I KNEW IT. I'M OLD.

Seriously, only like 5 people at my age or older. SIGH.

I stared at those age charts for 10 minutes and I still don't know how you figured that out. I'm having a lot of trouble understanding it personally.

I assume I'm one of that group though.

22 actually, at the time of the events in the game..... and that's why it's so funny that her dad's always beating up and shooting guys who are leching after her, he's like 'how dare those PEDOS go after my little, little girl!' lol

Hah, well, actually, in his defense, you could say this: claiming that twenty-two is still under the age of consent is not less groundless or arbitrary than any of the other random conventions accepted all round the world.

Honestly, since the brain doesn't completely finish developing until about age 25, give or take, it's actually more sensible than most. If not terribly practical.

^Hard mode: drink once for every SFX in the background.

I'd really appreciate you not trying to give our members alcohol poisoning.

Okay, regarding the age issue. Yes, it can be irritating if you're into age gap and people always keep coming in to say "adults and kids in relationships is wrong!" It can be really hard to see something you enjoy criticized, and you are likely tempted to lash out at them.

Thing is though, 15 really is a child still. And the difference between that and a 30 year old adult is pretty vast still. And if you're a fan of age gap, you're going to have to accept that you're a fan of a controversial subgenre that incorporates something unacceptable in real life. You can claim "it's fiction" all you want, but this is the price of admission, the same as it would be if you were a fan of rape stuff or vore or something. It's what you should expect coming in, all the more when the age is low.

As to the story itself, honestly it doesn't come off as much of a romance to me in the first place. The girl's cofession aside, it otherwise seems pretty bloodless. Her feelings, by her own admission, are based entirely on "you're the only one who was nice to me", while the older woman doesn't seem to have any particular strong feelings at all and has to be convinced into it. She's not looking for romance, and aside from the Magic Kiss That Stirs Feelings™ still doesn't seem to have found it. I guess it would be a cute one-shot, and we've got other ones that run like this on the site already, but I just ain't feelin' it as a couple I want to root for.

Pity there's not more of this.

^No thank you. Negom actually draws good stuff too. If you are offended by the fact that I don't like OCs, fine, I'll not talk about those anymore.

You both escalated "not liking OC's" to an unacceptable degree. The Negom comment ban stands.

Yeah, this ends right now.

wsedoiugly and BugDevil, stop commenting on anything by this artist.

Remember, folks, I said this:

Also, the weather forecast says there will be triggering Loralei comments in the Useless Princesses forum, though they aren't sure if they're trolling or genuine.

And then, wouldn'cha know:

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/useless_princesses_ch13#26

So do this, ffs! Be with Izumi, let Iro be with Nanaki, you can still idolize Nanaki and everyone will be finally happy! Ugh!

I swear to God these girls are so f*cking brainless and afraid of loneliness.

Is there any point to this comment other than to antagonize another member of the forums, BV. That's definitely not a good look.

So knowing this author, it'll start off strong, incorporate some really good ideas and solid characterization, then around the middle it'll kind of lose its energy and wrap up in a tepid sort of more-or-less ending.

Welp, here's my ticket for the ride.

Fairypixie24 gets a day off for continuing to spam off-topic to this discussion.

Please move discussion of film unless it directly relates to A Room For Two to the Dynasty Cafe thread.

Since I have already given a warning about this, I have accordingly removed the last post from both Fairypixie24 and Nene.

Also an interesting tip! try to imagine the point in the story you want to reach clearly before starting writing the beginning, so instead of "A tale of two brothers running from a village" imagine the two brothers taking over a castle and what they would need to do it or why they do it, because it would be so much easier to start walking when you already have a destination, you can take shortcuts or you can even make some detours but because you already have a goal, all the infinite possibilities that could make you crazy and confuse you are limited to a path already... All you gotta do is write your way there.

You can even imagine the ending if taking over the castle is not the climax, but is easier to have an easier goal first like the climax of the first arc.

A good story should have a beginning, middle and an end. Which sounds obvious, but it's amazing how many people sit down and try to write without at least one of those. A short story generally has a destiation to get to, or a problem to solve. You, as the writer, need to know the solution to the problem ahead of time, where the characters start, and how they get from A to B.

In a longer story, you'll want your characters to try to solve the basic problem, but mess it up somehow. In yet longer stories, you'll have your characters start by trying to solve a problem and finding that it's related to a much bigger problem along the way. But the idea is still the same. You've got a starting point, an ending point, and the middle bit is how the points connect.

Also, don't only read stuff that's in your preferred genre. Read all kinds of stuff.

Probably the best advice. I'd also add if you really want to write well, read poetry, no exceptions.

I have a kind of weird blind spot when it comes to poetry where it's hard for me to really absorb it easily. And believe me I've tried, I even took a unit on English poetry in university. But it still just falls out of my head almost immediately.

In addition to reading a lot, I'll add that you should do it with a critical eye. Think of it as going backstage at the theatre, you get to see how the stage is put together and so on.

Also, don't only read stuff that's in your preferred genre. Read all kinds of stuff. Read both professional and amateur stuff. It'll all teach you someting, whether that's what to do or what not to do. Lately I've been going on Archive.org and looking up old pulp magazines from the 1940s and 50s, they're kind of amazing. Terrible in a lot of ways, but impressive in others, and writing pulp is a great way to learn about conflict.

As to more practical advice, here are a few tips.

• Plan things out. Spontenaity is all well and good, but at least plan out your scenes, dialogue, and so forth. Everything needs a purpose in the story. Personally, I use a spreadsheet to keep track, but do what works for you.
• Your first draft is going to be terrible, and that's just fine. It's supposed to be. Think of it the same way as a rough sketch. It's your second and third drafts that will tidy things up and make them shine. Allow yourself to be terrible the first time around, and yes, stray from your plan.
• Don't be afraid to dump things that aren't working. As Stephen King put it, "Kill your darlings".
• Save researching stuff for after you're done with the first draft. By then you'll have a better idea what you need.
• Get to know your characters during the planning phase, but don't get too caught up in trivia. You don't need to know their favourite colour or the names of their stuffed toys when they were nine, but you do need to know how they'd react in different situations. For short stories, don't get too caught up in character descriptions because you don't have the space to waste. You probably won't even describe them at all in your story, but in your character profile devote about 100 words to it just so you know who you're dealing with in a concrete way.
• If you're writing science fiction or fantasy, taking a little extra time beforehand to do some worldbuilding is worth the effort. You don't necessarily have to work out all the details, but enough to make it plausible to a reader living in our world.

There's a pretty good seat of your pants guide to getting a short story off the ground here that I refer to a lot, and you might like this guide to planning out conversations. Good luck!

^ And it's surprising she moved that quickly.

Actually amend that. What I really want to see more of is the mom and aunt.

Yuki still sucks.

And honestly, I stopped caring about the rich girl quite a ways back. I wish they'd get back to the tough sister or the actress or some character who's actually interesting.

To be fair, when it comes to animal kingdom sexual practices, this is one of the less horrifying ones.

me: proposes to gf
also me: ...does this make us lesbians?
gf: surprised gasp

Jeeze, you don't just drop a revelation like that on someone out of the blue.

Spam deleted.

BV, seriously never pull a stupid stunt like that again.

Nezchan said

Mostly it's pointing things out here or DMing/pinging me on Discord (same username).

But yeah, I generally skim through all the new messages at least once a day, often more than that.

Ah, the joy of unemployment.

Honestly, it doesn't take as long as you'd think. I generally do it while having breakfast or something.

Can anyone tell me what's up with the uniform inside the paper bag on the last page of Ch. 4? Or is it just me overanalyzing that there's something about it? I mean, Haru's aunt gave Midori a paper bag right? Is it connected? Oh gee, lol.

I was wondering about that. I suspect it may be either the uniform from her mom's old school, or perhaps her mom's old uniform that was kept all this time. Either way, leaving it behind with a stated desire to change makes some sense.

A day off for Brain Damage for trolling. Again.

Do you sample the comments or rely on others griping to you about trolls through some channel/method I don’t know about?

If you speed read through the comments, I’m impressed. If there’s a method to report users going off the deep end, I’d like to know... thanks.

Mostly it's pointing things out here or DMing/pinging me on Discord (same username).

But yeah, I generally skim through all the new messages at least once a day, often more than that.

Wait wait if we're making demands, I want De Vito as the alien girl :I

Then Gwendoline Christie should be Hino and Ellen Page as Nagafuji

Hey Netflix, you're leaving money on the table here!

Netflix adaptation?

a Netflix show?
or maybe a movie adaptation?

Maybe it'll be as good as Death Note, lol.

Only if Adachi is played by Willem Dafoe

Done! It'll air in September.