I'm like you. I couldn't resist the suspense anymore. I went to Mangadex and read it.
I was like "Development! YAY!" I totally loved it, I was so thrilled...

... until the final page.

I won't bother with spoiler format, since I'm only discussing earlier chapters:
If Ayako saw herself as a lesbian I really don't think she would have so lightly proposed kissing Asuka after she confessed (and been so surprised when it escalated).
Also the carefree way she shrugs off Akira's flirting. She has a child and her husband has been gone for 16 years... if she had any impulse to settle down with a woman she has had plenty of opportunity, as observed in earlier chapters Ayako and Akira were functionally Asuka's parents in the early years, but it appears Ayako never tried to make it into a relationship (even though Akira desired it).

I'm inclined to see her as demi (functionally ace/aro until Asuka started pushing her buttons).

ok first of all, Ayako's butt
second of all, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Here come the chapter. Like i said in spoiler, i think Ayako might be a lesbian (in the closet probably) but wanted to have a family, since she doesn't have her mom when she was younger. When Akira's bro propose to her, she probably cease the opportunity to have a family and have the family she doesn't have but Husband die (probably because of some shenanigans with Akira since she feel guilty about it. Not that she is the one who kill him directly but she might have said or done something that cause him to have the accident) and she have to raise her daughter alone (well with the help of Akira but mostly alone). I think she have succeed to keep in check for the few times before for Asuka (thought some moments have been harderthan other) because she know that Asuka wouldn't go anywhere far from her and she will still be her daughter but when she see her with Asuka's Senpai, she realise that Asuka could possibly be snatch away from her and ruining her family.So she decide to get along with Asuka's antics to make sure Asuka stay but the ending make me believe she realise she gone a bit too far.

I want to know more about the mom.. i need to see what happend ...and she’s getting more expressions as well... i wonder

Me getting to that last page:

Fuuck.

When's CH16?

1x1/2 and unrequited love are converging D:

last edited at Jan 24, 2020 9:58PM by

Here come the chapter. Like i said in spoiler, i think Ayako might be a lesbian (in the closet probably) but wanted to have a family, since she doesn't have her mom when she was younger. When Akira's bro propose to her, she probably cease the opportunity to have a family and have the family she doesn't have but Husband die (probably because of some shenanigans with Akira since she feel guilty about it. Not that she is the one who kill him directly but she might have said or done something that cause him to have the accident) and she have to raise her daughter alone (well with the help of Akira but mostly alone). I think she have succeed to keep in check for the few times before for Asuka (thought some moments have been harderthan other) because she know that Asuka wouldn't go anywhere far from her and she will still be her daughter but when she see her with Asuka's Senpai, she realise that Asuka could possibly be snatch away from her and ruining her family.So she decide to get along with Asuka's antics to make sure Asuka stay but the ending make me believe she realise she gone a bit too far.

That's a cool assumption :D
This is what I think, Ayako never felt love for anyone and didn't care much for relationships. She probably just went along with the marriage because she doesn't know what to feel. When she got married, she probably cheated with Akira and the husband found out. Might leading to him getting into an accident right after finding out. Hence why Akira feels guilty about her affection for Ayako. I'm guessing when Ayako's stated "someone like me wanting a family with someone was a long dream from the very beginning", Ayako probably wanted a family so she can feel "normal". I'm not 100% on that Ayako wanted a child primarily but she probably did it to be "normal" because she think she's an outcast for her lack of emotions. In addition to her being a cheater, she thinks she doesn't deserve to be happy? Also a far stretch because we don't know 100% she was sexually assaulted as a child, she probably thinks she's "tainted" or "dirty" like most common women think when they are assaulted, hence her not deserving to be happy. Idk this is just what I think.
But who knows? We might when Taiyaki posts the next few chapters. I'm so excited for Ayako's past.

I hope mom talks this over with Akira and is helped to the realization that she can have her Asuka and eat her, too.

I'm inclined to see her as demi (functionally ace/aro until Asuka started pushing her buttons).

Still feeling pretty good about this interpretation even after the new part, and also my previous comments about alexithymia (see my posting history for more detailed discussion).
Link again for good measure since the condition is not very well known: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexithymia
Wp definition: "Alexithymia is a personality construct characterized by the subclinical inability to identify and describe emotions experienced by one's self or others."

That's what I think her "someone like me" comment was about (or asexuality which has similar implications), the self-doubt that she is even capable of real feelings/relationships. Up until now her maternal feelings for Asuka have been the one (emotional) thing she was absolutely certain of... and now that is shattered.

Feeling guilty/ashamed after all but assaulting your 16 year old daughter in a fit of jealous lust is pretty natural. She doesn't understand her own motives so she can't even start to forgive herself (or realise that Asuka wasn't particularly upset).

Fuuck.

When's CH16?

1x1/2 and unrequited love are converging D:

Well, that's going to be painful to read. I can hear the cracks of my own coming heartbreak. :(

I hope mom talks this over with Akira and is helped to the realization that she can have her Asuka and eat her, too.

I like this comment so much.

Ayako's wording of her thoughts and Asuka's dream make me wonder... Could Asuka be adopted?

Edit: I had some related theories almost two years ago, too...

last edited at Jan 24, 2020 11:32PM

I saw this coming Asuka is moments away from getting what she claims she wanted only to get cold feet at the last possible second, and Ayako completely freaking out knowing what she was about to do. Completely predictable outcome.

So guys, do you think Ayako and Asuka will end up together? Or they'll just end up understanding that they've misunderstood their mother and daughter relationship?The theory that Ayako could have cheated with Akira makes me worry that Akira might go in between them X(.
I really want Ayako and Asuka to end up togetherrrr even if I have to taint my soul for that lol

last edited at Jan 24, 2020 11:16PM

And finally I make an account, just to comment on this thread. This manga is something of a masterpiece, and I never would have guessed I'd like something with such fucked-up subject matter this much. In terms of both writing and art, it's way beyond most of what's out there. (What's the comics/manga equivalent of cinematography? Taiyaki's a master at it, whatever you call it. The angles and perspectives and the way emotion is visually conveyed in this manga are all incredible.)

In response to Liliwyrt's theory — I think that may be in the general area of what's going on, but I don't think that's quite it. If that's what it was, it would basically just mean that Ayako was carrying around a bunch of internalized homophobia, and I feel that mixing up the issues of Ayako struggling with being a lesbian with the incestuous side of things could very easily end up having a bunch of unfortunate implications. Given that Taiyaki is a lesbian herself, I don't think she would go there. I think there probably is something going on with Akira and whatever happened to Atsushi, but we still don't know what. I have some ideas about what's happening now and where this is going, but it turned into pretty much a whole essay when I went to write it out. I'll share my thoughts once I've trimmed it down a bit...

I saw this coming Asuka is moments away from getting what she claims she wanted only to get cold feet at the last possible second, and Ayako completely freaking out knowing what she was about to do. Completely predictable outcome.

I think mostly she was worried by Ayako's sudden change in behaviour and wanted reassurance everything was ok (that and her legs were about to give out!).

For fuck's sake Asuka you're like if Tottenham was a person

ah shit here we go

Here we go again
Waiting patiently for the next glorious chapter

Now press Y to wait

It's here!!!! And I already want more. Thank you so much for translations and being as quick as possible!

I saw this coming Asuka is moments away from getting what she claims she wanted only to get cold feet at the last possible second, and Ayako completely freaking out knowing what she was about to do. Completely predictable outcome.

I think mostly she was worried by Ayako's sudden change in behaviour and wanted reassurance everything was ok (that and her legs were about to give out!).

Nope Asuka got cold feet and Ayako got totally freaked out

I think it's more than that she couldn't handle it. It was more forced than natural, and it freaked Asuka out, then Ayako snaps out of the daze she's in.

Q~Q T_T Q~Q

Oh.
For.
Fucks.
Sake.

Every single emotion hit hard like a run away train when reading this chapter. Taiyaki you EVIL genius!

last edited at Jan 25, 2020 1:52AM