pg 3, "He's in charge of too many idols for just one man, is the issue" wording would be better as "that is the issue"?

pg 15 has "some twice"

Is page 20 what happened when they first met or is that page 9? and page 20 is what she imagined might of happened if she had said she was cute?

Kirari is best girl.

Kirari is best girl.

What about Anzu?

Kirari is best girl.

What about Anzu?

Anzu is best girl's wife.

pg 3, "He's in charge of too many idols for just one man, is the issue" wording would be better as "that is the issue"?

Not really? "[Statement], is the issue" is a pretty common, if informal, sentence structure. I guess it's just a colloquialism you're unfamiliar with?

Yeah, is the issue flows better than the more awkward "that is the issue".

The emotion of the big scene was kind of lowered by the crocs

Is page 20 what happened when they first met or is that page 9? and page 20 is what she imagined might of happened if she had said she was cute?

When they first met is spread between pages 1, the last panel of 2, 9, the first panel of 10, the last panel of 14, and 20. It's all supposed to be sequential, I think.

The emotion of the big scene was kind of lowered by the crocs

I thought that at first, too. But thinking about it more, I find it's a really good design choice. They play off of Anzu's cynical characterization, and in that panel reflect her relaxed psychological state and place behind the scenes. All of that contrasts starkly with Kirari's anxiousness and role center stage.

The tactlessness of it gels with Anzu's "I'm no good at confessions" confession. Which actually manages to be really endearing.

last edited at Apr 18, 2017 6:32PM