Harems are kinda just a symptom of a general orientation towards male-centric garbage escapism in anime/light novels/a lot of manga in general. It's definitely kinda disgusting when I see it. At the same time, I did try out a number of shoujo mangas in the past but eventually began to get disgusted with the weak and emotionally immature/dense/useless main characters. I still keep up with a few, but het has definitely lost its sparkle for me.
I think the basic appeal of yuri is cute girls. You can just never have enough of cute girls being together. Also, for guys, the sexual aspect of yuri is a bit like porn without the feelings of exploitation or guilt. You can appreciate the girls without feeling like you're objectifying them.
There's also the emotional intimacy. Het romance is so boring. It's always so reductionist. Rather than personalities, they are fantasies about roles: 'men are like this, and women are like this'. Father and mother, dick and vagina, the biological connection just boils down to that. What is the meaning in a man and a woman being joined together? Fundamentally they are different, can never understand each other; once their roles are finished, the connection falls apart.
That was a bit of an exaggeration, its not like men and women cannot have a meaningful relationship together. However it's the real irony of het that in the consummation of a relationship is when it becomes the most cliche, the most personality-less, the most role-defined, black and white. The endpoint of het is to destroy precisely anything beautiful which came before. The closer it gets, the more impure.
In a yuri relationship, sex is neither the endpoint of the relationship, nor something which has to be denied. Once/if love is established, it can be indulged in fully without undermining the underlying emotional connection. And neither does indulging in that emotional connection turn someone inwards, away from the world. While a heterosexual relationship protects itself by becoming more defined, by closing off parts of oneself, more fully embracing the roles--in yuri the couples' growth must be fundamentally different, with each partner expanding to reach new boundaries.
Yuri is hope. And het is gravitas, despair, the weight of being bound to things like flesh and our degenerating physical bodies. Anyway, the main idea is that yuri is the only vanilla I can believe in nowadays. Not that I plan on turning gay anytime soon.
last edited at Jun 1, 2013 10:58PM