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Konami
joined Jan 18, 2014

classic takemiya jin :(

2656
joined Nov 30, 2011

Mmmm... interesting to see Takemiya get to the 2nd page for a quick one shot like this after half a day. The discussion sort of reminds me of an interview Michael Cain did when he said he was, "retiring from movies." He stated that he wasn't so much as retiring as that now he is in a position where he can pick what movies or projects he wants to do. This was unlike him for most of his career where he was just taking almost any script that was pushed his way because he needed the work and money. Maybe we're witnessing the same thing with Takemiya? She's putting out a lot of works, some which are good and memorable and others which are forgettable. Unlike most of us who probably didn't see Cain's career in its heyday, maybe we are seeing Takemiya's??

Just a thought.

Billportrait
joined Jan 17, 2014

Boyfriend-san? ''So, like this and that happened''?

A + writing, would read again

I'm not a particularly big fan of this one but I think picking on those two details is a bit eh. It might seem lazy but not bothering naming him just shows that his name is entirely irrelevant to the story. Same with that second part. It's implied it's something fairly small and that's all that's really relevant to the story. I think there are far more valid criticisms you could make of it such as some of the stuff others have pointed out.

I was just poking fun at the apathy that I read out of it, which I guess, tainted my experience

Clearly, she either didn't care to remember his name or she forgot entirely which is weird when her Senpai is doing that all the time. Apathy

Clearly Jin didn't want to think about ANY reason why they are fighting again 'cept boyfriend goofed up again, I guess. Apathy

Clearly, I couldn't feel any concern for the Kouhais Situation since she can't even refuse her and has no redeeming qualities in this story except she is pretty good in hiding her feelings and lamenting her situation, making me feel apathy towards this.

Come on, it doesn't need much to please me writers, just give me a little more information, give him atleast some presence in the world other than the foil to the Kouhai because that would be very unfair to him or make the Kouhai go rethink her situation, meta that shit up, it's not hard, really.

last edited at Nov 25, 2014 3:54PM

Download
joined Aug 8, 2013

Love is cruel, especially yuri love... :(

Dscans%20avatar
joined Mar 30, 2013

Boyfriend-san? ''So, like this and that happened''?

A + writing, would read again

I'm not a particularly big fan of this one but I think picking on those two details is a bit eh. It might seem lazy but not bothering naming him just shows that his name is entirely irrelevant to the story. Same with that second part. It's implied it's something fairly small and that's all that's really relevant to the story. I think there are far more valid criticisms you could make of it such as some of the stuff others have pointed out.

I was just poking fun at the apathy that I read out of it, which I guess, tainted my experience

Clearly, she either didn't care to remember his name or she forgot entirely which is weird when her Senpai is doing that all the time. Apathy

Clearly Jin didn't want to think about ANY reason why they are fighting again 'cept boyfriend goofed up again, I guess. Apathy

Clearly, I couldn't feel any concern for the Kouhais Situation since she can't even refuse her and has no redeeming qualities in this story except she is pretty good in hiding her feelings and lamenting her situation, making me feel apathy towards this.

Come on, it doesn't need much to please me writers, just give me a little more information, give him atleast some presence in the world other than the foil to the Kouhai because that would be very unfair to him or make the Kouhai go rethink her situation, meta that shit up, it's not hard, really.

It seemed completely on purpose that Takemiya had Hana-chan say such vague things. It seemed like a formula where you just plug things in. From the very beginning, Hana tells us that everything the senpai is doing has been done before many times. She goes "Again, huh..." when her senpai asks to watch a movie together. If it's been happening that many times then most people would likely stop caring about what the guy's name is or what he did. Because, no matter what, they either end up getting back together or her senpai finds another guy to do the same exact thing with. A person like Hana, who understands exactly what kind of situation she's in and almost "kisses" her with no intention of actually kissing her, is detached at this point. It makes me question what Hana's feelings are like at this point. Maybe she really does still love her senpai. Or maybe she's just gotten used to the routine of pitying herself at her senpai's pity parties.

It seems like you think the author half-assed it, but it doesn't seem like that to me. Maybe I'm missing something or maybe I noticed something that wasn't actually there.

41d15eb7093baec072fbb832ad7e1d7d
joined Jun 27, 2014

And I am glad I am a lesbian , I really don't want to deal with men lol although some women can be worse than men :D , luckily I have someone who won't pull this level of stuff.

Love.live!.600.1492198
joined Sep 4, 2014

Sigh. This is how I feel every time I fall for a straight girl....

Don't fall in love with straight people. It always hurts. :v

7559b8a9-a380-4c4d-84c0-67d9a337a5d3
joined Jan 30, 2013

Depressing lol

Alice Cheshire Moderator
Dynasty_misc015
joined Nov 7, 2014

It seemed completely on purpose that Takemiya had Hana-chan say such vague things. It seemed like a formula where you just plug things in. From the very beginning, Hana tells us that everything the senpai is doing has been done before many times. She goes "Again, huh..." when her senpai asks to watch a movie together. If it's been happening that many times then most people would likely stop caring about what the guy's name is or what he did. Because, no matter what, they either end up getting back together or her senpai finds another guy to do the same exact thing with. A person like Hana, who understands exactly what kind of situation she's in and almost "kisses" her with no intention of actually kissing her, is detached at this point. It makes me question what Hana's feelings are like at this point. Maybe she really does still love her senpai. Or maybe she's just gotten used to the routine of pitying herself at her senpai's pity parties.

It seems like you think the author half-assed it, but it doesn't seem like that to me. Maybe I'm missing something or maybe I noticed something that wasn't actually there.

This is more or less how I see it too, though I think I explained it a lot worse. If you look at it that way it's actually fairly realistic too. I think it's like Laika, Pavlov, Pochihachikou in that regard where if you don't look into it enough it ends up looking worse than if you look into it thoroughly. Just in this case it ends up making people think the author is being lazy rather than one of the characters looking a lot worse than she is.

123118
joined Jan 31, 2013

Depressing lol

Especially if you relate to it ... really sad experience D:

joined Jul 8, 2013

Seriously, Takemiya Jin....Why don't you understand how I feel about your shitty endings...even tho I love you this much...? WHY CAN'T YOUR CHARACTERS EVER JUST GET TOGETHER!?

Image
joined Oct 27, 2013

Sigh.. So deja vu -talking about personal experience-

joined Jan 8, 2014

Jin is one of my faves because she writes stories like this...dont get me wrong, I love when the friends actually do become lovers, but this honest interpretation of what really can happen or has happened is beautiful too!

Afueee
joined Apr 5, 2013

Great. Reading this while feeling down wasn't the greatest of my ideas.

Dynasty02
joined May 25, 2013

It's so depressing because a lot of people can probably relate to this. Lezzie's are bound to get their heart broken some point in their life because the person they love won't love them back in the same way.

942301_10151455987491840_2065344422_n
joined Aug 26, 2011

I just something teary..... now just reading this has added a weight on my shoulder, to much.

Webp.net-resizeimage%20(1)
joined Apr 19, 2012

Well, it's sad, but pretty realistic though. :D My first love (straight one, of course) told me her boyfriend is similar to me and that's the reason she likes him so much. :D And I love everything from Takemiya, so no complaints here.

Wow. That sucks. I'm sorry to hear that.
Though that definitely has also happened to me too.

anyway. I laughed at the word bitchfest. It was just funny, ya know?

513ovydfscl
Divulge Scans
joined Jun 17, 2014

anyway. I laughed at the word bitchfest. It was just funny, ya know?

Tears of joy fell from my eyes when I realised there was a near-literal translation for 愚痴大会

1501044073854
joined Jun 12, 2012

okay...

Minayoko
joined Aug 11, 2013

Really now. For Jin's standards, this was disappointing. I've never been too much of a fangirl of her art, but her storytelling is usually always pretty great stuff. But this...* shrugs * Oh well. I guess everyone messes up sometimes.

Tmp_bh7jrkjcyaakw52-1123006053
joined Apr 15, 2011

Really now. For Jin's standards, this was disappointing. I've never been too much of a fangirl of her art, but her storytelling is usually always pretty great stuff. But this...* shrugs * Oh well. I guess everyone messes up sometimes.

messes up? i'd hardly say that. besides, one of her other stories will be released soon enough, and we'll all most likely be raving about how wonderful it is and this little pup will be lost to the winds (meaning no one will remember it or why they disagreeded with it).

to anyone: if you disagree with the above statement, then name 5 or more stories (oneshouts/djs/or series) that suck? i would be surprised if anyone can.

last edited at Nov 26, 2014 11:21PM

9a905fe6a22b0201f7ade2de48a73f8d
joined Jan 22, 2014

Maybe first, how about not taking the most raw elements story like those offer and actually give them something resembling a character:
Boyfriend-san? seriously, not even a name? Or should I call him Foil-san?
''This and that?'' What did he do? Did he upset you? Did he flirt with another girl? Or can I take it, that's what the Kouhai is actually experiencing and it's all from her perspective, which is why the script doesn't give two fucks and a corndog?

Maybe it's a little harsh but I will not root for Yuri if it's set-piece storytelling

You see, the one who narrates, and tell the story isn't Izumi, but Hana. It's not line the Author didn't bother to find a name for the boyfriend, but it's a way of showing how little he matters to Hana. This also holds for "So like that, and that happened ...", we experience the story through Hana's perspective, and she does't even listening to what Izumi's tanking about.

Too much information is just as bad as too little. The identity of "Boyfriend-san" clearly isn't relevant to the plot, and Hana wouldn't know who was it, if you asked her a second later, so it would be weird for the reader to know about that.

The story is a very short, but "Boyfriend-san"-'s backstory definitely isn't the thing it's missing.

last edited at Nov 26, 2014 10:55PM

Billportrait
joined Jan 17, 2014

You see, the one who narrates, and tell the story isn't Izumi, but Hana. It's not line the Author didn't bother to find a name for the boyfriend, but it's a way of showing how little he matters to Hana. This also holds for "So like that, and that happened ...", we experience the story through Hana's perspective, and she does't even listening to what Izumi's tanking about.

Too much information is just as bad as too little. The identity of "Boyfriend-san" clearly isn't relevant to the plot, and Hana wouldn't know who was it, if you asked her a second later, so it would be weird for the reader to know about that.

The story is a very short, but "Boyfriend-san"-'s backstory definitely isn't the thing it's missing.

As I said, I already considered that and that would make sense but it doesn't set her in a good light at all, atleast not in such an short one-shot like this one it makes her sound like the least likeable of all of the three involved. I guess some people can sympathise with this because they experienced it first hand but from a story perspective there is absolutly nothing that gives this one an identity on it's own because you could switch the artist and nobody would notice it. Many stories can be told over and over again like Revenge plots in the form of Moby Dick and Star Trek II: Wrath of Khan or Hamlet and The Lion King or Romeo & Juliet that finds itself in other stories short arcs, those you can't strip of their shell that easily.

Giving the boyfriend a backstory is not really what I want, I want him to have atleast done something that I can either relate to despise, anything that makes gives him just a little more presence, because how I read it, it sounded more like the author just needed things to fall in place, set-piece storytelling: Character C does Character B wrong, Character B goes crying to Character A.

But what the heck, it's a short one-story for something that should have been something in the 2/3 act or something, no use thinking too hard about it.

last edited at Nov 27, 2014 4:49AM

Alice Cheshire Moderator
Dynasty_misc015
joined Nov 7, 2014

to anyone: if you disagree with the above statement, then name 5 or more stories (oneshouts/djs/or series) that suck? i would be surprised if anyone can.

I wouldn't say any of them actually suck but both this and Irrational Us are worse than her usual works in my opinion. Worse being just alright rather than great. Also a lot of people are unhappy with the ending of Fragments of Love. (Though I don't find the ending necessarily disappointing personally. I just hope that in the extras they follow up on the developments of the last chapter because the chapter felt like it ended a little too soon to me.)

Bayonettamachinekill
joined Apr 8, 2013

I wonder if the author is heartbroken... I mean, her last works are so depressing...

She is and I must learn Japanese to get her heart meter up...I mean I do speak to her on Twitter in Japanese using a great translator..,but wish I could do iy myself.

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