I'm glad I'm not the only one put off by Asagi Ryuu's artwork. The girl looked way too mature for a 16(?) year old (she said the teacher was 33, twice her age.) I suppose it's going for more realistic, mature looking characters but imo it just looks off-putting

last edited at May 16, 2018 12:09AM

Asagi has a weird habit of randomly derping out on anatomy. I've kind of come to accept it as his quirk.

The dialog in the first half was stilted to the point of it being hard to follow, particularly with their exchanges at school. However, the second half made things a little clearer, & it was actually a rather sweet story. One of Asagi Ryu's better works in my book.

I don't think anybody's arguing that it's confusing, just poorly written. Not like I should be expecting Romeo and Juliet from Asagi Ryuu, I guess, but the first few conversations between our gal pals here barely make sense.

If they barely make sense then it is confusing.

Anyway, Asagi Ryuu is not to blame for the translation being hard to follow.

last edited at May 16, 2018 2:47AM

This artist seriously needs to learn basic anatomy especially since they're drawing hentai(and I assume they're getting paid for it).

IIRC it's rather less pronounced in his older works. Beats me why.

Eh, I thought this was nice. I don't usually like couples with such a big gap, though there are more than a few exceptions to that. lol

last edited at May 17, 2018 2:40PM

I'm not saying I don't understand what's happening, but the way these two characters speak to each other does not even resemble how real people talk.

Almost as if this was some kinda pornography.

Altair posted:

Almost as if this was some kinda pornography.

Even pornography tends to have a more coherent storyline. This is more like having two totally separate conversations that have very little to even do with each other. "What color is the sky?" "George Washington!"

The storyline is coherent. It's purely that the translation doesn't convey enough of the same nuance as the Japanese to be clear.

Kinda suits lots of sex tag for me

Tbh I found the dialouges normal and pretty easy to understand. Maybe it's just me, but in normal converstation with other ppl (that is NOT stranger) (especially my friends and family) we always talk in a cut-off and nonsense way like that.
"School?"
"3"
"Out of?"
"5"
"Barely?"
"Barely."

Other ppl often look at us be like wtf are they talking about.

last edited at May 28, 2018 2:26PM

I kinda didn't understand a thing about what was happening between those two. Except the sex.

The translation or the plot?

Yea, I think the storyline started in media res. It definitely could have used a bit more exposition. Still, I love Asagi Ryu's works, Het and Yuri. And Age Gap is his shtick.

I'm glad I'm not the only one put off by Asagi Ryuu's artwork.

Their art and feeling of proportions are TOO MUCH STRANGE. And in this work proportions are more realistic than in I Fell In Live For The First Time.