Page 16's flirting between RemiSato was cute AF

FUCK.

I just realized that on Page 16 that I was supposed to break the word "Underestimating" as "Underesti-mating", not "Underestim-ating".

On a completely unrelated topic, Perfect Sunrise Scans is looking for a QC person. Get in touch with me on Reddit or something if interested.

^ I suppose there are nice ways to break a word in a bubble but I don't think its that big a deal. But I spotted some other stuff if you're interested. Only one is for sure an error- the others might well be fine.

Page 12 panel 1-
'She followed me of HERE own accord' - should be HER. - or maybe 'She followed me here of her own accord'?

Page 19 3rd panel -
'Did that troublesome cat come with you here today?' - it sounds wrong to me- though you can probably get away with it and maybe its not really wrong but its at least non standard word order- it would normally be
'Did that troublesome cat come here with you today?' Or- 'come with you today' if you drop the superfluous 'here'.

And lastly- and this one may not be wrong at all not sure- but where you use the word 'unconscious' (p18,21,25,26) for flan - normally unconscious means knocked out - though it CAN be used interchangeably with 'subconscious' as an adjective when saying something like saying someone had an 'unconscious wish' or desire etc - I think even that is more likely to have 'subconscious' used.

BUT - I don't think you can really use it as a noun like 'the unconscious'. I'm fairly sure it would always be the 'subconscious' when referring to our inner mind that we are not aware of.

I don't know what the original Chinese or Japanese word was ofcourse, and if you'd want to leave it as 'unconscious' if that is what it was, but I think for the English, 'subconscious' seems to work better- at least imo.

last edited at Dec 16, 2019 9:41PM

Page 12:

Dang it! Thanks for spotting it. It was supposed to be "She followed me here of her own accord", and you'll notice that "HERE" doesn't appear in the version that got uploaded. Gee, I wonder where it could have gone?

Page 19:

Now that I think about it, you're right. That's probably an "artifact" left behind from the original translation.

And regarding "un/subconscious", the original Japanese term is "無意識"

I've memorized the hiragana, I kinda understand how particles work, and I know less than half of 1st grade Kyōiku kanji. In other words, I have NO IDEA if "無意識" is better translated as "Subconscious" or "Unconscious". Google Translate and the original English translation render it as "unconscious". The Touhou Wiki page for Koishi (https://en.touhouwiki.net/wiki/Koishi_Komeiji) mainly uses the term "unconscious'" as well.

In short, I think I made the right decision with the information I have available, but I will admit that this is not complete information.

That said, if you look at the original raws, you will find that my usage of "unconscious" ONLY appears in bubbles "無意識" appears. Likewise, you will only see the word "Impulses" where "衝動" appears in the raws, and I was careful to make sure "消" was translated consistently as "erase". When I had my doubts about the accuracy of"消" being "erase", I found a second doujin that translated the same word in a near-similar situation the same way: https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/941575?pool_id=3659 (spoilers for my next project I guess. If anyone wants to proofread that, hit me up).

That said, I ALMOST made the mistake of putting in the word "UnconsciousNESS", which DOES explictly refer to someone being knocked out.

last edited at Dec 17, 2019 8:35PM

Yup I love this pairing and the little sisters too (KoiFlan), but sadly so rare.

i made an account just now to say thank you for picking up the translation in yohane work
the last week i was reading again all of the yohane work in this site, so this is like a huge coincidence
i was even thinking that is a shame nobody is translating his/her other works and maybe i should buy his/her news digital books and pay someone to translate if there is new ones
well anyways thank you man, you put a smile in my face

been really loving this series so far

Would like to see where this goes

D'aww this is nice

What a sweet story. Yohane has some wonderful works. I enjoy them very much.

Sakuya's definitely not fooling me that she barged in on RemiSato by accident.
Also, dat PacchiKoa in afterword.

Btw, for those interested in NSFW(but still totally fluffy) RemiSato + KoiFlan > Rose Heaven by Rasahan.

last edited at Jun 24, 2021 2:39PM

its amazing how well their powers fit together