lls at dofu yea umm sounds like she wasnt practicing poly as much as just using the term to hide a really bad jealousy complex. Ive been having lots of conversations about it lately and the more i have them the more i feel like im the elephant in the room, or like i said a dirty word. it kinda reminds me about the conversations i used to have every time i said i was a lesbian lol like i had to take the time to educate people about my sexual orientation ugh its frustrating Any how ive probably said to much already so ill leave it at that..

/ horrid realization that imoto and I have been friends for more than a decade /

lol ive had the same reaction about a gazzilion times about me and my ex....

my mother is txting me, its always so nice to wake up to her txt messages .________. I have to go have lunch with her and her 30 year old BF its going to kill me, so i may just have to have two pre game mimosas for this shit.. lol
i should bring the intern smh im too considerate some times

last edited at May 14, 2016 10:11AM

/ horrid realization that imoto and I have been friends for more than a decade /

xD Time is a scary thing, eh? Lol

Yeah... 29 next month... joining you and kanojo in the old folks home soon :P

Yes, we had some refreshingly nice conversations when we visited them on Mother's Day. I don't expect him to become the next gay rights ambassador, but if we can just remain civil like that with each other, I'll be happy enough.

Good :)

kanojo's dad has an entire room of the house dedicated to his antique gun collection. I think there are some swords in there, too. He claims all of them are still functional...

A whole room? Okay, question: how big is that room exactly?

Ummm, for a room dedicated to old guns, I'd say quite big lol. At least a couple hundred square feet. They live in a very big house... There are guns all over the walls and gun racks and other things that don't at all follow gun safety recommendations. I guess at least it requires a separate key to get in there...

I currently live in Thessaloniki xD

Is that in Greece as well?

Oo oo I want to go there :D Beautiful plus pretty name. I sold the idea to kanojo comparing it to her that way lmao... I can be sly once in a blue moon.

lls at dofu yea umm sounds like she wasnt practicing poly as much as just using the term to hide a really bad jealousy complex. Ive been having lots of conversations about it lately and the more i have them the more i feel like im the elephant in the room, or like i said a dirty word. it kinda reminds me about the conversations i used to have every time i said i was a lesbian lol like i had to take the time to educate people about my sexual orientation ugh its frustrating Any how ive probably said to much already so ill leave it at that..

Lol that's not too much :P I haven't spoken to that woman in years so there's really no way I could have a recent update on her. Since then I've had more discussions with people who are poly and it's a less foreign idea to me, but I'm sure it still requires a lot of getting people up to speed for you.

/ horrid realization that imoto and I have been friends for more than a decade /

lol ive had the same reaction about a gazzilion times about me and my ex....

I didn't go to my 10 year high school reunion, which I'm sure could have given me a few more horrible thoughts in this direction also lol

my mother is txting me, its always so nice to wake up to her txt messages .________. I have to go have lunch with her and her 30 year old BF its going to kill me, so i may just have to have two pre game mimosas for this shit.. lol
i should bring the intern smh im too considerate some times

Haha when I hear about older women with hot young boyfriends, I'm usually thinking "good for her!" but I never thought about if that person were my mother. I'd like to think I'd still be happy for her, but spending time with them... ehhhh... I like to think my parents have had sex precisely 3 times, once for each kid...

yes, you're right about citrus!!
and yeah I do see you in the wdtfs thread some times XD
btw, I wanted to ask what city you live in, if you don't mind telling me ^-^

I currently live in Thessaloniki xD

omg, I'm going there during the summer!! (July) would you um... like to meet some day??

I currently live in Thessaloniki xD

Is that in Greece as well?

Oo oo I want to go there :D Beautiful plus pretty name. I sold the idea to kanojo comparing it to her that way lmao... I can be sly once in a blue moon.

the shady alleys and disorganized buildings are kind of interesting XD just be careful with the rubbish bins and the parked cars >.>

Well, she didn't directly say that and she probably doesn't even realize she insinuated it and I guess she didn't mean to but... she did insinuate it and I didn't like that... because when it comes to trying to encourage she'll tell me "don't worry, you'll be fine" but technically she'd never say that she'll just try to make sure she makes a bunch of plans in case I mess up and when I say it's not needed she will insist that it probably is. It's all lies; her trusting me, it's just that if I ask her directly she'll act like a good mother and say she does but when it all comes down to it she just thinks I'm not mature enough or responsible enough or whatever.

It's pretty normal for parents to have some back up plans or saved money in case their kids need more than expected. It's not normal to let their kids know about said safeguards unless they're necessary. But yeah, can't emphasize enough that providing for yourself is important. Even if she continues doing stuff you don't appreciate, you can move on day to day not caring as much about her actions.

I know it's normal but I have already thought of different ways to get over a financial crisis for next time. And I didn't disagree with my mom taking student loan with me but she wanted to take a huge amount 10,000€ and I'm like why not less? and she says I might need more or whatnot (I would hardly have needed more than 4,000 now but fortunately the scholarship people decided to send it next week -.-). I was a bit annoyed she wanted to take that huge amount because of the interest. But she wanted to anyway and I said ok, I literally agreed with her but I said I don't think I will need it and she kept going on and on phrasing things in a very annoying way as though it was set in stone that I will actually go through some huge trouble and need money in the future and that she wants to have money to send me because she doesn't have anything unless she takes a loan... =.= as though she needs to step up and save and what's more, I will definitely return the money to my mom (to the bank? -.-) if I borrow some but if I don't need it or if I need just a little bit she will be paying a bunch of interests for no reason and at this point it just feels like she's only doing it to feel like she's helping or something rather than because she actually wants to sincerely help me. It feels more like she fears what the villagers will gossip behind her back if she doesn't do a lot for me; no, it's not I like I believe this, I just faintly get the feeling some times.

That's a part of life that's hard to learn how to navigate no matter how old you get. But mild heartbreak is probably accurate. You have to really want something from the person for it to be extra bad, and it seems like you're still occupied trying to get your footing in school and work and college life in general. Try not to let it get you too down and focus on getting done the things you have control over :)

it's not that; I'd never let school and other stuff (or more accurately it wouldn't happen) get in the way of my feelings for someone.

Not letting something happen and something that "wouldn't happen" are very separate things. You don't really know what you will and will not do until you're met with a challenge.

But I have. I say it wouldn't happen because it never happened to me that anything else would get in the way of my feelings for someone. If I'm truly interested in someone I will never say I have no time for them; I have time to hang out with friends and time to laze around at home... of course I have time to be in love unless it's with some jerk that makes me suffer from chronic heartbreak... >.> I'm not the type of person that feels like there's never a time that is not right to fall in love ^-^''' so yeah

It just happens that they're not very strong feelings... Ah, and yes of course I don't want anything from this person. She clearly wouldn't like me back and it's not like I feel that I don't have eyes for anyone else but her so I don't think that would change because I've known her for a long time... but I'm still not sure to what degree I'm suppressing them because I have no other option but to suppress them...

Well, as a rule of thumb, suppressing things usually doesn't turn out well. This is coming from someone that's prone to shelving things that I don't like to think about until I can't take it anymore. Just liking someone with complete sincerity can feel pretty good. Don't let the doubt get in the way of you having a bit of fun.

yes, it can be good even if it doesn't lead to falling in love but I happen to know that there's no way she'd be interested and I believe it's not very possible that she'd be completely cool with me liking her. Very likely she'd be uneasy and I really do appreciate her as a friend... but if she suspects it then I don't think it's good to keep her guessing I should be sincere and that's it. If she has no idea though I think it's better to keep suppressing those feelings because the moment I will be a bit more sweet to her or 'accidentally' throw something flirty she might get suspicious.

omg, I'm going there during the summer!! (July) would you um... like to meet some day??

I study there and I'll be gone back in my hometown after my exams in June :/
Do you have any relatives there, or just go for vacation?

yes, it can be good even if it doesn't lead to falling in love but I happen to know that there's no way she'd be interested and I believe it's not very possible that she'd be completely cool with me liking her.

If there is a chance she is homophobic don't take the chances imo.Unless it's a major crush or you're really in love and can't handle it. Maybe it sounds wrong, since it kinda goes against being open about yourself, but at the same time I believe it's better to keep some things unknown if it is to protect yourself too.
I know in an ideal world, this shouldn't be the case, but we don't live in one anyway.

omg, I'm going there during the summer!! (July) would you um... like to meet some day??

I study there and I'll be gone back in my hometown after my exams in June :/
Do you have any relatives there, or just go for vacation?

;_; nyu nyu... Yeah my aunt lives there :) I lived there for three years too. I'll also be around Ioannina in July ^-^

yes, it can be good even if it doesn't lead to falling in love but I happen to know that there's no way she'd be interested and I believe it's not very possible that she'd be completely cool with me liking her.

If there is a chance she is homophobic don't take the chances imo.Unless it's a major crush or you're really in love and can't handle it. Maybe it sounds wrong, since it kinda goes against being open about yourself, but at the same time I believe it's better to keep some things unknown if it is to protect yourself too.
I know in an ideal world, this shouldn't be the case, but we don't live in one anyway.

no no no, she's not at all, that's not the problem. I actually told her I like girls which is why I think she might have suspected it. But that's she not homophobic doesn't mean anything; she's straight, she'd never touch a woman and I'm not in love with her or feel like I want to be with her... I just like her and I feel attached and safe around her I guess but since I'm suppressing my feelings it's a bit hard to tell to what extent they go. I mean like totally suppressing them most of the time. Before when I had crushes of course I had to suppress my feelings too and not act flirty in certain times but I never suppressed them mentally. I don't allow myself to think of this girl now; but sometimes something random happens when I see her and I get a rush of feelings altogether and it feels as though I'm falling for her for a moment and then go back to just being mildly attracted to her. I'm really confused...

no no no, she's not at all, that's not the problem. I actually told her I like girls which is why I think she might have suspected it. But that's she not homophobic doesn't mean anything; she's straight, she'd never touch a woman and I'm not in love with her or feel like I want to be with her... I just like her and I feel attached and safe around her I guess but since I'm suppressing my feelings it's a bit hard to tell to what extent they go. I mean like totally suppressing them most of the time. Before when I had crushes of course I had to suppress my feelings too and not act flirty in certain times but I never suppressed them mentally. I don't allow myself to think of this girl now; but sometimes something random happens when I see her and I get a rush of feelings altogether and it feels as though I'm falling for her for a moment and then go back to just being mildly attracted to her. I'm really confused...

Sounds like a normal crush to me to be honest. I wouldn't worry too much about it. I think if the feelings are secretely stronger, they come out themselves, even if you try to surpress them. If they are "supressable" they are not too intense imo. At least at the time being.

There are some options with straight girls:
They are curious and might experiment. Then, whether they realise they don't like women at all, or they are closeted bi (or gay) but prefer to not come out, there is a high chance it won't work. Even if they are not actually straight, they just have to accept it themselves first, before being able to have a relashionship.

(Unrelated side story that that came to my mind writing this)
There is an LGBT group in my area. My friend, who doesn't know about me being bi (and who is straight), is friends with one guy from them. And one day, out of nowhere, she tells me she wants to go to that party they were having.
I tried to play it cool, so I went. It was a making out/fooling around party, which admitedly made me feel uncomfortable.
I was sure by that time that no matter the gender, I don't like meeting people this way

no no no, she's not at all, that's not the problem. I actually told her I like girls which is why I think she might have suspected it. But that's she not homophobic doesn't mean anything; she's straight, she'd never touch a woman and I'm not in love with her or feel like I want to be with her... I just like her and I feel attached and safe around her I guess but since I'm suppressing my feelings it's a bit hard to tell to what extent they go. I mean like totally suppressing them most of the time. Before when I had crushes of course I had to suppress my feelings too and not act flirty in certain times but I never suppressed them mentally. I don't allow myself to think of this girl now; but sometimes something random happens when I see her and I get a rush of feelings altogether and it feels as though I'm falling for her for a moment and then go back to just being mildly attracted to her. I'm really confused...

Sounds like a normal crush to me to be honest. I wouldn't worry too much about it. I think if the feelings are secretely stronger, they come out themselves, even if you try to surpress them. If they are "supressable" they are not too intense imo. At least at the time being.

that's helpful! :D yeah I guess you are right! it's never been easy for me to suppress them before. She's... not the 'one' XD to but it bluntly... so since I don't feel that she is it's a bit stupid to stress about it ^-^'''

There are some options with straight girls:
They are curious and might experiment. Then, whether they realise they don't like women at all, or they are closeted bi (or gay) but prefer to not come out, there is a high chance it won't work. Even if they are not actually straight, they just have to accept it themselves first, before being able to have a relashionship.

She's not curious; she once told she wished she was a lesbian but that she couldn't because 'yuck' >.>
yeah but in any case it's not worth it, right?

(Unrelated side story that that came to my mind writing this)
There is an LGBT group in my area. My friend, who doesn't know about me being bi (and who is straight), is friends with one guy from them. And one day, out of nowhere, she tells me she wants to go to that party they were having.
I tried to play it cool, so I went. It was a making out/fooling around party, which admitedly made me feel uncomfortable.
I was sure by that time that no matter the gender, I don't like meeting people this way

are you going to the pride? when is it again? I think you won't be in Thessaloniki around the time, right?
I really like parties and clubs but when it gets like this I don't like it either, though it never happened to me to go to such a party before. But I guess it's kinda gross kissing someone you just met; to me a kiss feels like something you'd do to express that you really feel a lot for a person so if you don't it just seems like... idk, playing? I guess that´s what it is and it´s fine for some people but I would never develop the sort of feelings to kiss someone by just meeting them once (I mean unless we talked all day or sth), like okay maybe I´d want to touch them or flirt or hug them but I don´t know... kissing seems way too much, ah but yeah some people think hugging is way more intimate so I guess =.= but hugs are way more innocent and you can't deny that! ha!

@Dofu:

Yeah... 29 next month... joining you and kanojo in the old folks home soon :P

33 in November for me. =_= I can already feel the wrinkles forming on my face, I'm telling you. Let's do Su a favor and start knitting socks together! xD

Ummm, for a room dedicated to old guns, I'd say quite big lol. At least a couple hundred square feet. They live in a very big house... There are guns all over the walls and gun racks and other things that don't at all follow gun safety recommendations. I guess at least it requires a separate key to get in there...

Boy, I would stay soooo far away from that room. xD I already get a little uneasy when Su leaves her knife lying around unsheathed. But a huge room full of weapons?

Oo oo I want to go there :D Beautiful plus pretty name. I sold the idea to kanojo comparing it to her that way lmao... I can be sly once in a blue moon.

That is sly, indeed. xD Did it actually work?

So. My plans of visiting Su had to be postponed to tomorrow, cause apparently, she's not feeling very well today and her doctor says it's best if she just rests and sleeps it off for today. /sighs/ Oh well. One more day won't kill me. By the way, I forgot to mention that I can act as your mailman again, if you like. If you want me to deliver a message to her, shoot.

last edited at May 15, 2016 5:51AM

My father also just revealed to me, that I have the most ironic name ever. Translated, my full name means "the angel, who follows God's word with an honest heart." /is 100% gay/ doesn't care one bit about religion/ xD

She's not curious; she once told she wished she was a lesbian but that she couldn't because 'yuck' >.>
yeah but in any case it's not worth it, right?

I'm gonna be honest, when someone says they wished they were gay I find it lame. As if they feel sorry for living with the straight privillage.
Sorry if that sounds bad or something <.<

are you going to the pride? when is it again? I think you won't be in Thessaloniki around the time, right?

I thiiink it's around the end of June, but not sure. Tbh I'm not active on these stuff x.x But it's easy to find it if you search on google

My father also just revealed to me, that I have the most ironic name ever. Translated, my full name means "the angel, who follows God's word with an honest heart." /is 100% gay/ doesn't care one bit about religion/ xD

Hmm..that is a good name...better than my name. The shaman told my parents to rename me after the first person they saw passed by the street. They saw a guy passed by first so they got part of my name from his last name. They added the first part of my name to his last name to make it feminine. Well my soul seemed to accept it.

last edited at May 15, 2016 8:25AM

Hmm..that is a good name...better than my name. The shaman told my parents to rename me after the first person they saw passed by the street. They saw a guy passed by first so they got part of my name from his last name. They added the first part of my name to his last name to make it feminine. Well my soul seemed to accept it.

So you were basically named after some random person they saw walking by? That's a bit strange. Is that linked to something your parents believe in? Why would they do that? o_0

Hmm..that is a good name...better than my name. The shaman told my parents to rename me after the first person they saw passed by the street. They saw a guy passed by first so they got part of my name from his last name. They added the first part of my name to his last name to make it feminine. Well my soul seemed to accept it.

So you were basically named after some random person they saw walking by? That's a bit strange. Is that linked to something your parents believe in? Why would they do that? o_0

Yes. It was related to our beliefs. I was named something else but seemed like my soul did not like any of those names. I got sick. The shaman can and said that the should rename me after a random they saw walking by the street.

Hmm..that is a good name...better than my name. The shaman told my parents to rename me after the first person they saw passed by the street. They saw a guy passed by first so they got part of my name from his last name. They added the first part of my name to his last name to make it feminine. Well my soul seemed to accept it.

So you were basically named after some random person they saw walking by? That's a bit strange. Is that linked to something your parents believe in? Why would they do that? o_0

Yes. It was related to our beliefs. I was named something else but seemed like my soul did not like any of those names. I got sick. The shaman can and said that the should rename me after a random they saw walking by the street.

There's a same belief here. If a child gets sick often, they'll change their name because they think that the name is too heavy for the child (?). There's also a culture here, in some areas, where they name their child after the first object they see o.o...

Hmm..that is a good name...better than my name. The shaman told my parents to rename me after the first person they saw passed by the street. They saw a guy passed by first so they got part of my name from his last name. They added the first part of my name to his last name to make it feminine. Well my soul seemed to accept it.

So you were basically named after some random person they saw walking by? That's a bit strange. Is that linked to something your parents believe in? Why would they do that? o_0

Yes. It was related to our beliefs. I was named something else but seemed like my soul did not like any of those names. I got sick. The shaman can and said that the should rename me after a random they saw walking by the street.

There's a same belief here. If a child gets sick often, they'll change their name because they think that the name is too heavy for the child (?). There's also a culture here, in some areas, where they name their child after the first object they see o.o...

Interesting. What kind of ethnic group is that do you know?

That is really interesting. o_o I find beliefs like that really intriguing. There's a kind of mystical beauty about them, that makes me curious. ^_^ One of my friends allegedly "named himself." He said his parents didn't give him any name at first, since they believed if a child doesn't get a name from their parents, their first word will be what they would like to be called. Turned out he kept on saying the syllable "ka" as his first word, so his parents gave him a name, which sounded similar: Karl. He still curses his baby self for coming up with such a boring name. x'D

That is really interesting. o_o I find beliefs like that really intriguing. There's a kind of mystical beauty about them, that makes me curious. ^_^ One of my friends allegedly "named himself." He said his parents didn't give him any name at first, since they believed if a child doesn't get a name from their parents, their first word will be what they would like to be called. Turned out he kept on saying the syllable "ka" as his first word, so his parents gave him a name, which sounded similar: Karl. He still curses his baby self for coming up with such a boring name. x'D

This is also interesting. So what did his parents put on his birth certificate if they didn't name him when he was born?

There are a lot of different beliefs in the world. I also find them interesting too. In my culture after a man married and have a few kids, his in-laws will need to help him pick a new name. Of course his soul has to like it too.

Interesting. What kind of ethnic group is that do you know?

It's Sangihe if I'm not mistaken ><

That is really interesting. o_o I find beliefs like that really intriguing. There's a kind of mystical beauty about them, that makes me curious. ^_^ One of my friends allegedly "named himself." He said his parents didn't give him any name at first, since they believed if a child doesn't get a name from their parents, their first word will be what they would like to be called. Turned out he kept on saying the syllable "ka" as his first word, so his parents gave him a name, which sounded similar: Karl. He still curses his baby self for coming up with such a boring name. x'D

It's interesting, learning how names are given in different countries and ethnics xD. My aunt once told me that she had a friend whose name was "Feces" o.o...and I had a kouhai whose name was "The seventh day".

Interesting. What kind of ethnic group is that do you know?

It's Sangihe if I'm not mistaken ><

Interesting. There are really similar cultures and beliefs.

That is really interesting. o_o I find beliefs like that really intriguing. There's a kind of mystical beauty about them, that makes me curious. ^_^ One of my friends allegedly "named himself." He said his parents didn't give him any name at first, since they believed if a child doesn't get a name from their parents, their first word will be what they would like to be called. Turned out he kept on saying the syllable "ka" as his first word, so his parents gave him a name, which sounded similar: Karl. He still curses his baby self for coming up with such a boring name. x'D

It's interesting, learning how names are given in different countries and ethnics xD. My aunt once told me that she had a friend whose name was "Feces" o.o...and I had a kouhai whose name was "The seventh day".

Some names' meanings are really strange. My name literally means gate. Some others names including cloth, drum, fish, water, cloud, wind, gold, having gold, silver, etc...

This is also interesting. So what did his parents put on his birth certificate if they didn't name him when he was born?

I have no idea, I never asked. xD They just didn't put anything at first, I assume. Or they just put a random alibi name just to have the paper work off their back and then officially renamed him "Karl" when he had chosen his name. That's not a too uncommon practice. o_o Couples, who can't decide on their baby's name do that sometimes.

@Martian:

"The 7th day" is still sort of cool, but "Feces"? Gosh. Poor guy. >_<

Unrelated: (caution: TMI)

That moment when you're one of the oldest ones in a lesbian forum and you somehow manage to reveal, that you hate sex with a dildo and suddenly 3 out of 7 people go "But why? I mean, you're 32, right? Omg!" I'm sorry, did I miss the news that having a sexual preference is related to age? Cause I never got that letter. o_0

Unrelated: (caution: TMI)

That moment when you're one of the oldest ones in a lesbian forum and you somehow manage to reveal, that you hate sex with a dildo and suddenly 3 out of 7 people go "But why? I mean, you're 32, right? Omg!" I'm sorry, did I miss the news that having a sexual preference is related to age? Cause I never got that letter. o_0

Umm. I don't see anything wrong with not wanting to use any kind of sex toys. Like even I wouldn't want to use them. And age doesn't really have anything to do with your sexual preference and such.

Good morning everyone