I grew up with parents like hers, I remember feeling horrible every time they would hit me and later pull out the "I put a roof over your head" card because it made me feel super guilty and spoiled, which just led to me downplaying all my problems later on. I still love them of course, and things have gotten better over the years, but man, stuff like that does so much more harm to children than it may seem,
Meanwhile Tong Tongs mom is amazing, screw Mr Xie!