Yikes, the absolute state of the comments re the parents.
I kinda don't really wanna get involved with the war on which mum is better, I said my piece regards that in the past: ↓
I am seeing a lot of comments praising one mom and discrediting the other.
This is no good, neither mom are perfect. Both care about their children, just one is absent emotionally and the other is absent presently. Neither is ideal and neither is particularly lordable, in context:
You have one mom who's off running down her teenage fantasies, whilst her daughter was at home crying on her birthday no less, because she's lonely with no one to celebrate with let's not forget, that's not good parenting in my book.. however, too her credit, she's always supportive of her kid, and wants her to be happy.
Then you have the other, who's completely aloof to her kids mental well-being. She's there but not there, doesn't seem to be at all attentive to her kids feelings, again, not very good parenting, but too her credit, she's there and cares about her kids safety.
This however, isn't to discredit the author. What I like about the authors work is, that's it's well done enough, that you can see the strengths and flaws of the parents, reflecting in their children. That's a mark of good writing to my mind, very impressed. :)
However I ought to perhaps amend that given Xiao Lu's mums homophobia. This is inexcusable but unsurprising to me as someone with traditionalist parents. A lot of people in the comments have very young/liberal/modern western parents but some don't and have very conservative parents and for the former, perhaps I can enlighten them as to what it's like:
My parents were strict, growing up was tough at times but also solid, I had fun as well, they were there for me, they loved me as any good parent would, they did their level best to make sure I was educated, well fed and cared for as again, any good parent would but being traditionalist and somewhat conservative, there was an expectation that I'd marry the opposite sex and have kids. (I have no interest in either currently but that's a different matter all together) Anyway, my parents traditionalist disposition? (lack of better terms, I apologise.) means that there would not be any way that I'd tell them that I'd come out to them as anything other than straight. It'd wreck them and unfortunately that's just the way it is and that's just how they are. If the case were ever to be that I'd fallen in love with someone of the same sex, my parents wouldn't know or I'd simply cut my parents off. I still love them regardless but I couldn't face that scenario with them. They're not the kind of person that would hate or mistreat someone because they're LGBTQ or anything like that but they still prefer that their own house follows in their footsteps and my entire family for the most part feels the same. I am alone in my "nonconformity". Despite all this, I still love my family and always will. This is not to say, I'd want my own kids or anyone elses to have to go through this, I don't, however, it is to say, I understand the reality of it. Anyway, enough about my experience, this is just to give an idea of what it can be like.
Back to XiaoLu, her situation is even more difficult because she's still young and has a greater distance to her parents (mother anyway) emotionally. Her mother much like mine, though wants the best for her, has an idea or forced ideal of what she wants her daughter's future to be like, and anything that doesn't fit with that, is unfathomable to her. Her mother always seems miserable, which really doesn't help things, she really shouldn't be showing her emotional baggage to her child like this. Whatever problems she's having, her child deserves better. Oh no, I dragged on too long and lost my thought at points. Hopefully it helps though.
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