Evilnemesis

She was a bit vexed that he did not wish to share with her his feelings. Once you start putting barriers between your partner on what you can or can't share is where the danger happens, the falling off.

Some time back, a friend of mine was close friends with a married couple; she was actually living with them at that time. (I'm absolutely sure she wasn't involved with either.) Then tragedy struck and the wife died in her sleep. I went to see my friend to offer her my condolences and any support I could and... She completely shut me out. She wouldn't tell me anything of what she was feeling or let me offer any kind of support. She all but chased me out.

Let me tell you vexed is not the word. THAT HURT! I had thought I was close to her and it hurt like hell. Had we been lovers it would have been a huge step toward breaking my trust in her and definitely driven us toward breakup. (Not that the damage couldn't be repaired if it's addressed quickly, but was it?)

The sports injury may have even been a relatively small thing, but his shutting her out was anything but small.

And then he left the hospital without even telling her he had done so. I may be mistaken, but it looked to me like she went to the hospital to see him and found he wasn't there, and she had to email him to find out what happened.

Maybe when he said he was going away for those few days, he spur of the moment decided to enlist in the army and stayed gone. He could have sent her a text or a phone call which isn't very personal considering that's someone you are dating and could have been something to break her trust.

Thank you Halmoni and Thatanon!

Repost:

---

Thanks to thatanon for making a rough typeset of Chapter 52!

 
A rough typeset has been uploaded to flutteringfeelings.imgur.com (short address: bit.do/ffi).

Chapter 52 rough typeset by thatanon
http://imgur.com/a/tJFCq

Enjoy!

Yuri Girl 1001

Evilnemesis

She was a bit vexed that he did not wish to share with her his feelings. Once you start putting barriers between your partner on what you can or can't share is where the danger happens, the falling off.

Some time back, a friend of mine was close friends with a married couple; she was actually living with them at that time. (I'm absolutely sure she wasn't involved with either.) Then tragedy struck and the wife died in her sleep. I went to see my friend to offer her my condolences and any support I could and... She completely shut me out. She wouldn't tell me anything of what she was feeling or let me offer any kind of support. She all but chased me out.

Let me tell you vexed is not the word. THAT HURT! I had thought I was close to her and it hurt like hell. Had we been lovers it would have been a huge step toward breaking my trust in her and definitely driven us toward breakup. (Not that the damage couldn't be repaired if it's addressed quickly, but was it?)

Very much in agreement. Me and my GF had a few moments that came very close to that similar type of situation and it hurt both of us and still does to a minor degree (not saying someone died or anything but one of us went through a very rough time and didn't say a word about it to the other until they got through it). We discussed it and worked towards a much more appropriate way of dealing with difficult situations. No matter how difficult the subject may seem, don't keep it in and always talk to your significant other about it. Don't be afraid to do so if you think they may think you're weak or something but in reality, it's the complete opposite.

The sports injury may have even been a relatively small thing, but his shutting her out was anything but small.

To you the sports injury may seem minor but to him it was a huge freakin deal! He appears that he made his entire life revolve around the sport and maybe was hoping to go pro. However, it sounds like it was a recurring injury and those can really screw you up if not taken care of properly. He probably had a LOT of self-image, masculinity, personality, and other things wrapped up in soccer and it just came crashing down as that's all he appears to have known in his life.

I had a trainer who was in an academy for a pro team in Scotland tell a near identical story. They made fun of the kid working in the bakery and going to school but then he took a serious knee injury that ended his chances and since he had no back up... kiiiinda put a stop to his life. The lesson was (at least to me), always have a back-up because a sports injury can f**k you right up. That happened to him and now he is a trainer for a youth league in California.

And then he left the hospital without even telling her he had done so. I may be mistaken, but it looked to me like she went to the hospital to see him and found he wasn't there, and she had to email him to find out what happened.

I believe the worst part was him just up and running away when she came to visit him in the hospital when she got the text long after he departed. Not sure about No-rae saying her feelings were taking cracks that signify her falling out of love. I think it's more like the feeling of them not reaching Sung-pyo and feeling helpless and not knowing how to take it. At least, that's what it seems to me.

Evilnemesis

She was a bit vexed that he did not wish to share with her his feelings. Once you start putting barriers between your partner on what you can or can't share is where the danger happens, the falling off.

Some time back, a friend of mine was close friends with a married couple; she was actually living with them at that time. (I'm absolutely sure she wasn't involved with either.) Then tragedy struck and the wife died in her sleep. I went to see my friend to offer her my condolences and any support I could and... She completely shut me out. She wouldn't tell me anything of what she was feeling or let me offer any kind of support. She all but chased me out.

Let me tell you vexed is not the word. THAT HURT! I had thought I was close to her and it hurt like hell. Had we been lovers it would have been a huge step toward breaking my trust in her and definitely driven us toward breakup. (Not that the damage couldn't be repaired if it's addressed quickly, but was it?)

The sports injury may have even been a relatively small thing, but his shutting her out was anything but small.

And then he left the hospital without even telling her he had done so. I may be mistaken, but it looked to me like she went to the hospital to see him and found he wasn't there, and she had to email him to find out what happened.

Wow I never realized how it can hurt the other party by not letting them in :/ I'm actually the kind that shuts people out but I do so because I don't think anyone really cares-- I mean I'm more aware now but I think it depends on experiences because if you've been let down your whole life, it's kinda hard to trust someone

Random Reader

To you the sports injury may seem minor but to him it was a huge freakin deal! He appears that he made his entire life revolve around the sport and maybe was hoping to go pro. However, it sounds like it was a recurring injury and those can really screw you up if not taken care of properly. He probably had a LOT of self-image, masculinity, personality, and other things wrapped up in soccer and it just came crashing down as that's all he appears to have known in his life.

Sorry, I didn't say that very well. I didn't mean to imply that the injury itself was a small thing. What I meant was that it's overall impact on their relationship could have been a small thing. Of course if he's devoted to sports and he can't continue because of it, it can be devastating to him (edit: and to her too, perhaps). But he didn't have to let it be devastating to their relationship.

last edited at Nov 22, 2015 10:08PM

Of course if he's devoted to sports and he can't continue because of it, it can be devastating to him (edit: and to her too, perhaps). But he didn't have to let it be devastating to their relationship.

And I think thats how Sung Pyo crushed Norae's feelings and trust. Eventually it seemed like his love for her wasnt enough to help him overcome the loss and confusion. He just took off and ran away.

Hmm... I like this segment.

It seems to me that they're just both young and life is rearing it's ugly head. She had an idealistic (inexperienced) model of their relationship, and his world was pretty much what Friend said, No-rae and soccer--but soccer was first.

When you lose the main focus of most of your waking hours, that'll unbalance anyone. And especially for a young person, he probably hadn't experienced many types of loss yet.--Shoot. I've been thrown completely off balance being asked to take a break from work (first job after college). I didn't know what to do with myself. I'd heard of burn out before, but I didn't really learn to ...put it (work) in perspective until I was away from it. And, I'm still learning to take vacation. For some people, taking it easy is...not even a thought, but, for some of us, "taking" work away is nearly terrifying until we learn that it's not "everything".

Yes, I'm acutely aware of the pain No-rae could have felt by being left out, but, at this point in their lives, I only have sympathy for both of them. No-rae's youth afforded her an equally fragile position. These are completely understandable reactions. They haven't yet learned the skills to navigate that situation, not even individually, probably.

This is more or less exactly what I wanted (and expected from Ssamba); a very common relationship hurdle that prevails in the face of lacking experience on both sides. Nothing super dramatic, angsty, etc.

Thank you Ssamba. And additional thanks to @halmoni and @thatanon for putting (intelligible) words to the text (for me) so quickly. ^.^!!

Some time back, a friend of mine was close friends with a married couple; she was actually living with them at that time. (I'm absolutely sure she wasn't involved with either.) Then tragedy struck and the wife died in her sleep. I went to see my friend to offer her my condolences and any support I could and... She completely shut me out. She wouldn't tell me anything of what she was feeling or let me offer any kind of support. She all but chased me out.

Let me tell you vexed is not the word. THAT HURT! I had thought I was close to her and it hurt like hell. Had we been lovers it would have been a huge step toward breaking my trust in her and definitely driven us toward breakup. (Not that the damage couldn't be repaired if it's addressed quickly, but was it?)

I can sympathize. How close was this to the death?

I always deal with grief the same way, I will ignore everyone for 1-2 weeks and then I emerge from my shell and feel good enough to deal with people. I've hurt a person in the past as well and so from that point on I've been pretty good about telling people that they should try not to be hurt if I do this and I ask them to respect my grieving process. I hadn't had a problem ever since.

This chapter was interesting. I like seeing how No-rae was in the past, and how she was with Sung Pyo... I must admit they had a lot of cute moments.
I think it's interesting how No-rae acts differently with Seol-a than she did with Sung Pyo. Idk but to me she seems more... genuine? I think it's been said before but Seol-a does seem to know the 'inner' No-rae more than Sung Pyo.
I miss short-haired No-rae hehe >_< But I liked this chapter too!

Interesting chapter, so I guess the ex didnt tell No-Rae about his enlist on the army either. It seems like keeping things is something he does. That might have hurt No-Rae and thats how they broke up.

So Im expecting another flashback chapter next week, because it doesnt seem like Its over /cries

Evilnemesis

I can sympathize. How close was this to the death?

It was in fact the very same morning. Which means, of course, that she let me know in a timely manner, she just didn't want me involved in any way. But there were other people that she was letting in (metaphorically), so to me at that time, it felt like it was just me being shut out. But that's all actually beside the point. I just wanted to point out how much it hurts to be shut out by someone you thought you were close to, and the fact that it makes you believe that you weren't so close after all. And I'm sure No-Rae had thought she was very close to Sung Pyo.

ffins07

Yes, I'm acutely aware of the pain No-rae could have felt by being left out, but, at this point in their lives, I only have sympathy for both of them.

I freely admit that I've really only been thinking about No-Rae in this situation and not Sung Pyo (who, after all, is also hurting a lot). Does that make me heartless?

It was in fact the very same morning. Which means, of course, that she let me know in a timely manner, she just didn't want me involved in any way. But there were other people that she was letting in (metaphorically), so to me at that time, it felt like it was just me being shut out.

That sounds pretty bad. My friend felt the same once upon a time, felt upset that I didn't want to talk about it with him initially. It sorted itself though.

But that's all actually beside the point. I just wanted to point out how much it hurts to be shut out by someone you thought you were close to, and the fact that it makes you believe that you weren't so close after all. And I'm sure No-Rae had thought she was very close to Sung Pyo.

I freely admit that I've really only been thinking about No-Rae in this situation and not Sung Pyo (who, after all, is also hurting a lot). Does that make me heartless?

Empathize with her for being in a situation you were once in? Plus we've had no time for to be involved emotionally with Sung Pyo, he's pretty recent. It's kind of "who dis guy is?"

Sorry, couldn't help it.

ieeheh
Of course if he's devoted to sports and he can't continue because of it, it can be devastating to him (edit: and to her too, perhaps). But he didn't have to let it be devastating to their relationship.

And I think thats how Sung Pyo crushed Norae's feelings and trust. Eventually it seemed like his love for her wasnt enough to help him overcome the loss and confusion. He just took off and ran away.

I very much agree. She must have felt devastated for not being 'trustworthy enough of his inner feelings'. Especially if you consider how close she thought they were and not only her, even Kkyeung also mentioned it (see below).

Hye-kyung: Dummy. Then all you have to do is stay by his side and look over him.
Hye-kyung: There's nothing in Sung-pyo oppa's head, aside from you and soccer.
Hye-kyung: You guys go crazy for each other!

Apparently staying by his side, being there for him and looking over him was not enough for him to overcome whichever barrier that is holding him back from sharing his feelings and thoughs with her at this crucial time.

Just like ffins said:

ffins

It seems to me that they're just both young and life is rearing it's ugly head. She had an idealistic (inexperienced) model of their relationship, and his world was pretty much what Friend said, No-rae and soccer--but soccer was first.

Soccer came -as how I interpreted it as well- first, at least at that time being.
---He seems to regret the way he handled things though, and probable came to realize how much No-rae truly meant for him when he was in the military, far far away from her for a long period of time. Remember that scene Kkyeung told Seol-a that Sung-pyo came to meet with her, during his serving time. He must have realised how wrong he was, pushing No-rae away like that. And wants her back? Fortunately for us, No-rae has (almost) moved on -into Seol-a's arms that is.---

And if soccer was his main drive force, imagine his whole world came crashing down. So bad that No-rae's love and affection are ineffective, which in my books triggers alarm bells on No-rae's side, maybe not right away on the conscious level, but surely subconsciously. I think a part of her already knew this as well ( the fact that she came in second):

Text: "I'd like it if nothing happened."
Text: Because if that means that you'll let someone else score a goal, then I'd feel a little relieved.
*Text: If that means that we can always be together.

---

Edit: So here are my thoughs...if you take what I said above and apply it with the 'crack-metaphor':

Text: But...
Text: An unavoidable crack.
Text: They slowly becoming cracked.
Text: His feelings,
Text: And mine.

I would interpreted this as:
The crack happens on a subconscious level, this is why both of them weren't aware of it.
The moment it was prominent, and thus conscious it was already too late. The damage has been done.

I'm sure if one of them knew what a catastrophic effect this would have on their relationship, one of them for sure try to manage the crack from tearing to the point of no return. No-rae seems willing anyways, as how it appears to me, if you take a closer look at her wordings on Sung-pyo throughout this chapter.

---

At that time he was not crazy enough for No-rae... (or at least he did not realise how crazy he was, until after hindsights).

I wonder whether pride and status played a big part in the equation? I know 'losing face' in most Asian countries is a major thing. Is this the same in Korea as well?

---

On another note:
I love how we can see all aspects of the characters. Like how Seol-a plays golf and now No-rae with her music talent.

I'm soooo drooling over No-rae being able to play the guitar. How romantic would it be if No-rae wrote a song for Seol-a?! Ssamba, pleease. :D

Thank you Ssamba for this awesome comic. Halmoni, thatanon for translation and roughs and anonymous for QC on this chapter.

/please mind my English, I'm not native. And oops for the wall of text.

last edited at Nov 23, 2015 9:57AM

Wow I never realized how it can hurt the other party by not letting them in :/ I'm actually the kind that shuts people out but I do so because I don't think anyone really cares-- I mean I'm more aware now but I think it depends on experiences because if you've been let down your whole life, it's kinda hard to trust someone

I'm the same way, but I've tried real hard to come to grips with it and actually trust people. Recently my mum had an accident and had to go into hospital and she only told one of my brothers. She didn't want us to worry but also didn't understand how much we cared about her and it was only after she was released said brother sent me and other brother a text about what happened. We both then called up our mum and yelled at her for not letting us know.

You gotta let people close to you know what's going on, more than likely they want to help. Sometimes the hardest thing is actually accepting help when it's offered.

Wow I never realized how it can hurt the other party by not letting them in :/ I'm actually the kind that shuts people out but I do so because I don't think anyone really cares-- I mean I'm more aware now but I think it depends on experiences because if you've been let down your whole life, it's kinda hard to trust someone

I do that too. But it's not that anyone comes and asks if there's something wrong with me, so I generally just don't tell them. I do believe though that if someone cares they generally will ask you. If they don't ask you, it's no big deal to them, so no need to go on telling them about your problems. This can have the opposite effect on a lot of people, they grow tired of hearing problems.

We have to keep in mind that people have different coping mechanisms when they are faced with something difficult in their lives. Some people feel better by holding into people close to them, while others just need time to process and confront it on their own. Some people are introverts, some extroverts.
My opinion is that if someone needs time, the other person has to be understanding too. If they don't feel like opening up, the other party should not take it into heart so much. Just like how some people are more prone to jealousy, while others don't get jealous easily. Some people even want their partner to get jealous just to feel they care for them. others feel suffocated. Not everyone shows their love/emotions the same but I'm not talking about extreme situations though.

That being said, I also believe there are two types of shutting people off. The first is just being alone and trying to figure things out. The second is being a jerk/rude and lash out their anger on people who care about them. And this is the wrong type.

So, will Sung-Pyo or even No-Rae never find someone who can have a long term relationship with, just because they might have this habit? There is always a good match for everyone. Some people bring out different sides of yourself that others are not able to.
For example if someone else was in No-Rae's situation they might have handle it differently and not freak out. I'm not saying it's bad how she acted, but to me, they ultimately were not a good match. It seemed like they were good in their good times, but when a difficult time rised they fell apart. Being able to handle someone's bad sides is very important in a relationship, more important than the good times imo.

This will be my frist post in this thread, so Hi everyone!

I've been reading FF since it came out almost a year ago. I'm a huge fan of this manhua and of Yuri as a genre.

I wanted to start by saying the following:

Regarding some opinions about the story (pacing, character development, etc.), I have just one thing to say: how many yuri do you have out there that actually have a compeling semi-realistic storytelling with actual character development? I think of Octave, Girlfriends, Sasameki Koto and Aoi Hana as powerful examples and from there my memory goes fade because I can't think of any other long-lasting mangas with great stories. Sure, you have some more, but they are usually shorter mangas. Either due to budget cuts or any other reason (like plagirism, which caused Prism to stop being published) they end up as short stories and we don't even get to see the full potential of the author or even of the story itself.

FF appeared and gave new life to a genre that was falling into the same old bs of fanservice with nothing else attached to it. Sakura Trick was great for everyone who lusts after fanservice; so is any anime of the sort like Sono Hanabira or even Shoujo Sect that rely completly and solely on the sexual components. And all of these are clearly targeted towards cisgender heterossexual male audiences. I'm not saying I didn't enjoy these, I did. I also love my share of fanservice.

The truth is, in spite of the many mistakes that Ssamba might have done on the way she is telling the story, this is still a great treat for anyone who has been reading Yuri for years and is sick and tired of the Romantic Relationship canon and the plotless fanservice (which is my case). I, as a Yuri lover, thrive for a positive evolution of the genre and we won't get that if we don't get past the fanservice and go through stories like FF which may lack in originality when you look at literary tropes, but which are in some way new to the genre. We may have seen all these things happen in so many tv shows or books, but have we seen it happen in yuri manga? It's a rare sight, since no one seems to invest in the genre at all.

So before we complain about it, let's first look at the good influence manhuas like FF might have: more yuri stories with complexity and intrincacy.

I'd like to finish this by pointing that, yes Ssamba has a few issues here and there. Such as the fact that everyone seems to have the same face, so it gets confusing at times. Especially the male characters, I find them hard to tell apart.

Moving on to the last chapter:

I think that both No-Rae and Sung Pyo were in a tight spot. They both felt powerless in that situation. Sung Pyo especially, since he saw all of his life's work and dedication to soccer going down the drain alongside all of his dreams and ambitions. Of course it took a deep tool on him psychological speaking, so it seems natural to me that it would affect his relationships and the way he perceived his own life and future from that point on.

No-Rae, on the other hand, felt pretty much like shit because she saw all of this happen and she couldn't do anything to change it. She saw the ambitions and goals of someone she loved shatter and the consequences it would have on them.
It really seems natural to me that it would put a lot of pressure on the relationship, because it was pressuring them at an individual level as well.

Regarding Seol-a and No-Rae's future, I really have no idea what to expect. Things seem very complicated with Sung Pyo coming into the scene and I don't know if No-Rae is going to have to deal with some emotional and psychological wounds that might still be left. We'll have to wait to see.

It has now been one year that FF's English translation/scanlation efforts have started.

 
https://archive.loveisover.me/u/thread/1629837/
Tue 18 Nov 2014 23:22:09 No.1629837

 
Thank you to jrdp_18, Haggant, Kanaria, Ryo and others (cannot list them all since "Anonymous") for starting this thing, bringing this then completely unknown series to English-speaking/reading audiences everywhere!

And thank you to halmoni, one of the biggest contributors to making this thing possible.

And of course, thank you to every single person who has ever contributed to FF.

last edited at Nov 24, 2015 6:31AM

It has now been one year that FF's English translation/scanlation efforts have started.

 
https://archive.loveisover.me/u/thread/1629837/
Tue 18 Nov 2014 23:22:09 No.1629837

 
Thank you to jrdp_18, Haggant, Kanaria, Ryo and others (cannot list them all since "Anonymous") for starting this thing, bringing this then completely unknown series to English-speaking/reading audiences everywhere!

And thank you to halmoni, one of the biggest contributors to making this thing possible.

And of course, thank you to every single person who has ever contributed to FF.

Happy Anniversary Everyone!!! :) I cant say that I was with it from the very start, but CONSIDER ME HOOKED! :)
Seolrae forever! <3

FF has come a long way in a year. When I started reading FF I was going though a bad break up and it would take my mind off of it. Lol totally hooked now because I have so much love for this manga. Thank you everyone who has made it possible for us to enjoy FF!!

It has now been one year that FF's English translation/scanlation efforts have started.

 
https://archive.loveisover.me/u/thread/1629837/
Tue 18 Nov 2014 23:22:09 No.1629837

 
Thank you to jrdp_18, Haggant, Kanaria, Ryo and others (cannot list them all since "Anonymous") for starting this thing, bringing this then completely unknown series to English-speaking/reading audiences everywhere!

And thank you to halmoni, one of the biggest contributors to making this thing possible.

And of course, thank you to every single person who has ever contributed to FF.

-nods head to all of the above-
Could not agree more.
Honestly, Thank you!! to each and every individual who has made FF to what it is today.

FF is my favourite manhwa (and manga/comic) thus far, yuri or non-yuri, (and will probably remain #1)
Have always loved character-development based stories. Not to mention the strokes Ssamba use to portray all those different emotions... truly amazing. It looks so simple and effortless, but we know better.

What are the chances FF will be so popular that Naver/Comico/Ssamba or whoever is in charge decide to make FF more than the initial 100 chapters?
Heck I'm willing to donate on monthly if not weekly base for this!

Ssamba forever!!! xD

last edited at Nov 24, 2015 1:02PM

I read this http://www.israelnationalnews.com/News/News.aspx/178938 and thought of FF. "All North Koreans Must Have Kim Jong-Un's Haircut"
Anyone knows if it's true? It must really suck if it is

Wow, so that's how it was. It's great that it goes in line with all of the posted speculation yet remains unique. Ssamba is such a great writer! And oh my god, that No-rae with a guitar!!! How sexy she is!! I like her with shorter hair more though. But nevertheless, she's just gorgeous with the instrument - suits her character so much. I wonder what kind of music does she listens to. She's quite often portrayed with headphones.

Chapter 53
http://comico.toast.com/titles/85/chapters/57