"they were in daily contact" yeah for like a week? Maybe a month tops? It's easier to confide to a stranger on the internet sometimes rather than a person you know irl. You can't really count their brief internet interaction as a deep bonding. They were just getting to know each other. I've seen comments on the internet of people talking about their issues with strangers(like on YouTube comments). It really doesn't mean much. And learning about Sei's work doesn't need a lot of interaction either. She literally states her occupation in her dating profile, so it would be one of the first topics of conversation to come up.

The fact that she could talk to Sei without awkwardness and reservation meant a great deal to Aya. She felt someone out there cared enough to message her every day. It seems like it’s not a big deal to some but for Aya who had a desperate need for connection, this was enough to establish a bond.

People can feel strong connections others through the internet. Many people, older and more experienced than a girl like Aya, are scammed copious amounts of money by significant others they meet through social media, people that they’ve never met irl nor even video chatted with.

It all depends on the person, their level of susceptibility, how in need of attention/company they are.

I get if you like their "relationship". It's more subjective. But they don't know each other for a long time, especially long enough time for Aya to feel like her only purpose in life is Sei.

Regardless of whether or not I like their relationship, it’s impossible to quantify how long it would take to create a strong emotional bond with someone.

Logic and emotion often don’t coincide.

There is such a thing as whirlwind romance. People get married after meeting for just a week. People claiming love at first sight or knowing they were going to marry their significant other just after one date. There’s a dating show on Netflix called Love is Blind where people go on dates and have like 5 days to decide whether or not they propose to someone....

Aya’s a lonely teen with nothing but schoolwork and a sociable childhood friend. Her parents are never home and she’s mostly left to her own devices.

Sei brought forth all these new things for Aya; comfort, mystery, curiosity, pleasure, pain, etc. So it’s only natural for Aya to believe that everything she associates with Sei, the sex filled dramatic life she’s currently living, will be gone the minute Sei leaves.

last edited at Apr 26, 2020 5:55AM

Agh, that was for five seconds. And then Sei literally threw herself on Aya the first time they met.
I mean, it's not unbelievable why Aya likes her that much and so quick,but the phrase "she is my reason to be alive" is just ridiculous imo.

Also we see that Aya has a problem with socializing and opening up to people, so that makes it even weirder how she suddenly made that stranger her reason to live. I think this needed to be developed way slower, because even though there are reasons why she feels that way, they're not convincing and enough for me.

Like I said, Aya established a friendship through their messaging. They were in daily contact before they met. Though it isn’t stated how long they were messaging before they met, the fact that Aya feels comfortable enough to mention her status as an outcast in school, that she goes to Sei after she threatens to cut her off because she doesn’t want to lose her, and that Sei feels comfortable enough to make that demand, means that there’s been enough time to establish an emotional connection.

Showing all their messaging would have been boring so we got a few pages as a montage to get the gist of things.

Haruki tried approaching Aya a lot, but Aya keeps rejecting her. It's not easy to talk about the fact that she pried on her phone but then discovered a whole other mess. It started out as something smaller,but then she got caught up in a more complicated situation which made it harder to tell the truth. Still, I'm not saying what she did was right, but she is the most likable character of the three for me, so it sucks how the author is making her problematic on purpose so they make sure the readers ship the other two. A kind of logic like Sei is problematic, but Haruki is no angel either, so we might as well ship Aya with Sei since Sei is the main character and we are more familiar with her.

Her reaction to a suggestive photo of her childhood friend in post coital phase sent by her much older lover should have been to protect Aya, regardless of the strain it might put on their friendship, yet instead she pushes herself unto Aya.

Her friend could have a sex tape but she’s more worried about why Aya did that with Kuro and not her.

Though I understand why she did all those things. I get her feelings and her motivations. She’s realizing that her concern is actually jealousy. And suddenly experiencing her own sexual awakening and the fact that she’s been in love with Aya... that she’s been the only person there for Aya yet she wasn’t enough and Aya went to look for someone else.

I get Haruki, Sei, Aya, and even Mochida.

The author pretty much made all the characters problematic, not necessarily because they want Sei and Aya to end up together, (I would not be surprised if Aya ends up single because there’s also that coming of age element to this) but because that’s pretty much the formula for a romantic drama.

All the characters are messed up and make bad decisions. They are given back stories to explain their trauma to give insight on their motivations.

Usually, no one has the right to stand on the pedestal of moral high ground.

Yet all are still within the realm of redeemable.

Except for Yoru but that might change if we get a back story from her POV.

last edited at Apr 26, 2020 12:40AM

This is so funny. “I’d lose my only reason to be alive”, my ass. Where did the romance even come from? Like, there was a girl... She wanted some friends... She met a woman who harassed her online and offline, that pissed her off... Then they had huge amount of sex, just because Aya couldn’t and didn’t know how to refuse... That’s all, where’s love, where’s “reason to be alive”? Did I miss something?
The sujet is extremely forced with this romance thing. There was no development of it, it came out of nowhere. So far it’s just sophisticatedly drawn porn. Which would be okay if it wasn’t so pretentious.

That's exactly what I was thinking too. Maybe I'd be more lenient on the "extremely forced" part and simply call it too fast and baseless when you stop to think deeper about it (the bar for a normal paced development is really low for romance manga anyway) Like boo hoo, you know her for like a month?

It's weird because I'm super into this type of angsty relationships, but this one? I just don't care about rooting for them. I guess it really is because there is not much of development between them. There is no love, just Sei who desperately and sickly holds into her first love and Aya who is going to end up getting contaminated and becoming the same as Sei(although I would bet the author will flip it over in the end)

Lonely teenage girl with extremely low self esteem falling for the first stranger to ever show interest in her does not feel that far fetched to me.

The fact that she went to meet Kuro at the thought of losing her means she’d already developed a strong emotional connection with Kuro over text.

Aya had nothing and then comes Sei, who’s interested in her, who took the time to message her daily just to ask about her, who sparks her own curiosity, who awakened her sexual desires, the combination of all that makes it easy for Sei to become her reason to be alive.

Sei took most of her physical firsts, the milestones usually associated with romance, her deriving pleasure when engaging in said acts, how Sei shares her frustrations, how she opens up about her painful past, how Sei had contacted her when Math teacher cornered her into a night out, how Aya in turn runs to Sei after fighting with Haruki.

All that deepened the connection that wasn’t physical, in Aya’s part, to begin with. Aya had seen Sei as her friend prior to the sexual advances. She had already felt there was trust between them and then came an unspoken establishment that they were each other’s source of comfort.

All that was enough for inexperienced Aya to get sucked in.

She tried to establish barriers but after she witnessed how broken Sei really is, Aya no longer can delude herself.

She’s affected. She failed to detach herself from Sei.

She feels trapped, knowing she’s too invested to walk away and realizes Sei will have no problem severing their ties, leaving Aya alone in her boring world once more.

The sex scenes are actually intense and well drawn. The two characters are good looking. But it still doesn't make them appealing to me as a couple.

The art is definitely amazing.

Also I like Haruki more despite she crossing the line of Aya's privacy (which is wrong). What Sei did with the nudes was creepy af and she deserved to be called out. Haruki's actions don't just come from jealousy, I think first and foremost she cares about Aya and the situation she is in. Imagine discovering your minor friend dating a pretty older adult who secretly takes naked pics of her and acts all smug and provocative to you.

You really don’t see much of Aya’s anything. Her face is covered by her bangs. Just her bare shoulders are exposed. The sheet’s covering most of her so I wouldn’t call it a nude. The photo is highly suggestive for sure.

Haruki was not satisfied with what Aya had told her so she invaded Aya’s privacy.

Even at the start, when she found out Aya was texting someone, she never once asked Aya if she’s okay with what’s going on. Never asked if she’s happy with Kuro. She just told Aya not to meet him. Then she finds herself irritated because Aya is doing the thing that she feared would eventually happen.

Aya is drifting apart from her and she can’t take it.

When she found out who Sei was and what they had done, her initial reaction wasn’t to express her concern over Aya’s wellbeing. It was to satisfy the jealous raging beast inside her so it’s a little hard for me to believe her primary motivations were concern for Aya’s wellbeing.

If she was angry because Aya wasn’t taking care of herself or because she was taken advantage of by a teacher, she would have never assaulted Aya. She does this because she felt she should have been the one with Aya.

If she’s so concerned about her friend and wants Aya to stay away, why not tell her what she did and show Aya the picture Sei sent? Maybe she eventually will do it, but if she doesn’t then I’m inclined to believe it’s because doing so conflicts with Haruki’s ultimate desire; to ensure the version of Aya that she’s grown up with stays by her side.

Hm hm, quite the chapter
1. Aya's frustration converted into top energy and lust

Definitely appreciated that.

1. Sei is most emotionally vulnerable when it concerns Yoru and Aya doesn't know how to deal with the baggage, she'd rather avoid avoid an emotional connection

Yes but maybe her acting roughly after remembering her encounter with Haruki could mean that she’s at the very least worried she’ll lose her source of relief so soon.

1. Aya recognises that physical intimacy isn't enough, whoops

Though I think Aya realizes that’s it’s too late. She’s made an emotional connection with Sei and cries as she accepts Sei is incapable of having one with her because she’s too hung up on Yoru.

1. Aya was clearly disgruntled when she abruptly left and Sei didn't really care or think much of it, even though she noticed tbh

She kind of looks curious but then her phone rings.

1. Aya's always the one running to meet her. When they first met at Sei's apartment. When she returned Sei's clothes. When Aya went to look for her at her school. When she went to find her when Sei wanted to peace out from drinking with the math teacher

Like a moth to the flame. Well, Aya hasn’t really given Sei a reason to come after.

But the moment Sei got that text she went running to meet Yoru. No one can ever replace the emotional damage Yoru has on Sei tbh

I’m hoping she’ll realize how shitty Yoru has been to her and move on. Though I keep telling myself that the probability of that is probably close to 0.

I need to stop myself from hoping for a happy ending.

While Kozuka says she regrets it at the very beginning, ultimately the turn-out is leaning towards her having enjoyed it and slowly opening up to a gay relationship. She has not experienced any emotional trauma from it.

She expresses regret after she realizing she’d somehow hurt Ritsuka’s feelings.

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch5_2#4

Ritsuka on the other hand has been emotionally hurt and self-loathing because of what she did and basically recited the title directly. I think it is quite clever how the author misled who the title was refering to.

Kozuka’s remembering more and more about that night. That blurred part of the speech in chapter 6 will probably cause Kozuka to regret something else though.

I always assumed the possibility that the ‘it’ could mean more than just their sexual encounter. The story definitely has potential for more than just 21 (or should I say 42 since it’s in halves) chapters and the vagueness of the ‘it’ sets up for future shenanigans and further exploration of backstory.

We are given elements of where the characters could also have experienced regret.

Ritsuka had girlfriends/dated girls in high school. Did something happen to turn her into the anti social loner she is now? Does Kozuka regret quitting her job for whatever reason she had?

And after Neighbor shared her back story, I maintain the over all theme of the story could be about the multitude of regrets the characters have and the way they cope/fix/deal with ‘it’, one regret at a time, so they can better their lives.

Though it could be as simple as what you believe.

I do have a tendency to over think and make things more complicated than they have to be in terms of story telling and character development.

It really all depends on how long the series will be.

Uhm... it's nearly impossible not to notice someone is sloshed, especially when you kiss them. She might not have expected her to be black-out drunk, but the statement "guess you were kinda drunk" implies that she noticed beforehand.

I don’t doubt she tasted the alcohol but that doesn’t mean necessarily mean Ritsuka knew Kozuka was drunk. The taste and scent of alcohol lingers after just one drink.

For me the way she notices just how many empty beer cans after waking up and the “guess” and “kinda” sets it up as a post realization, like it’s an afterthought due to Kozuka’s morning after reaction and the way Ritsuka notices her surroundings, not prior confirmation of knowledge.

A “Guess you were that drunk.” would be more convincing for me.

Like I said; Ritsuka was probably too busy indulging in Kozuka’s warmth to really try and figure out if Kozuka was indeed in the right state of mind.

I interpret that statement as an emotional defense, rather than a reasonable belief. But that is up to you I suppose.

I don’t think she’d be defensive if she had known earlier that she did anything wrong. I read it more like desperation, Ritsuka trying to convince/remind Kozuka that she didn’t take advantage like some sleazy predator because Kozuka is insisting there was no way she’d have said yes since she only likes men.

Though I understand how one could interpret it as Ritsuka trying to cover up her shame.

I don’t read her as that type of character. She seems more likely to recognize her mistakes and wallow in misery than the type to deny her wrongdoings.

Look... even if you believe that she did not notice she was drunk, however unrealistic that may be, it does not change the fact that Kozuka was not capable of consent. It is still a huge mistake that Ritsuka regrets. Because she did not want to take advantage or abuse the one she loves.

Exactly. From what I’ve read Ritsuka is the type of person who wouldn’t do something untoward as knowingly taking advantage of the woman she loves, which ultimately reinforces my belief that she didn’t know Kozuka was drunk when they had sex.

Her character seems like she’s used to prejudice due to her sexuality so it didn’t feel like she would perpetuate a negative stereotype by purposely taking advantage of a down in the dumps drunken straight girl.

She would not push for anything Kozuka would be uncomfortable with because she loves her so much.

Also, according to Ritsuka’s account of that evening Kozuka was responsive when they slept together. Which is probably why she didn’t doubt Kozuka’s lucidity.

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch01#10

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch01#16

And I’m not trying to change your mind. That’s not my intention at all. I’m just trying to have a healthy discussion about how I came to certain conclusions so thank you for your responses.

Overall I enjoy the story and can’t wait to meet Fang Girl. Wouldn’t it be funny if she was one of the girls Ritsuko dated?

You know this is kind of out of the blue..but how many more chapters do you think this series were have before it ends?

Depending on how much Flower Child want to strech it. Maybe 2 or 3 volumes, considering it's 5 chapter per volume then maybe between 10 and 15 chapters, more probably 15 chapter .

At the same time, I don’t know how much more my heart can take anymore so I’d be okay with it ending so soon.... but then it’s so good that a part of me doesn’t want it to end.

How messed up it’s gonna get all depends on how many chapters there will be.

They’ll probably announce chapters ahead of its ending, maybe they’ll do it at the start of which ever volume would be last.

Understandable and justified are two completely separate concepts. Haruki's actions are understandable because she's a ball of hormone-addled jealousy. She is not justified in anything she has done so far, however. She's just as awful for her actions as Sei is for her own.

I also believe that to be true. Every character here is flawed. Their motivations are understandable yet they’re all inexcusable. Still, I can’t help but empathize with all of them.

Am I the only one who likes this story?? I find it quite interesting to read ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Definitely not the one. : D

On a side note, am I the only one who won’t be surprised if this ends tragically? I’m kinda expecting character death now.......

last edited at Apr 25, 2020 2:47PM

Do you not understand that a person cannot legally consent while drunk? It is not exactly rape, but it is not consensual. This is not about prostitution, because if she had been sober Kozuka would never have done it. Ritsuka abused her vulnerable state (faced with eviction, having no alternatives and being drunk) to have sex with her. This is even acknowledged by herself. The title of the story itself is about her regret of having done it against Kozuka's will.

Both characters regret the encounter. Landlady regrets asking her to do it in the first place while Kozuka obviously regrets doing it, but her later regret will be not remembering properly/being a pillow princess or to that effect.

This is flat out wrong. Ritsuka literally acknowledged that it was wrong because Kozuka was drunk. She absolutely knew that she was drunk too and couldn't legally consent while she had sex with her.
https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch01#6

I don’t remember Landlady admitting that she knew Kozuka was nearly blackout drunk when she asked for sex. I only know she accepts that Kozuka was shit faced drunk after Kozuka stated she doesn’t remember what happened.

The first panel has Ritsuka noticing the drinks. The second panel has her scratching her head saying “guess you were kind of drunk,” which for me means before/during the sexual encounter, she wasn’t really paying attention to her surroundings (I mean she didn’t take the time to notice all the beer since she was busy fondling those f cups) and genuinely believed Kozuka was lucid enough for consent not to be impaired.

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch01#7.

She insists that Kozuka consented, which leads me to think that at the time of said sexual encounter, she definitely thought Kozuka was coherent enough to agree.

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch6_2#6

I don’t take it to mean Ritsuka knew Kozuka was bombed when she asked. For me, Landlady acknowledges that Kozuka was in that state because Kozuka had repeatedly declared her impairment and has mentioned she only likes men prior to Chapter 6’s exchange. It is clarification that she believes she’s shitty for what happened because Kozuka turned out to be shit faced drunk but it doesn’t necessarily mean she knew at the time about Kozuka’s stupor. But now she knows Kozuka regrets the counter and she regrets causing pain for the person she loves.

After glancing that chapter again, I noticed blurry speech and the fact that she had the contract ready in that flashback. Could it be that Ritsuka had been joking but then drunk Kozuka hadn’t comprehended that and only focused on the “have sex with me.”?

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch6_2

Also, Kozuka admits that she hugged Ritsuka after the proposition, so perhaps Ritsuka was too distracted by the fact that her love was holding her to properly inspect Kozuka’s state of mind.

https://dynasty-scans.com/chapters/even_if_it_was_just_once_i_regret_it_ch6_2#2

But maybe you’re right and I missed something. I may need to re read the whole thing. But so far, based on what I’ve read/remember, my interpretation is that Ritsuka didn’t know Kozuka’s impaired consent drunk state when Kozuka took her up on her offer.

last edited at Apr 25, 2020 8:52AM

PEople! CALM DOWN! this is fictional yuri.

Yeah, it's just a cute fictional little yuri story which is exactly why it drives me nuts when I see people screeching about rape and extortion particularly when neither are actually even in the story to begin with.

Calling it extortion/rape is definitely excessive. It's not like Landlady threatened to evict her if she didn't have sex with her nor did she harass her into submission... Kozuka put it out there with "I'll do anything". Pretty sure Landlady would have proposed something tamer if she hadn't uttered those words. And Landlady believed there to be consent, even was hurt and upset when Kozuka implied there wasn't, because she didn't know Kozuka was drunk and incapable of realizing/remembering her actions.

last edited at Apr 24, 2020 8:12PM

Hana Ni Arashi is a Romantic Comedy so of course there will be discussions regarding characters. I should clarify that I meant genres containing Romance and or Drama will ultimately suffer from the scalpel of readers. But if it's just a comedy by it self then people tend to just release a chuckle and move on with their lives.

Wow, if I have been understood as being against “discussion regarding characters” I need to take up another language.

Perhaps I misread but I took your previous reply as you basically saying that I was wrong because people also comment on comedies like Hana Ni Arashi. I was merely explaining that anything containing elements of romance and or drama will ultimately garner dissection of characters.

I was not implying that you are against discussions.

As I said, questions about characters, and moral judgments about their actions, are fundamental to reading stories. When the entire conversation revolves around debating “she’s good/she’s bad/she’s terrible,” or worse, “This story depicts certain bad behavior, therefore it advocates for this behavior in real life,” the conversation rarely Illuminates anything about the story itself.

Stories are usually character driven so that's understandable.

last edited at Apr 24, 2020 5:32PM

I would refer you to the Hana ni Arashi folder, where discussions of “who’s right/who’s wrong/who should apologize” can take up page after page in reference to one of the airiest (and most delightful) fluffballs going.

Hana Ni Arashi is a Romantic Comedy so of course there will be discussions regarding characters. I should clarify that I meant genres containing Romance and or Drama will ultimately suffer from the scalpel of readers. But if it's just a comedy by it self then people tend to just release a chuckle and move on with their lives.

But you’re right that it’s when drama timidly rears its head that such eruptions tend to happen.

With this angst-fest, well, . . .

I hope for Aya and Sei but that's probably not going to happen.... I wouldn't be surprised if Aya ends up alone.

Everyone reads stories differently. Some people completely detach the story from reality, others read it with real life on mind.
I don't see how the later should be frowned upon more. A lot of stories are trying to pass a morale in the end too. Some readers can even take example for their real life situations from stories. If you are not one of them, good. But that doesn't mean everyone shouldn't read it in the realistic way either.

In the wdtfs fandom, the love antagonist Seju was often criticized for her character. I liked her but I didn't get offended if someone else didn't. Everyone has the right to read a story differently. If you disagree, it's more productive to point out the reasons and arguments why rather than complaining about the ones who disagree.
And personally I'm just tired of having to excuse some characters' actions and certain situations because it's a fictional story.
Fifty shades was a shit story with a creepy love interest and people got to point that out. Why should it be different for mangas?

I get sucked into the discussions because I genuinely would like to have a rational conversation about the story and characters. Then when I read, some times I wonder whether or not I missed something in the story. It is a bit frustrating because it feels like people just blatantly ignore major key points, dialogue, actions, etc. because they want so badly for their character to have the morale high ground so they can remain 'the best' in their eyes. I understand that type of bias exists but it still irritates me from time to time, probably because we already deal with that stuff IRL outside of these forum pages.

Speaking only for myself, I’ve been surprised to find that so many readers don’t seem to care very much about stories as stories, (i.e., the creation of narrative works of art) and basically see stories as more-or-less transparent containers for imaginary people, whose actions readers then get to pass moral judgments on.

Hence all the discussion of which characters are “bad people,” or which one’s motivations justify their actions, or who is a criminal, etc.

Such judgments are part of any reading of characters, of course. But what that’s all that there is, (especially for stories like this one, where there’s no right-acting moral center character, and where all the characters are deeply flawed and make unwise decisions), forum discussions often become a moralizing merry-go-round, with readers choosing up sides “for” or “against” certain characters. And that often ends up not having much to do with the story that’s actually being told by the author.

Personally, I think people tend to dissect depending on genre. For comedies I don't really see much comments on character's motivations and things but it seems different when it concerns drama and romance. Mostly I think these types of stories mean to offer more than entertainment and escape. The more serious subjects tend resonate stronger emotions with people, leading to all these discussions about morality and whatnot.

I like to understand characters, their motivations and pain and experiences, because they are the ones who can ultimately make a story different enough to stand out.

Also, what more can we expect from the internet? It's basically where people can enjoy the freedom of speaking out without any serious repercussions.

Too bad that i don't believe Serenata will come back to the thread. You can see in the spanish thread that they seem offensed that the english readers don't seem to see the manga like them. I don't know why they don't even try to explain. Althought i believe it's because are not nice with Sei or Aya and worse, some even defend Haruki.I don't hold any grudge on my fellows hispanophons yuri comrads but they seem to have a problem with how peoples comments this one.

That’s sad since we seem to have a common mind set about the story and characters. There are a lot of people defending/siding with Haruki and I get why it’s frustrating and even disappointing when you find out you’re in the minority, that what seems super clear and concise since it’s spelled out on the pages are still impossible to be understood by who you felt were your peers.

That reason is definitely another valid one. I don't know though, I feel like she definitely is that bad heh. It seems to me that all her smiles and cuddly stuff are just more ways to manipulate Aya. Perhaps she's genuinely happy in some cases though like when Aya came over in the most recent chapter... or when she fucked with Haruki. I sure hope that she does legitimately fall for Aya at some point though.

I’m definitely not claiming she’s a saint but she seems more like she got screwed over so she’s lashing out. And the fact that we are getting flashbacks about her life with Yoru leads me to believe it wasn’t just confessions that were rejected. Yoru seems like the type to do things to keep Sei on her hook.

Haruki herself isn’t an innocent victim. She stuck her nose in the cookie jar and got caught up in a mouse trap. She invaded Aya’s privacy, just like Sei did when she sent that soft core, I say that because Aya wasn’t really showing her shit she had a sheet across her boobs, picture to Haruki who isn’t acting out of concern but self preservation. She has said she doesn’t want Aya to change and wants Aya to stay just where only she can reach her.

I know Sei is using Aya and yes she manipulated Aya to a certain degree but it’s ultimately diminishing Aya’s own choices.

Aya chose to go on a dating app, even lied about her age just so people would feel comfortable with approaching her, and also knew that Sei wasn’t wrong to ultimately reject her if she said no. Let’s not forget, she seemed to be expecting to match up with a guy so I’m fairly certain she knew there would be some Sexual advances thrown her way. Perhaps not consciously but Aya has proven she’s not stupid or entirely naive. There’s no way Sei could have manipulated her into observing Sei at her school.

The author has set it up to show that Aya is craving to break out of her monotonous lonely world. She knows Sei is using her but she feels she’s getting something out of being Sei’s replacement while for Sei, she has some one there for her. She even got Aya her own set of table ware which lead me to think Sei doesn’t have a habit of just picking up random women on line to bang at her place though I could be wrong.... They’re having more interactions that have less to do with sex and more for comfort and security, which is what both need.

Sei’s surroundings at school aren’t great. The students are kind of assholes and she has that teacher after her... it’s not all rainbows and unicorns for her so I think there’s a reason the author has taken the time to depict how miserable Sei’s own life is.

Anyway I don’t think she’s completely irredeemable at this point in the story.

She really should just tell everyone about Kuro and get her fired... it seems that she's not really a bad person (or as bad as everyone else anyway), so perhaps she doesn't want to go quite that far. It seems that sharing this teen goss with Haruki hasn't really helped her yet, at least in a way that she could have predicted. I was thinking she was hoping that Haruki would support Aya and ensure that she stays in the relationship for longer, but it seems that is not the case. Mochida definitely doesn't seem manipulative based on what we've seen so far, but she's definitely been smiling evilly a lot, so I thought she was up to something.

She doesn’t seem to have those kinds of designs yet. She’s not a bad person. Just totally immature. Though I think firing will be her ultimate goal which if you ask me is fucked up because she’s not doing it to protect her fellow students she’s going to do it just to get Sei away from Math Teacher.

It seems like it's all just baseless rumors at this point since I recall the girls were saying in one of the earlier chapters that they thought Kuro was looking at them in a pervy way or whatever. It would be interesting if she did date someone before though I haven't really seen any indications of that yet.

It seems like the girl with the lollipop was the one who instigated that whole conversation. She was the one that suggested Sei wanted them and then followed up with saying that she heard the rumor, which means she had prior knowledge about Sapphic Sei and that’s probably what led her to believe that Sei was perving on them.

On a side note, I thought that woman at the end of Chapter 5.5 was Aya until the end and I was like "Wait, since when was Aya a mangaka? And why is she named FLOWERCHILD now?" It was only at the end that I realized it was the real-life backstory for Warikitta (what shall we abbreviate this to, I wonder? WariKan? I don't quite know how these anime abbreviations work, but that seem similar to stuff like YagaKimi and whatever anyway).

WariKan sounds good.

last edited at Apr 24, 2020 12:35AM

Ah no i mean literally, the same comment was posted by Faust, both on Mangadex and Dynasty. I don't complain, i just pointed it out. I also often post similar comments between Mangadex and Dynasty

Oh I didn’t think you were complaining. I get it. People post the same thing twice because they know that there are some who visit only one site and not both so they’d like everyone to read what they have to say and get feedback from all kinds of people.

last edited at Apr 23, 2020 10:05PM

More or less for what i've seen. There is even some same comments both here and Mangadex

It’s expected that there’ll be similar topics being brought up again and again, even by the same people. If the repetitiveness is annoying to some people then perhaps it’s best to just stick to one forum. Otherwise, be prepared for repetition.

Just because you read it twice doesn’t mean the same for everyone else.

Why people end up thinking that stories are "how to live" guides... Or that there's only one way to make a story, the virtuos one and things need to be black or white.

The gray area is too broad for most people to understand. It’s easier and people love easy. They bask in simplicity. Also, we are conditioned to think there’s only two sides and there’s no way to justify ‘wrong’ acts.

You know what, I will just drop this entire thread, I rather discuss in mangadex or literally any other website about this manga....like I said, its the same over and over and over again.

Haven’t been on mangadex so I wouldn’t know what’s being discussed there. Is it virtually the same things?

last edited at Apr 23, 2020 9:09PM

I think it’s more or less in line with what we’ve seen of Sei up to this point. She stays seething in the closet in order to keep her livelihood intact, then engages in the most toxic sorts of relief to destress.

Her methods are corrupt and what she's doing with these three underage girls is certainly deplorable but I can't really say that using sex to vent out your frustrations is toxic. It is unhealthy that she's using Aya as a replacement for Yoru but what makes it despicable is that Aya was a 15 year old innocent virgin. But for Mochida and Haruki, that whole confrontation with Haruki makes me think she could just be convincing herself of her betterment. Now, she is the one who's being chased by people other people want...

Yet I can't help but feel she's not doing this for amusement. It's almost like she's doing it out of anger. Their situations are not unlike her own. She probably went through the same with Yoru and perhaps there's a part of her that hates her self because she thinks she's equally, if not more so, as pathetic as they are.

Also, I don't think she was lying about wanting someone (Though I'm Lysol percent sure she's talking about females only so sorry Math Teacher) to love her. At the moment she just prefers it be Yoru.

In this case, when Mochida tries to hold her sexuality over her head, Sei realizes that she essentially holds all of the power in that moment - they’re alone, Mochida is seen as a goof-off, and there’s a degree of sexual threat too - and decides to engage in some pretty juvenile one-upping. She’s basically flexing a “yeah, I am; who the fuck are you even going to tell?” It’s very in the vein of traditional abuser tactics, like a lot if Sei’s behavior.

But the fact that Mochida, someone who might be on the bottom of the social pyramid, has even heard about the rumor of her girl loving tendencies is a testament that the rumor has a strong following. Meaning there's a high chance Mochida will be believed by her superficial school mates. Also when Aya ends up actually visiting Sei's school there were students around. True they were alone in the room with only Mochida hearing but a lot of people could have seen her bring Aya into the faculty room so at this point it wouldn't take much to convince others about Sei's sapphic inclinations. Unless of course Mochida has a history of crying wolf. And seeing how easily Kuro recognizes Aya's uniform there would be no reason for her to believe that it would be impossible for Mochida to investigate and share details confirming Aya's existence and their connection.

Besides, Sei doesn't really seem like she's seen as an authority figure at school. How many high school students tease their teachers about dressing like old ladies or even discuss their sex/romantic life with them?

But in terms of juvenile one uppery, I can see Sei doing this just to flaunt the fact that Math Teacher wants her but she will never want him, effectively taunting Mochida about how she has to exert effort to capture his attention while all Sei has to do is stand in the same room for him to come panting after her.

From how she’s been presented my take is just that it was typical teen goss combined with a bit of wanting to badmouth the woman her crush is crushing on to clear her nerves. I don’t really see Mochida being quite so manipulative; if she sabotages Sei it’ll likely be a decision she makes in the moment.

Second on that wanting to talk smack about Sei with someone.

How did that rumor about Sei even start? Was she caught by one of her students on a date or did she date one of her students? Because if it's the latter, then she's probably not afraid of unemployment.

I know she said she didn't choose to work there but she's been there a while so if she's that miserable, surely she can ask for a transfer or look for a job somewhere else? It makes me think that she's not just hiding for fear of becoming unemployed, it's more like she wants to stay at that all girl school so she can keep checking out their goods. Almost like she's punishing herself or she just doesn't want to move on. She said her self that Yoru was a flashy girl, as was proven with the latest chapter, not unlike most of the girls at her school.

Though I admit, I may be reading into things too much but it seems too early in the game to assume simplicity with the characters and plot. I think there will be more flashbacks that'll further explore Sei's character and ultimately reveal how she transformed from such an eager and pure girl into a broken depraved manipulative being.

I think it’s the basic story principle that “any stipulated originary trauma is always sufficient explanation” (even if to any sensible person it seems not at all sufficient, or even trivial).

It's tied to her heart break for sure, but I'm wondering if something more happened between her and Yoru? Was it just confessions that were outright rejected? Or did Yoru do anything to encourage the belief that maybe she and Kuro had a chance? I know she said she'll eventually find a guy, but if she allowed both the emotional and physical boundaries to dissolve between her and Kuro, then that might explain why Kuro's so hung up and became twisted.

Like in the series Liberty, where the MC has become a bizarre twisto sadist because of a breakup with a “lesbian until graduation” high school girlfriend, which any number of other yuri protagonists have dealt with by being sad for a while and then getting on with their lives (maybe with a later “you suck” confrontation at the cultural festival for closure).

I understand that it could be formulaic and simple but there's also a chance that there's a lot more that happened, which could help make Kuro's character more interesting and relatable.

It could be something worse, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it isn’t.

Same. But l think since we're only 9 chapters in, there's a chance we're going to get deeper development and delve deeper into the backstory of Kuro. Maybe it's just my writer brain kicking in, always furthering character development more than necessary or desired.

I love that Kuro is so chaotic and unpredictable that any of these could be her actual motivation. She is clearly super fucked up though, so perhaps she's trying to do all of the above heh.

Another reason could be Kuro wanted Mochida to hear so she'll know she isn't interested in the math teacher at all and Mochida will confirm her woman loving interests and maybe that'll get all the other girls to stop bothering about their heterosexual love lives.

Right now, she's the most complicated person in the manga for me since I feel like I don't know enough about her to really determine her actions. She's drawn with the that look on her face but then she's all smiles and cuddly with Aya and the author hasn't depicted that face during those moments so I can't help but feel like maybe she isn't that bad?

As for the Mochida's reasoning thing, I apologize for how unclear I was. I was actually asking why Mochida told Haruki about Aya and Kuro's relationship. She obviously wants Aya to stay with Kuro so she can hook up with the math teacher, but I'm struggling to understand why she thought that telling Haruki about their relationship would actually help her. I mean, it did, but I doubt that was her intention... or perhaps it was. Did she think that Haruki would support Aya's relationship with a creepy-ass teacher... I think any reasonable person would think that Haruki would instead want to stop that. I'm probably just overthinking this though; she was probably just seeing if Haruki thought Aya would stick with Kuro or just confiding in Haruki or something along those lines. It seems that everyone's scheming to some extent though, so I wouldn't be surprised if Mochida is too.

I maintain that her reasoning is simple one though I failed to elaborate. Mochida probably wants to gossip about her love life and the juicy thing she learned at school. Her school seems full of stuck up girls so maybe she doesn't have that many friends there so she hasn't been able to share this interesting tidbit she's learned?

But if she's a master manipulator then the other reason could be that she's hoping Haruki will spread the gossip about Aya and Kuro and somehow reach their school. Or maybe she's fishing for information about what Haruki knows about Kuro and Aya so she can blab back to her own school that Kuro and Aya are indeed in a relationship (she only heard Kuro propositioning Aya so she doesn't know if Aya agreed or not?). In either of those scenarios, Kuro gets fired/is forced to quit so she can have math teacher all to herself. Though I doubt she's that masterful since she's having trouble getting the attention of one guy.

I'm curious how you think sharing helped her so far? Since it benefits her more if Aya and Kuro continue their relationship?

The Childhood Friend Never Wins.

That's a well known rule of romance manga.

Yeah but we never know when that rule may be broken. There must a be a writer out there suffering from this dilemma and wants to give their self a fictionalized happy ending.

Aaand that's why loving someone can sometimes be ... actually ALWAYS be scary

I hear you.

last edited at Apr 22, 2020 3:28PM

I wouldn't be shocked if Haruki and Mochida hook up for rebound sex.

That's mostly how i see Haruki end. Coming in term with her sexuality and fuck Mochida.

Yeah, I can totally picture Mochida going "What's so good about licking pussy?" and Haruki's just like "I mean, Aya got hooked so it must be good. Want to try?" But in dramatic way of course. lol.

I hope HarukiAya isn’t endgame.

I don't even see how it's a possibility, even if i wanted it.

I mean, nothing's set in stone yet? Not that I'm trying to give anyone false hopes. But at this point, anything goes right? Maybe Aya will reconcile her self and figure out she wants sex from Kuro but emotional intimacy/romance from Haruki? Plus, I'm not familiar with the author so I don't know whether they're big on happy endings or tragedies.

Though given how twisted this manga's turning out to be, I wouldn't be shocked if Haruki and Mochida hook up for rebound sex.

Will Kuro be able to transform her obsession with her ex into real affection for Aya?

I think it's where the manga is headed

I hope so! Shipping Sei and Aya to the max. But judging from the way this story seems to be a flash back, maybe I’m thinking a time skip might happen... which means they might stop and take the time to heal/figure their stuff out.

Will Haruki come to terms with her sexuality?

That and letting Aya go.

I hope HarukiAya isn’t endgame. I want them both to be happy but Haruki only seems to be in love with her idea of Aya.

Although I agree with Shawn's reading of the overall situation, I really don't give a shit who's a good person, or who's a less bad person, or what these people would be doing if they were behaving "correctly."

I care about whether these are interesting people doing interesting things, and at this point I have to say, yeah, they are.

Will Kuro be able to transform her obsession with her ex into real affection for Aya?
Will Haruki come to terms with her sexuality?
How will Aya negotiate her need for connection and her sexual desires?

I don't want to be friends with any of these people. I don't want to use of them for role models. I don't want to put my moral stamp of approval or disapproval on their actions.

I want to know what happens to them, and I'm looking forward to finding out.

I’m also curious to know how Kuro got so messed up. I mean, I know unrequited love but being heart broken once doesn’t seem like it’s enough of a reason to turn into a manipulative chaos weaving user right? Maybe I’m just expecting too much.