most important things.

I'm sorry I never wanted to be rude (in fact I'm an ace) I came at that conclusion by the lack of desire towards his partner and many other reasons that I saw, maybe she's homoromantic o she's not
(I'm not good in English, sorry if I made a mistake )

You weren't being rude. I just think that we really don't know what sexuality she is because she doesn't even really know.

It's cool if you can relate being an ace to her experience, but personally, IMHO, I think it's best to hold off. Depression can really do a number on one's sexual drive. (from personal experience I know this)

Depression can really do a number on one's sexual drive. (from personal experience I know this)

Yup. They say the mind is the greatest aphrodisiac; it works the other way, too.

last edited at Oct 15, 2016 4:52AM

This is hitting way too close to home, I can't read this without having to take a break to look away and breathe deeply and not scream.

This.
No other work has yet stirred up so many emotions in me than this one

last edited at Oct 15, 2016 5:42AM

i don't usually read depressing af tag, but i doesn't feel depressing to me, the axienty fells real, i think the feel to don't disappoint her parents are the main reason her axienty, or maybe she likes her mother in sexual way?

I had a similar experience recently. I've been thinking love/a relationship would solve all my anxiety/loneliness/anti-social problems but any time I'm around the girl that likes me I get shaken up, freeze up, and words won't come out. I can only imagine it would get worse somehow if I did manage to go out with her.

I broke up with someone a few months back because I went through something like this. Couldn't even hold a proper conversation at times and felt like I was dragging them down.

It's cool if you can relate being an ace to her experience, but personally, IMHO, I think it's best to hold off. Depression can really do a number on one's sexual drive. (from personal experience I know this)

yeah, you're right

I'm sorry I never wanted to be rude (in fact I'm an ace) I came at that conclusion by the lack of desire towards his partner and many other reasons that I saw, maybe she's homoromantic o she's not
(I'm not good in English, sorry if I made a mistake )

You weren't being rude. I just think that we really don't know what sexuality she is because she doesn't even really know.

It's cool if you can relate being an ace to her experience, but personally, IMHO, I think it's best to hold off. Depression can really do a number on one's sexual drive. (from personal experience I know this)

Yeah, she's dealing with big time depression and also social anxiety, neither of which are very helpful to the libido. And she's hardly the only person who's ever been too nervous to get aroused during a first sexual experience.

She seems pretty sure that she's into women sexually. It's just that sex isn't actually what she was needing, she needs friendship and intimacy a lot more right now.

This is scary to me, as someone who suffered (suffers?) from eating disorders.

That is depressing but Not that sad Im at the beginning but I hope it gets a nice ending I wanna hug that Girl so badly ;(

That is depressing but Not that sad Im at the beginning but I hope it gets a nice ending I wanna hug that Girl so badly ;(

This entire chapter was about how nerve-wrackingly anxious she gets when thrust into a physically intimate situation with a complete stranger...

Hugging her is the last thing to do.

It just makes her utterly uncomfortable.