Forum › Not Black, Not White discussion
Good stuff
as much i have a very positive view about poly stuff, this is not right.
is something that needs to be certain with both sides, otherwise is not heathy for anyone. one of them will have to give up on something eventually.
You skipped over Nari's posts, that's fine. Several others chose to respond to Nari. As discussion is presumably one of the goals of having a forum, Nari's posts have "added" plenty.
I don't know if you'll find this useful, but quoting Wikipedia:
Massive wall of text
The massive wall of text (MWOT) often appears in disputes and bombards you with so much information and underhanded hostility that it's almost impossible to keep up without replying with one of your own. MWOTs are a good indication that people are talking past each other. Common features include:
# New arguments unrelated to the matter at hand
# Already-discussed arguments
# Giant paragraphs that never really come to a point
# Thinly-veiled personal attacks
Some walls of text are intentionally disruptive, such as when a poster attempts to overwhelm a discussion with a mass of irrelevant kilobytes. Other walls are due to lack of awareness of good practices, such as when a poster tries to cram every one of their cogent points into a single comprehensive response that is roughly the length of a short novel. Not all long posts are walls of text; just remember: the longer it is, the less of it people will read.
Mwots here take bi-poly ways irl, judge them then use them to condemn this story. Not cool.
You skipped over Nari's posts, that's fine. Several others chose to respond to Nari. As discussion is presumably one of the goals of having a forum, Nari's posts have "added" plenty.
I don't know if you'll find this useful, but quoting Wikipedia:
Sure. I'll condense your post to only the parts which concern me.
The massive wall of text (MWOT) often appears in disputes and bombards you with so much information and underhanded hostility that it's almost impossible to keep up without replying with one of your own.
I believe the onus of a reply is always on the one replying. While some folks find it very difficult to do so and I sympathise with that to a degree, the act and contents of any given post ultimately lie with the one making it. To the contrary too, I found several of the replies perfectly respectful, constructive and succinct.
underhanded hostility
Thinly-veiled personal attacks
If you're able to point out either of these things happening in Nari's posts, I am here.
Mwots here take bi-poly ways irl, judge them then use them to condemn this story. Not cool.
If you're able to point out specific examples of Nari - or anyone else - using this story or its actors to judge real people for their romantic or sexual orientations, I am here.
Thank you.
last edited at Dec 20, 2021 1:20AM
Well, I think we all learned a valuable lesson here today.
If you're able to point out specific examples of Nari - or anyone else - using this story or its actors to judge real people for their romantic or sexual orientations, I am here.
Me, do your job for you?
Trop la flemme.
If you're able to point out specific examples of Nari - or anyone else - using this story or its actors to judge real people for their romantic or sexual orientations, I am here.
Me, do your job for you?
Trop la flemme.
Rule 11 reads thus:
Homophobia, biphobia, and transphobia are grounds for immediate removal from the site.
You've come into this thread and made a very serious insinuation that could see other users removed from the site entirely. You are the third person to do so - which means I have now reviewed each post in this thread at least three times. Unlike the previous two, who left without bothering to further justify their statements, you chose to make a meaningless and disrespectful reply. I am left wondering if there was a point to any of this besides wasting even more of my time. You've been banned for a day.
The next insinuation of a specific rule violation in this thread that fails to provide any evidence will see the insinuator removed from the forums. Please stop wasting my time. Thank you.
last edited at Dec 21, 2021 1:14AM
I enjoyed this a lot more than its prequel, but go figure; between falling in love stories and stories about people in love trying to figure out how, or even what, to get out of the relationship that they want, I almost always prefer the latter.
ugh. i hate yoshioka. just gtfo out of her life lmao.
as a polyam, it hurts to see that a lot of comments say that their relationship was weird. yes, it was quite unhealthy, but Yoshioka let Matsuno know that she's into other people whom she thought actually agrees in the first place. Matsuno's clearly monogamous, so either of them should decide wether to leave or stay.
kinda shitty. why are all works with the bisexual tag always like this. it's like a warning now
Reading this back over, I'm kind of wondering if Yoshioka was experiencing comphet to a degree. That's not to undermine her potential bisexuality (I am bi) and it's not to undermine her potential for being poly (I'm dating someone who's poly), those are valid readings of the story. This is just a potential alternative way of reading it.
Yoshioka was seemingly never satisfied with men, and she never had a romantic relationship with any she had previously been with that we know of. It looks as though those relationships were purely sexual. We don't know how she engaged with men either, but we do know how she engaged with Yuka. Yoshioka was the instigator, the "top," I guess you could say, and Yuka always goes along with it and in doing so, took on the more traditionally "feminine" role. Yoshioka had moments where she'd mention that Yuka - in being stereotypically "feminine" - was making her horny, and for her to not sleep with anyone else since moving in with Yuka, she's clearly being satisfied by Yuka sexually, and possibly romantically too.
It's something that none of the men Yoshioka saw ever managed to achieve, which makes me wonder, was Yoshioka mostly seeking male attention out because the attention made her feel good, but because she is actually a lesbian, the sex was never fulfilling in the way that it is with Yuka. Kind of like, if anyone is familiar with the lesbian YouTuber Alayna Joy and her story. She mistook enjoying attention for sexual attraction toward the opposite sex, so sought that out, but now that Yoshioka has experienced a lesbian relationship, she is only just now coming to realise her own feelings and her own capacity for romantic and sexual attractions that are more in line with her "true" sexuality. Lesbianism likely wasn't even on her radar as an option until Yuka, after all.
Yuka had her "a-ha" moment in the first chapter, but maybe this "I haven't seen anyone else since moving in with you," thing is the beginning of Yoshioka's "a-ha" moment. The relationship is still early days, it would be nice to have another chapter from Yoshioka's perspective as she realises her feelings for Yuka more and more.
....this relationship is very unhealthy and I'm a bit uncomfortable with the fact that some of you think it's okay
One of them is poly and the other is clearly uncomfortable with that fact (and yes, it's okay to be uncomfortable with that because it's a personal preference), in what world would this end up nicely for Yuka?
Yeah, the point of the story was to show that love is not black and white, which is true, but Yuka has to keep hurting herself just to realize that?
I'm just going to imagine that Yuka broke up with her amicably and found herself someone that matches her needs, right now it's leaving a bad taste in my mouth
Honestly, this is not very complicated. They should not be a couple.
Risa and her actions, despite her being open about it, would be by most people seen in a negative light. Decent people care about the feelings of other people, especially those who care about you. Sure, her actions would be seen as acceptable by this extremely small minority group, but that’s not the norm in society and it never will be.
What little we learn about Risa I would say that she should probably reflect on why she acts as she does, maybe with a psychologist.
The people arguing that Yuka is fine with this relationship must be reading a different story. It is made very clear that she is stuck by her feelings, and this is causing her pain.
last edited at Jul 6, 2023 4:36AM
2 years late to the club, but isn't this part of I Don't Love Her, but I Love Her, the anthology with https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/an_undesirable_relationship? I know everyone's upset that it's an unhealthy relationship, but isn't that kind of the point of the anthology that it's kind of fucked up relationships?
Risa is a self-centered woman, who continues to keep Yuka around her tail. Not because she loves Yuka, but because she constantly wants someone she know will be there to love her. Because she likes to play around, with people that aren't necessarily attached to her, she still needs someone else there to hold her pride. Risa liked that Yuka felt jealous, because it told her one thing, it's that Yuka has completely fall for her trap of narcissism. It's been clear since day one that Risa never wanted to, and never liked to commit to relationships(this is an information critical for if the thought of her being a polyamorous person occurs*), it's the fact that she isn't attached to anyone; but instead prefers that one person is at least attached to her, while she plays with many other people. In short Risa is a narcissistic player, who has the right victim in her hands. Risa gets off on the fact that, even though she is a horrible person for liking to sleep around a lot, at the end of the day she still has at least one person who is emotionally attached to her where she can just go to, to cope—until she gets bored, and a new cycle repeats.
My mind goes through a lot when I read this.
My mind goes "isn't that what usually happens for the normal man x woman love? If I were to replace Risa as a man, then the whole love affair makes sense!
And then it goes
" What if Yuka is depicted as the housewife, or the married woman? "
But then, why is that this way of living is extremely normal and considered normal if we applied to male x female setting but it's extremely uncommon and uncomfortable when we place it a female x female setting?
But we all agree to an extent that, no matter if your pairing is male x female or female x female, if one is poly, and the other is devoted, then it makes the whole relationship terrible/disgusting.
Normally, we'll go with "just break up,you two. You know that one person enjoys a poly relationship will and would never be able to be faithful, why would you the devoted ones have to keep this relationship and make yourself suffer?"
Then again, it's a very complicated situation when it involves marriage. The thing about poly female x devoted female is that one could break free if the devoted one decided to leave. But what about the normal love? The ones who involve in marriage?
I have a feeling that once the relationship is bound in marriage, a lot of other things come up and it's difficult to get off the contract with the thought of "just signing the papers"..
last edited at Mar 18, 2025 4:46AM
Having reread this now, I personally thought the story was decent and interesting. However, I felt it lacked a bit of depth and grounding, it could’ve used more layers. As many other readers here have mentioned, seeing things from Risa's perspective would have added more nuance and complexity. At the end of the day, any relationship story benefits from showing multiple sides. Viewing everything solely through Yuka’s lens made it feel one-sided, and from my perspective, it unintentionally painted Risa as the “bad guy”.
I’m looking at their relationship from two perspectives. As another user mentioned here, this is just the beginning of their relationship, and it clearly needs more communication. That’s why things feel rocky, they need to better understand each other, rather than Yuka constantly trying to convince herself that she’s okay with everything just because she loves Risa.
The second perspective is that this relationship might not last, simply because there are too many unresolved disagreements. Yuka doesn’t seem comfortable with Risa being involved with other people while they’re together, and Risa doesn’t appear willing to change that, since she enjoys the comfort that comes from being with others.
But despite this one-shot feeling a bit messy, in my opinion, I still think it’s great to see a story like this in the yuri community. While it’s always lovely to read cute and fluffy stories that blossom into something beautiful, it’s also important, and refreshing to have stories that don’t necessarily guarantee a happy ending. It brings more variety and realism to the genre. :)
last edited at Apr 4, 2025 6:09PM