So, here is another essay by yours truly about a topic that's been rolling about in my head for a while. I have also wondered what others have observed and thought of. Also, I capitalized the main words when I'm talking about the words themselves and not in relation to other things outside of a romantic relationship (i.e. not, "I love green beans" but instead, "I love Hottie McChan"). Also, I am discussing this within the context of mangas/animes and nothing outside of them though this topic was finally fired up in my brain by the recent Their Story release on the translator's page.
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So, I have always wondered this but, is it me or does the word LOVE get tossed around a lot and in a very nonchalant fashion? This goes for both het and yuri romances, I've only read a couple Yaoi but I have no clue how often love is used in that romance genre. To me, LOVE is a very hefty word to use especially in relation to other people, and especially so when it comes to romantic relationships. Often it seems that LIKE is completely overlooked and the same goes for INFATUATION which, in my honest opinion seems to get even fewer mentions than LIKE if ever.
More than half the time when I'm reading a romance, these two words are completely skipped over and the main/support character jumps immediately to LOVE and borderline obsession. To me, it looks like INFATUATION which is basically head over heels stupid mode (best illustrated in this scene from the movie Love & Sex) is actually being portrayed throughout most romances but is never touched upon. In fact, I'm beginning to suspect that I have yet to come across a romance where INFATUATION is actually discussed as is LIKING someone as well. Most conversations are as follows:
Best Friend-chan: "Do you love her?"
MC-chan: "I um... I DO LOVE HER!!?!?!"
Me: "Really?? You only met her literally 2 seconds ago and you love her? The hell?"
Granted, I tend to view things in a very different manner so this type of mindset is just really foreign to me. And I mean not foreign as in that's how people think in another country but just the thought processes behind it as I know people who are like that here in the States. Granted, I understand that sometimes the story must move along but it would be nice to see a progression through those stages and maybe some form of acknowledgement of them.
In the romances I have read in manga and seen portrayed in anime at the very least, I have almost always felt that LOVE was tossed around like candy at a 4th of July parade while also always being understood to have that serious weight of feelings behind it. However, its use is overused and I just feel like the word holds no actual meaning or weight to it. For example, why does a character almost always have to LOVE someone before they can go out with them and maybe why not fall in love with them after starting to date when they only LIKED them?
To me, it seems like these could add a lot more depth to pretty much, every romance story. The majority of the genre seems pretty stagnant with only a few really good stories here and there popping up as most seem to repeat the initial meeting moment and then quickly goes into one character crushing harder than the fist of an angry god. I am sure there are some exceptions out there but I have yet to find them. Now don't get me wrong, I enjoy my romance stories, I just wish I would see these three words and the actions surrounding them, the internal debates swirling about in the character's head, and even a discussion with a friend or family member on the matter would be a nice change of pace for once ya know.
Anyhoo, those are more or less my thoughts on the matter summarized as best as I can :)
Thanks for reading!